Contributed by Dru Ashwell on Dec 16, 2001
based on 19 ratings
| 2,127 views
Actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the
world-famous International Institute of Answering Machine Answers.
~~~~~
Hi. Now you say something.
~~~~~
Hi, I’m not home right now but my answering machine is, so you
can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
~~~~~
Hello. I am David’s
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Dan Steadman on Dec 3, 2004
based on 1 rating
| 3,000 views
----- ‘Twas The Night Jesus Came
‘Twas the night Jesus came and all through the house, not a person was praying, not one in the house...
The Bible was left on the shelf without care… for no one thought Jesus would ever come there...
The children were dressing to crawl into bed, not once ever
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Mark Stepherson on Dec 28, 2004
based on 9 ratings
| 4,404 views
Charles Smith was a Jehovah’s Witness, working his way up in the organization for 37 years. Outside one of their meetings, he noticed someone with a sign that simply said, “1 John 5:13.” He decided he would read it later.
“These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Dean Morgan on Feb 18, 2005
based on 1 rating
| 5,890 views
Twas The Night Before Jesus Came
Twas the night before Jesus came and all through the house
Not a creature was praying, not one in the house.
Their Bibles were lain on the shelf without care
In hopes that Jesus would not come there.
The children were dressing to crawl into bed,
Not once ever
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Anne Benefield on Jan 24, 2008
One time I was leading a retreat for single, middle-age people, that is people in their 40s and 50s. When I looked on the roster, there was a man I knew was 75 if he were a day, but he had signed up so I didn’t question his age. He was a regular at the church and had gone on other retreats. I
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Denomination:
Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Ross Cochrane on Feb 11, 2010
CULTURES: AN ENORMOUS TASK
Sydney has major shopping malls. I mean big and crowded with people. I couldn't help thinking that as I looked down the floor of Westmead Shopping Centre in Sydney, there within a short space, were over 300 people walking towards me. And that was one level where I
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Peter Loughman on Jul 1, 2008
LOST IDENTITY
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Have you ever lost your driver’s license?
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Isn’t it a traumatic event? I have lost my driver’s license several times over the years and each time it made my life difficult. For all practical purposes I lost my identity. I couldn’t write a check – stores will not take a check
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
based on 1 rating
| 2,031 views
"It becomes the disciples of Christ to apply themselves to him for instruction in prayer. Lord, teach us to pray, is itself a good prayer, and a very needful one, for it is a hard thing to pray well and it is Jesus Christ only that can
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Howard Parnell on Sep 26, 2002
based on 136 ratings
| 2,570 views
The story is told of a little girl whose parents never went to church. However, they insisted upon her
attendance and what is more is that she had to be able to recite the preacher’s text for the day. One morning she rushed home excited: "Oh mama, my name is in the Bible." "That’s not likely,"
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 16, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 2,457 views
Matthew was playing in the yard. His grandmother came to the door to check on him and heard him say, "Hell." She was shocked and scolded him, Matthew, we do not use that word. Who did you hear say that?" His reply was, "Rick" (His preacher’s name) "When did he say that?",
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Contributed by Brad Bailey on Aug 9, 2004
based on 6 ratings
| 4,069 views
A minister had run out of time to prepare for a sudden funeral. Using the latest
technology, he went to his computer and found the funeral service he had used last,
and doing a word "search and replace", had the computer put in the name of the newly
deceased, "Edna", as a replacement for the
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Neil Partington on Jul 31, 2007
The second grade teacher had been giving a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron.
Now it was question time, and she asked, “My name begins with the letter M and I pick up things. What am
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Virgil Gibson on Oct 17, 2007
We are living in a generation where stolen identity is very common. This is where someone else uses your name, social security number and etc to make purchases and charges these to your account. This can happen from loosing your wallet or purse, or someone coming in contact with documents with
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Denomination:
Apostolic
Contributed by Jeffery Russell on Jan 17, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 2,793 views
There was a man in the same church I mentioned earlier, his name was Ed. When I knew Ed, he was approaching 100 years old. He was a navy veteran of World War I. He actually lived to be 101, born in the year 1900. I asked Ed, "Sir, what is the greatest thing
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 8, 2008
*Last Saturday, I was walking in our neighborhood, and I passed a house where a little girl about 3-years-old accidentally got Mom or older sister wet with the hose. The adult screamed her name and then screamed, “What’s the matter with you?”
-I promise you that the scream did a
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Contributed by Donnie Martin on Mar 10, 2010
TEENS ADMIRE...?
Have you thought lately about who teenagers admire? World Almanac and Book of Facts surveyed eight graders a few years ago and discovered that the top thirty names were movie stars and athletes. Not one admired adult was a religious leader, statesman, author, painter, doctor,
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Denomination:
Baptist