In Sermon Illustrations: "Take Off"

There Was A Manager Of A Minor League Baseball ...  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Sep 26, 2002

There was a manager of a minor league baseball team who was so disgusted with his center fielder’s performance that he ordered him to the dugout and assumed the position himself. The first ball that came into center field took a bad hop and hit the manager in the mouth. The next one was a high fly ...read more

Three Men Waiting In The Room For Expectant ...  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 11, 2002

Three men waiting in the room for expectant fathers waited for word on the arrival of their infants. Some while later a nurse comes in and announces to one of the men that his wife had just given birth to twins. ’that’s amazing he said - I play for the Minnesota Twins’ ! About twenty minutes later ...read more

Tags: Parenting, Children

When I Went To A Crossways Conference The ...  PRO

Contributed by Curt Cizek on Apr 19, 2003

When I went to a Crossways conference the presenter spoke about his tour of the Holy Lands in 1998. The tour gude got on the bus, introduced himself as Amnon. He said that he was named after one of King David’s sons. The presenter said, "You mean the one that assaulted his half-sister Tamar?" ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 1:1-14

Tags: Jesus Christ

Denomination: Lutheran

Boudreaux And Dufrene Were Drinking A Few Beers ...

Contributed by Louis Bartet on Apr 27, 2003

Boudreaux and Dufrene were drinking a few beers while driving around, when Boudreaux saw a roadblock ahead. He couldn’t turn around, so he told Dufrene, "peel the label off your bottle and put in on your forehead." "Are you crazy," Dufrene responded? "No! Just do it and let me do the talking," ...read more

Tags: Truth

Denomination: Assembly Of God

The Greatest Difference Of Religions Lies Between ...  PRO

Contributed by Tom Mccrossan on Jun 19, 2003

The greatest difference of religions lies between the Bible which says we can never save ourselves - that salvation is the gift of God through faith in Christ Jesus (Eph. 2:8-9); and all the other religions which say a person will be saved, reborn, made whole, or achieve fulfillment by keeping ...read more

Tags: World Religions

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Four Preachers Met For A Friendly Gathering. ...  PRO

Contributed by Jeff Simms on May 19, 2003

Four preachers met for a friendly gathering. During the conversation one preacher said, “Our people come to us and pour out their hearts, confess sins and needs. Let’s do the same. Confession is good for the soul.” In due time all agreed. One confessed he liked to go to the movies and would ...read more

Tags: Sin General

Denomination: Baptist

Bobby And Susie Were Playing Upstairs While ...  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 25, 2004

Bobby and Susie were playing upstairs while their mother was doing the dishes. All of the sudden, the children’s mother heard, "Thud, Thud, Thud...", and she ran to see what had happened. She went to the base of the stairs to find Susie curled up in a little ball and crying. Susie then told her ...read more

Tags: Children

A Methodist Minister Was Continually Bragging ...  PRO

Contributed by Charles R. Swindoll on Oct 13, 2004

• A Methodist minister was continually bragging to his Baptist minister friends about the greatness of his church. No matter what they said, he always found a way to claim that the Methodists were better. Eventually his friends got tired of this, and decided to play a prank on the Methodist. One ...read more

Tags: Death

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

I Am Thankful...  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 16, 2004

I AM THANKFUL... I am Thankful that we only elect presidents once every four years. I am Thankful that teenagers will grow up and that one day they will have children that will become teenagers of their own. I am Thankful that I am not a turkey this week. I am Thankful that the space available ...read more

Scripture: Philippians 2:1-8

Tags: Thanksgiving Holiday

Everyone Enjoys Holding And Looking At A New ...

Contributed by D. Greg Ebie on Dec 9, 2004

Everyone enjoys holding and looking at a new baby. Eventually the conversation will turn to something like this: “Oh she has her mommy’s eyes,” or “He looks like his dad.” As children grow up it’s amazing not only how much they may look like their parents, but even more so how much children act ...read more

Tags: Basics Of Christianity

Denomination: Assembly Of God

If We Have Failed In Any Respect In This Matter ...

Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Apr 13, 2007

If we have failed in any respect in this matter of “go…preach” it is probably related to our limited understanding of what the church is. Bishop Leslie Newbigin, labeled as “one of the leading influences on the theology of mission” (Wilbert R. Shenk) in the 20th century, was once quoted as saying, ...read more

Denomination: Salvation Army

During One Of His Political Campaigns, A ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007

During one of his political campaigns, a delegation called on Theodore Roosevelt at his home in Oyster Bay, Long Island. The President met them with his coat off and his sleeves rolled up. "Ah, gentlemen," he said, "come down to the barn and we will talk while I do some work." At the barn, ...read more

Tags: Faith

There Was A Farmer That Found An Eagle Egg Where ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007

There was a farmer that found an Eagle egg where the mother had died or left the egg. So he placed it under one of his hens and it hatched in the hen house. At first, the eagle scratched like a chicken and ate like a chicken. But The bigger he got, he became aware that he was not a chicken. He ...read more

Tags: Guilt

There Was A "One-Hour Dry Cleaners," On The ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007

There was a "One-Hour Dry Cleaners," on the other side of town, so a man drove out of his way to drop off a suit. After filling out the tag, he told the clerk, "I need this in an hour." She said, "I can’t get this back to you until Thursday." "I thought you did dry cleaning in an hour?" "No," she ...read more

Tags: Church Body Of Christ

A Supermarket In The Midwest Could Not ...  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007

A supermarket in the Midwest could not understand why at a certain time every winter there sales plummeted. They studied their product line and interviewed customers. They did everything possible to uncover the mystery. Finally someone made a remarkable discovery that changed everything. It seemed ...read more

Tags: Faith General

In The Highlands Of Scotland, Sheep Would Often ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007

In the Highlands of Scotland, sheep would often wander off into the rocks and get into places that they couldn’t get out of. The grass on these mountains is very sweet and the sheep like it, and they will jump down ten or twelve feet, and then they can’t jump back again, and the shepherd hears them ...read more

Tags: People In Acts

So With This Power And Promise Of Prayer, What's ...

Contributed by Richard Francis on Jun 23, 2007

So with this power and promise of prayer, what’s gone wrong? Why is the world still in this mess, why is there so much hurt, so much pain, why does the Church seem to be on the back foot, receding not growing? We have the first aid kit, we have the solution. But we don’t use it. Its like having a ...read more

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Shortly After Herman Ostry Bought A Piece Of ...

Contributed by Patrick Mccosh on Jul 23, 2007

Shortly after Herman Ostry bought a piece of property in Bruno, Nebraska, a nearby creek flooded his new barn with 29 inches of water. Herman’s son Mike started thinking about the problem. Mike counted the number of boards, timbers, and nails, estimating the barn’s weight at 19,000 pounds. Mike ...read more

Denomination: Baptist

Bits And Pieces, October, 1991

Contributed by Troy Borst on Aug 20, 2007

ILLUSTRATION… Bits and Pieces, October, 1991 A woman’s red station wagon was crushed by an elephant at a circus. The owners of the animal apologized, explaining that the animal, for some reason, simply liked to sit on red cars. In spite of the damage, the woman’s car was still drivable. But on the ...read more

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

E. One Time While Doing Training At Fort Riley, ...

Contributed by Curt Cizek on Sep 22, 2007

e. One time while doing training at Fort Riley, I got out of my vehicle. There was no moon light and it was very cloudy. I figured I could find the remainder of my vehicles because I could hear them running. I started walking towards the next vehicle when all four of my vehicles shut off. I ...read more

Denomination: Lutheran