Contributed by Tim Harlow on May 13, 2009
WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "You’re way too stupid to be trusted driving alone in bad weather at your age."
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID, "Drive carefully, dear."
WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "Honey, why don’t you put your head in a vice and I’ll turn the handle until your skull explodes."
WHAT SHE
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
WHAT IS NOT GOD'S WILL
Sometimes we want things we know is not God's will.
Jay Kesler wrote of a time when he caused an auto accident. He prayed that it did not happen, but it did.
I know how the young Jay Kesler felt. I've done things that I wanted to undo and said things that I wanted to
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Baptist
Contributed by Curry Pikkaart on Nov 9, 2011
based on 1 rating
| 3,724 views
THE OLD MAN AND THE SAVIOR
Jan Weinert wrote: "The old man came into the service shortly after it started. He sat at the end of my row, with two vacant seats between us. A noticeable hearing aid was in his ear, and he held the bulletin up to within inches of his thick glasses to try to read it. As
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Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Dennis Clark on Apr 12, 2001
based on 121 ratings
| 2,499 views
A railroad yardmaster called the telephone daily at exactly 11:45 to verify the time. After years of this ritual the operator asked the yardmaster, "Why do you call each day at exactly the same time?" His reply, "I take my responsibilities very seriously, I call to be certain I blow the 12:00
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Baptist
Contributed by Melvin Newland on Oct 10, 2001
based on 111 ratings
| 2,547 views
Alex Haley, the author of "Roots," had an unusual picture hanging on his office wall. It was a picture of a turtle on top of a fence post. When asked, "Why is that there?" Alex Haley answered, "Every time I write something significant, every time I read my words & think that they are wonderful,
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 9, 2001
based on 150 ratings
| 3,671 views
A man died and went to heaven. He was met at the Pearly Gates by St.
Peter who led him down the golden streets. They past mansions after
beautiful mansions until they came to the end of the street where they
stopped in front of a shack. The man asked St. Peter why he got a hut
when there were
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based on 42 ratings
| 5,679 views
Someone once asked Dr. Albert Schweitzer, “What’s wrong with men today?” After a brief pause he said, ”The trouble with men today is that they simply don’t think.”
“Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason why so few engage in it.” Henry Ford
“Few people think more
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Andrew Chan on Apr 23, 2002
based on 15 ratings
| 1,267 views
“In fact, 15 percent of everything Christ said relates to this topic (money and possessions) – more than His teachings on heaven and hell combined. Why did Jesus put such an emphasis on money and possessions? Because there’s a fundamental connection between our spiritual lives and how we think
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Evangelical Free
Contributed by Andrew Chan on Apr 20, 2002
based on 37 ratings
| 1,154 views
“In fact, 15 percent of everything Christ said relates to this topic (money and possessions) – more than His teachings on heaven and hell combined. Why did Jesus put such an emphasis on money and possessions? Because there’s a fundamental connection between our spiritual lives and how we think
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Denomination:
Evangelical Free
Contributed by Paul Fritz on Jun 10, 2001
As Abraham Lincoln prepared to sign the Emancipation Proclamation, he took his pen, moved it to the signature line, paused for a moment, and then dropped the pen. When asked why, the president replied, "If my name goes into history, it will be for this act, and if my hand trembles when I sign it,
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Paul Durbin on Feb 16, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 5,010 views
I’ve read that Michelangelo, the great sculptor and painter, was pushing a heavy rock
up a small incline to his work area so that he could do some sculpting. A neighbor
watched him for over an hour as he worked to get this rock in place. Finally he asked,
"Michelangelo, why do you labor so
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Shawn Drake on Feb 22, 2003
based on 20 ratings
| 4,642 views
The Flaming Wedding Dress
In one of my first weddings I learned to ask an important question. I now ask each bride if her dress has long sleeves. Why? In one particular wedding, the bride and groom approached the unity candle and as they were lighting the candle, the bride's sleeve caught
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Baptist
Contributed by Joel Vicente on Dec 27, 2003
based on 21 ratings
| 1,681 views
Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents’ house the week before Christmas. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers. The younger one began praying at the top of his lungs:
"I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE..."
"I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO..."
His older brother
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by David Parks on Oct 21, 2004
based on 2 ratings
| 7,880 views
On her 60th birthday, a woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her last will and testament. She went to her rabbi to make two final requests: First, she insisted on cremation. “What is your second request?” the rabbi asked. “I want my ashes scattered over Bloomingdale’s.” “Bloomingdale’s. Why
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ