In Sermon Illustrations: "Profitable Old Testament"

My Grandmother Lived Until She Was 108. Now That ...

Contributed by Ross Cochrane on Dec 15, 2009

My grandmother lived until she was 108. Now that is a long life! At 90 I remember her going on expeditions with a lapidary club. She loved collecting rocks and climbing mountains and walking for incredible distances. She would talk about the old people in the nursing home in which she lived. They ...read more

Tags: Aging

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

I've Been Good, ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 10, 2009

"I’VE BEEN GOOD, BUT..." Grandma was rushing her two grandkids ages five and three out to the car from shopping when five year old Jason spoke up. "Grams, Susie put something in her pocket in the store." After a quick investigation, Grams discovered that Susie had picked up some pretty red ...read more

Tags: Repentance

The Death Of The Pillsbury Doughboy

Contributed by Garris Hudson on Dec 22, 2022

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N. Fresh, the Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. Known to friends as Brown-n-Serve, Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player. Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of ...read more

Tags: Death, Jokes, Funerals, Puns, Obituaries, Dad Jokes  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

How A Pastor Loved His Enemy

Contributed by Garris Hudson on Feb 2, 2023

In The Grace of Giving, Stephen Olford tells of a Baptist pastor during the American Revolution, Peter Miller, who lived in Ephrata, Pennsylvania, and enjoyed the friendship of George Washington. In Ephrata also lived Michael Wittman, an evil-minded sort who did all he could to oppose and ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 5:19-23

Tags: Love, Forgiveness, Hate, Pastors, Churches, Enemies, Division  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

He Made His Worst Enemy His Best Friend!

Contributed by Garris Hudson on Jun 12, 2023

In the days of the American Revolution there lived at Ephrata, Pennsylvania, a Baptist pastor by the name of Peter Miller who enjoyed the friendship of General Washington. There also dwelt in that town a man named Michael Wittman who was an evil-minded man who did all in his power to oppose this ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 18:24

Tags: Love, Forgiveness, Agape Love, Friends, Enemies  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

A Funnnnnnnnny Thanksgiving Story!

Contributed by Garris Hudson on Nov 15, 2023

Two men were walking through a field one day when they spotted an angry old bull who wanted them out of his pasture. Instantly, they darted toward the nearest fence. The storming bull followed in hot pursuit and it was soon apparent that they wouldn't make it. Terrified, one man shouted to ...read more

Tags: Fear, Thanksgiving, Prayer, Humor, Gratitude  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

President Andrew Jackson Is Going To Hell

Contributed by Revd. Martin Dale on Oct 24, 2025

There was a fiery old revival preacher named Peter Cartwright who was famous for telling it like it is. He was preaching near Washington D.C. And the people of the church heard that President Andrew Jackson was coming to visit them. So, they pulled Cartwright aside and said: "Listen Peter, ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 9:17

Tags: Hell, President Jackson, Peter Cartright

Denomination: Anglican

Folks I'd Like To Introduce The Legendary Johnny ...  PRO

Contributed by Don Hawks on Feb 28, 2002

Folks I’d like to introduce the legendary Johnny Cash and his famous song—A Boy Named Sue. (Singer with guitar sings song) My daddy left home when I was three And he didn’t leave much to ma and me Just this old guitar and an empty bottle of booze. Now, I don’t blame him cause he run and hid But ...read more

Tags: Endurance

Denomination: Methodist

Sammy's Big Catch - Sammy Was A Young Boy Who ...  PRO

Contributed by Charles Wall, Jr. on Aug 26, 2003

Sammy’s Big Catch - Sammy was a young boy who lived in the Deep South. His summer days were filled when times of walking through the woods, playing with friends, and fishing in the pond down the road. Fishing was by far his favorite thing to do. Just about every day during his summer vacation, ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 3:1-23

Tags: Sin General, Sin Wages Of, Sin Deceptive

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

There Was A Young Man Who Grew Up In The ...

Contributed by Philip Harrelson on Oct 16, 2004

There was a young man who grew up in the backwoods and as his years lengthened, he was sent to school. At first, school was fun to him. He enjoyed being around those children his own age and found great excitement on the playground. Little by little all of this soon was to change. This young ...read more

Tags: Endurance, Forgiveness General

Denomination: Pentecostal

Ignorance Is Bliss! Maybe I Should Say Innocence ...

Contributed by Richard Mcnair on Nov 4, 2004

Ignorance is bliss! Maybe I should say innocence is bliss. A world of rich possibilities and dreams carry many young people from high school graduation to attend college and eventually a career. These innocent minds leave home and if they aren’t already, they are seduced into allowing their ...read more

Tags: Homosexuality

Denomination: Baptist

The Meanest Man In Texas

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 5, 2012

THE MEANEST MAN IN TEXAS Let's finish with the true and amazing story of Clyde Thompson. Clyde's father was a Bible salesman, but when he was old enough to stay home alone, he began refusing to go to church with the rest of the family. Most Sundays, while his family was in church, Clyde was ...read more

Scripture: 2 Corinthians 5:16-21

Tags: Bible Influence

Go Back And Tell Them Again  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 14, 2009

GO BACK AND TELL THEM AGAIN Jesus said "Follow me and I will make you Fishers of Men." In a book entitled "Jungle Harvest," written by a missionary named Ruby Scott, she describes some of her experiences in reaching a people group known as the Tila Indians who lived in a remote village in the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 4:19

Tags: Evangelism The Lost

This Past Thursday, I Had The Opportunity To Ride ...  PRO

Contributed by Gene Gregory on Nov 8, 2004

This past Thursday, I had the opportunity to ride with 2 deputies in the Oviedo area. That night, I rode with a deputy as he patrolled his area and one of the things we did was drive around behind many of the stores and shopping centers to make sure there were no problems there. Of the patrol ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 6:8, Isaiah 6:9

Tags: Repentance, Salvation, Confession Of Sin

Denomination: Baptist

Craig Von Buseck Tells Of Serving As An Assoc...

Contributed by Tim Smith on May 28, 2015

Craig von Buseck tells of serving as an associate pastor in Pennsylvania. After more than five years on staff, he began sensing that the Lord wanted him to leave this church to complete his ministry training. Relations were beginning to become strained between himself and the senior pastor. While ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 5:25

Tags: Holy Spirit, God's Guidance

Denomination: Methodist

Leo Tolstoy Had A Marvelous Metaphor About The ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007

Leo Tolstoy had a marvelous metaphor about the need for us to set definite boundaries on our own appetites. It is called “How Much Land Does a Man Need?" There was a peasant named Pahom who worked hard and honestly for his family. He always remained poor and thought, "If only we had our own land, ...read more

Tags: Commitment To Christ

[237 E] [5]. A Message From A Poem - Scenes From The Gospels - Part 5

Contributed by Ron Ferguson on Nov 17, 2025

[237 E] [5]. A MESSAGE FROM A POEM - SCENES FROM THE GOSPELS - PART 5 They are here to enjoy! Scenes from the Gospels are very special to me. I love them. They have taken a lot of effort, and many, many months revision to get them as correct as possible with the difficult word limitations. ...read more

Scripture: Luke 12:16-21, John 14:1-6, Matthew 2:12-13, Matthew 16:24-27, Matthew 22:16-22, Luke 1:1-4, Matthew 13:10-13  (view more)  (view less)

Tags: Christian Poems, Paying Tax To Caesar, Overturn Tables, Take Up Your Cross, The Way, The Truth, The Life, Render To Caesar, The Rich Fool, Follow Jesus, Money Changers, Merry, Required, Stories, I Am The Way, Temple, Soul, Eat, Thomas, Drink  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Chillin Ain’t What I Thought It Was

Contributed by James Snyder on Oct 3, 2020

Last week the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage came up with a brilliant idea. At least, at the time, it seemed brilliant. “Why don’t we,” she began, “take Monday off and just chill?” Since it's been a long time since I did any chillin, I had to ask her, "What do we chill ...read more

Scripture: Amos 3:3

Tags: Humor, Vacation, Day Off

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

There Was A Farmer Who Had Three Sons: Ron, Don ...  PRO

Contributed by Tim George on Apr 29, 2001

There was a farmer who had three sons: Ron, Don and Little John. All had their names on the church roll but none ever attended church or had time for God. Then one day Don was bitten by a rattlesnake. The doctor was called and he did all he could to help Don, but the outlook for his recovery was ...read more

Scripture: James 1:26-27, Luke 13:3, Luke 13:10-17, Luke 13:6-9

Tags: Faith, Commitment To Christ, Clean

Denomination: Baptist

88 Reasons  PRO

Contributed by Bradford Robinson on Jun 15, 2001

88 REASONS You might remember a man by the name of Edgar Whisenant. He was a NASA engineer who used his mathematical skills to set a date for the return of Jesus. He wrote a book called, "88 Reasons Why the Rapture Will Take Place in 1988" The book caused a real buzz in the Christian ...read more

Tags: Parable Ten Virgins, Second Coming, Jesus Teachings

Denomination: Methodist