5 Reasons Couples Divorce

HoHum:

"Marriage is not so much finding the right person as it is being the right person." --Anonymous

WBTU:

Mike and Jean have been married 5 years. They come from good families, belong to a good church, and their friends think they are getting along. What their friends don’t know is that Mike and Jean, like so many other couples their age, are getting a divorce.

This couple is not unique. Millions of marriages in US end in divorce, and many divorcing couples are Christians. Divorce is a major tool of the enemy to oppose God’s blueprint for happy homes: homes in which strong marriages produce strong children and thus strengthen both their churches and their communities.

Satan whispers excuses into the ears of men and women- even Christians- to persuade them to divorce their spouses. His arguments sound convincing to people who are going through difficulties in their marriages.

Thesis: Learn how to identify and overcome 5 typical underlying reasons for divorce.

For instances:

Unreasonable expectations

While marriages are failing apart in historically unprecendented proportions, our expectations for marriage have never been higher. Couples expect completely unrealistic things from marriage. They expect a marriage to meet all of their needs and desires. Of course, such expectations lead to disaster.

Luis Palau- A woman phoned me during a live call in television program. She’d been married and divorced and had lived with quite a few men, but she had never found the fulfillment and satisfaction she was looking for. Finally she realized that many of her so called lovers had simply used her and discarded her. She told me (Palau): “I can’t even look at men any more, I’ve been hurt by so many.” She was only 29 years old. Sadly, this is the case with many. Her problem: expecting some man to come along and completely fulfill her.

In reality, no spouse can totally fulfill a mate’s every need, much less a mate’s desires, fantasies and dreams. In marriage we help, encourage, and complement one another, but we can’t fulfill each other.

Waylan Jennings- I was looking for love in all the wrong places Looking for love in too many faces Searching your eyes, looking for traces Of what.. I'm dreaming of...

“Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night.” Psalms 63:3-6, NIV. Is this talking about a human?

Sometimes the key to improving our marriages is bringing our expectations down to earth.

Ungodly focus

Only Jesus Can Satisfy Your Soul by Lanny Wolfe- The world may try to satisfy That longing in your soul. You may search the wide world over But you'll be just as before. You'll never find true satisfaction Until you've found the Lord, For only Jesus can satisfy your soul. CHORUS: Only Jesus can satisfy your soul. Yes, only He can change your heart And make you whole. He'll give you peace you never knew, Sweet joy and love and Heaven, too. For only Jesus can satisfy your soul.

If our relationship with the Lord isn’t right, we will feel unfulfilled and discontented. We may blame our marriages, when in reality our spiritual poverty is the problem.

A marriage is in danger whenever the partners maintain a wrong center of focus. Some focus on their spouses, others devote themselves to their children, and many concentrate on themselves. The only truly satisfying focus, however, is Jesus Christ.

I remember from McDonald’s. They were training a new manager. The training manager oversaw and watched the new manager. The training manager said that he had one criticism. New managers focus was wrong. Focus needed to be on serving customers, not answer the phone (if they really want something they will call back). Our focus needs to be on the Lord.

The Lord is the only one who is able to “bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.” Isaiah 61:3, NIV.

We must realign our focus, our attention, and our allegiance to Him. Only then can we have strong family relationships.

Uncontrolled passions

We pride ourselves on our technological and scientific advances, but we cannot tame oursleves. We lack self control in our diet and exercise. Spending is one of our most uncontrolled passions. So we spend our lives trying to accumulate things, often to the neglect of our marriages. Money issues is often the most contentious thing in marriage today.