Contributed by Tim Harlow on May 13, 2009
WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "You’re way too stupid to be trusted driving alone in bad weather at your age."
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID, "Drive carefully, dear."
WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "Honey, why don’t you put your head in a vice and I’ll turn the handle until your skull explodes."
WHAT SHE
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Bradley Kellum on Aug 10, 2009
based on 1 rating
| 2,856 views
FROG PRINCE
An 80 year-old woman was walking down the main street in her hometown one evening when she heard a low voice say, "Hey lady."
She looked around to see who was talking but upon seeing nobody there she shrugged it all off and continued walking. Before she got another five feet, she
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Baptist
Contributed by Larry Hinkle on Jun 12, 2020
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Six months after I bought my first car, the "service engine" light came on. I called my dad from college, "What does that service engine light mean? Can I still drive it, or do I need to fix something?" He chuckled and said, it was an idiot light, "It is set to trigger
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Methodist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 3 ratings
| 3,273 views
Henry Blackaby, the author of Experiencing God, tells this heart wrenching story about a situation he encountered early in his ministry. He writes, “The first funeral I ever conducted was for a beautiful three-year-old. She was the first child born to a couple in our church, and the first
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
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Have you seen those new GPS guidance systems that you can get for your car? Some are built in (for several thousand dollars) and some are portable. You can plug them into your lighter or cell phone connection in your car. Then you can touch the screen and tell it where you would like to go and it
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
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A young Colombian Girl received a new testament in her school. She read the new testament until one day her father caught her reading it…and told her not to read it any more because it was full of lies and fantasy…
But the girl kept on reading until one day her father came home unexpectedly found
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Sep 16, 2008
based on 18 ratings
| 1,769 views
Two little boys were the best of friends. As they grew up, their friendship only deepened. One became a preacher and the other a priest. And they would meet each week for coffee at the local Starbucks, no matter what else might be happening.
After one such meeting, they shook hands and started to
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Contributed by Davon Huss on Mar 16, 2009
BEST SPEEDING-TICKET EXCUSE
A convention of Arkansas State troopers was asked to submit the best excuse they’d ever heard for someone trying to get out of a speeding ticket. The winning entry was submitted by a trooper who clocked a semi-tractor truck speeding down the interstate. The trooper
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jun 1, 2004
Corporations often ask their constituents to vote “by proxy.” The proxy is an authorized agent who votes on our behalf, your representative.
The human race has only two proxies: Adam and Jesus Christ. Adam is the default proxy, for we are all
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Independent/Bible
So what about us? We call ourselves Christians, that is followers of Jesus. What kind of disciples are we? Do we have a purely academic interest in the words of Jesus, or are we prepared to put him first in our lives? Are we ready to fish for
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Episcopal/Anglican
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 11, 2007
based on 1 rating
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"Christian unity is not found in uniformity, organization or a particular church, but rather in Jesus and our commitment to His teachings and living them out in our livesIt is only as we join together with others who look different than we do but share a common love and
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Contributed by J. Allen Lucas on Mar 23, 2008
If you read the Quran [Koran] you will discover that the nation of Islam teaches that Jesus did not die on the cross. [Rashad Khalifa, PH. D., Quran: The Final Testament, Authorized English Version, 61]
This argument is not new, but not true either.
Jesus
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
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