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In Sermon Illustrations: "Profitable Old Testament"

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  • Hoarders And The New Birth

    Contributed by Ken Pell on Jun 1, 2013
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,843 views

    The New Birth (John 3 & 2 Cor. 5:17) "Hoarders" Have you ever watched the show, "Hoarders?" It's about people who have a hard time throwing things away. They simply collect and, eventually, the clutter overwhelms them. The thing about a hoarder is that, unless there is a change within, the ...read more

  • A Drunk Stumbled Along A Baptismal Service On ...  PRO

    Contributed by Jeff Strite on May 8, 2001
    based on 280 ratings
     | 6,638 views

    A drunk stumbled along a baptismal service on Sunday afternoon down by the river. He proceeded to walk down into the water and stood next to the Preacher. The minister turned and noticed the old drunk and said, "Mister, Are you ready to find Jesus?" The drunk looks back and says, "Yes, Preacher. ...read more

  • There Is A Story About A Father Who Became ...  PRO

    Contributed by Mark Hensley on Mar 20, 2002
    based on 6 ratings
     | 1,852 views

    There is a story about a father who became disturbed about the length of time his six year old son was taking to get home from school. The father decided he would make the trip to discover for himself how long it should take a small boy to cover the distance. The father settled on 20 minutes but ...read more

  • The Art Collector  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 11, 2002
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,754 views

    The Art Collector A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store. He does a double take. He knows that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable, so he walks casually into the store and offers to buy the cat ...read more

  • A Real Magic Wand  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Oct 21, 2002
    based on 4 ratings
     | 4,017 views

    A REAL MAGIC WAND Laurie Beth Jones tells in her book, Grow Something Besides Old. She talks about one Halloween night when she had underestimated the number of children who would come to the door to trick or treat, and she ran out of candy. In desperation, she began giving out quarters, nickels, ...read more

  • I Heard A Story About A Family That Tragically ...  PRO

    Contributed by Klaus Mehrl on Mar 28, 2005
    based on 6 ratings
     | 4,744 views

    I heard a story about a family that tragically lost three of their four children within just two weeks to a deadly, virulent disease. One child was left – a four year old boy. The family had buried the third child just two weeks before Easter. On Easter morning the parents and the remaining child ...read more

  • There's A Story Of A Man Named Mr. Brown Who Ran ...

    Contributed by Bryan Dill on Oct 25, 2006
     | 1,751 views

    There’s a story of a man named Mr. Brown who ran a clinic for rich women who didn’t have much to do. They had been idle so long together that their nerves got the best of them. They imagined all sorts of things wrong with themselves as they grumbled about their aches and pains. Mr. Brown and ...read more

  • We Have A Tendency To See The Past As Being ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,146 views

    We have a tendency to see the past as being better than what it was… The good old days really weren’t all that good. We forget about all the hardships: (The depression, no air conditioning, out houses, no running water). Back in the days before electricity, a tightfisted old farmer was taking his ...read more

  • One Stormy Night A Boat Could Make No Headway, ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,714 views

    One stormy night a boat could make no headway, and while the captain was struggling to get into port, a nervous passenger said to him: "Do you think we will get in all right?" He replied: "This is a leaky old boat, and we may go down; and the boilers are not in very good condition, so we may go up. ...read more

  • Sometimes People Think God Does Not Know What ...

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Apr 21, 2008
     | 2,607 views

    Sometimes people think God does not know what they are thinking. But He knows that some people are just "using" God, but they really detest Him. At a tea for officers and their wives, the commanding general of a base delivered a seemingly endless oration. A young lieutenant grumbled to the woman ...read more

  • Priority Lesson  PRO

    Contributed by Brian Harvison on Aug 16, 2008
    based on 6 ratings
     | 6,100 views

    Priority Lesson At a nursing home in Florida a resident group was discussing ailments. "My arms are so weak I can hardly life this cup of coffee," said one. "Yes I know, my cataracts are so bad I can't even see my coffee," replied another. "I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my ...read more

  • Guten-Something...

    Contributed by Bobby Scobey on Oct 22, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,604 views

    Guten-Something... A book collector ran into an unbookish acquaintance who soon revealed that old books didn't mean anything to him. In fact, he observed he had just thrown away a big old Bible which had been packed away in the attic of his ancestral home for generations. He was describing it ...read more

  • Giving, Greed And Salvation

    Contributed by Russell Brownworth on Mar 12, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 5,034 views

    GIVING, GREED AND SALVATION A very old rich skinflint in declining health finally gets serious about his eternal state. He goes to the local pastor and asks what he can do to account for the fact that he’s never given God much time or given the church a dime. The pastor just looks at him with that ...read more

  • No Renovation...demolition!

    Contributed by Ross Cochrane on Mar 22, 2010
     | 4,127 views

    NO RENOVATION...DEMOLITION! My son and daughter in law are wanting to renovate their home. They need more space with a new baby coming. As it is, my granddaughter sleeps in what was once a large walk-in closet. So they really need some space. Even then the house will still be small. The house ...read more

  • One Report States That Kids Are Media ...

    Contributed by Jeremy Lane on May 15, 2010
     | 1,923 views

    One report states that kids are media multi-tasking 29% of the time 31% of kids say they multi-task while doing homework 8-18 year olds are exposed to 7 hours 38 minutes of media per day (with multi-tasking, turns into a total of 10 hours 45 minutes per day) 15-18 year olds spend 1 hour 51 ...read more

  • Rest In Peace  PRO

    Contributed by Major Gerardo Balmori on Apr 2, 2011
    based on 2 ratings
     | 5,845 views

    REST IN PEACE Six-year-old and his four-year-old sister presented their mom with a Mother’s Day present: a small, spindly house plant. While it wasn’t the finest looking specimen, they had bought it with their own money and Mom was thrilled. She hugged and kissed her children and told them ...read more

  • Time Marches On  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 10, 2011
    based on 3 ratings
     | 5,443 views

    TIME MARCHES ON There was once a middle aged man who was considering going back to school to get that degree he had always wanted. But he was balking at the idea because he was now over 50 and what good would it do him now. He went to his dad for advice and his dad asked him how long it would ...read more

  • All By Myself?

    Contributed by Perry Greene on Dec 27, 2011
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,395 views

    ALL BY MYSELF? The story is told of an old lady who had moved to the United States from Europe when she was a child, but now she wanted to officially become a citizen of this country. After months of going through all the necessary red tape, she was finally ready to take the required ...read more

  • Contentment

    Contributed by Paul Steen on Dec 11, 2017
    based on 1 rating
     | 12,619 views

    Two old friends met each other on the street one day. One looked sad and almost on the verge of tears. His friend asked, “What has happened to you, my old friend?” The sad fellow said, “Let me tell you. Three weeks ago, my uncle died and left me forty thousand dollars.” “That’s a lot of money,” ...read more

  • Don't Wait For A Cyclone To Preach The Word!

    Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Jan 25, 2021
     | 1,389 views

    A.W. Tozer once said, "I heard of one graduate of a theological school who determined to follow his old professor’s advice and preach the Word only. His crowds were average. Then one day a cyclone hit the little town and he yielded to the temptation to preach on the topic, “Why God Sent A ...read more