5 Truths To A Great Marriage Series

Today I want to share with you a message entitled, “5 Truths to a Great Marriage.” Almost every one of us can improve our marriages. Keep your Bibles open Ephesians, and we conclude our series When Two Become One this morning.

Thank you for joining us. Our hope is that this strengthens the marriages of our church and our community.

Today’s Scripture

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Ephesians 5:25-33).

Marriage is often thought of as between two consenting adults and only those adults. Today, we think no one else has any say in a marriage. But the Bible says marriage is a covenant not just between the two people but with all of society. Your marriage matters to me, and my marriage matters to you.

Hardwired to Connect

A book called Hardwired to Connect was sponsored by Dartmouth Medical School. It was produced by 33 psychiatrists, doctors, sociologists from Duke, Harvard, and Dartmouth. It’s not a Democratic or Republican front organization but bipartisan. In the last forty years, the teenage suicide rate has gone up at least 300 percent, if not more. Sorry to bring up a depressing subject but stay with me for a moment. Teens are much more likely to take their own lives than teenagers in the 1950s.

Emile Durkheim said probably the greatest barometer of the health of the social fabric of a culture is its suicide rate. People commit suicide if they don’t feel they belong, if they’re not sure what their meaning in life is if they don’t know what their purpose is.

Here’s what the thirty-three experts found: if a child is raised with an intact family (in other words, with the same father and mother), it is 2 to 3 times less likely to have suicide attempts, drug addiction, problems with the law. If on top of that, believe it or not, you have a kid who goes weekly to a church or synagogue or mosque, some religious, moral community … … Teens who are in church or synagogue and have in intact families have about a 5 to 10 times better chance of avoiding those things. The empirical facts tell us that marriage isn’t just between two consenting adults, but it’s a part of the fabric of our society. If you say, “My marriage is my business,” then you’re not looking at the facts.

Christian Marriage

I want you to have a Christian marriage and not just a good marriage. Yes, non-Christians can enjoy marriage and can even have good marriages. But I am advocating not simply good marriages but Christian marriages. What is a Christian marriage? A Christian marriage is the permanent union of two born-again people of the opposite sex coming together in every way possible (intimately, emotionally, financially) for the purpose of radical oneness that is modeled in the Trinity and for the goal of encouraging and equipping one another for the time when each appears before Jesus.

Let’s uncover the biblical teaching on marriage.

1. God’s Design for Marriage

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish” (Ephesians 5:25-27).

1.1 Five Verbs

Paul uses five verbs to indicate how Christ is committed to his bride, the church. He loved her, gave Himself up for her, to sanctify her, having cleansed her, that He might present her to Himself. Take note of those five verbs and highlight them in your Bible.

1.2 Christ’s Purpose for You

Pause with me and allow me to ask you a question … What’s Christ’s purpose when He comes into your life? What is He coming into your life to do? Christ comes to bring about change. He’s coming into our lives because we are spiritually twisted, blemished, and ugly, and he wants to make us spiritually brilliant and beautiful. Christ’s purpose is to do all five verbs in you. Again, take note of all five verbs. He wants to love you. He gives Himself up for you. He will sanctify you. He will cleanse you, He wants to present you, and eventually to show you off.