In Sermon Illustrations: "Pastor Jokes"

The Love Of Christ Enables Believers  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on May 31, 2010

THE LOVE OF CHRIST ENABLES BELIEVERS I like the way one pastor put it years ago (1986) when he became overwhelmed with all the "ideals" he was collecting from church growth seminars and books. He said, "Quite frankly, I'm sick to death of ideals. I have so many ideals and I've been so frustrated ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 4:13-16

Tags: Growth In Christ

Underdoing Personal Responsibility

Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 5, 2010

UNDERDOING PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY Craig Groeschel, a well known pastor and author of the "Christian Atheist" says: "As Christians, we can be tempted to 'overdo faith.' I put that in quotes because it would be more accurate to say it's 'underdoing personal responsibility.' There's really no way ...read more

Scripture: James 2:14-26

Tags: Faith Vs. Works

Cruel Grace  PRO

Contributed by Bret Toman on Jan 4, 2011

CRUEL GRACE "Thirty years ago, many people chose churches based on whether the church believed and taught the truth. Today, many choose churches based on whether the church makes them feel comfortable. If a church tells the truth, it will gain some people but lose others. One out of five women ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 13:6

Tags: Grace

Denomination: Baptist

I Tithe—he'll Find Me.  PRO

Contributed by Denn Guptill on May 1, 2011

"I TITHE--HE'LL FIND ME." Two men have ended up marooned on an island in the South Pacific. You can fill in the blanks as to how they got there. So they are on the clichéic deserted island, one palm tree, nothing to see but the ocean. One guy is in a complete panic, pacing back and forth, ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 3:5-21, Matthew 23:23

Tags: Offering, Tithe, Tithes

Denomination: Wesleyan

Stop Or Slow Down  PRO

Contributed by Akinsanya Adubi on May 6, 2011

STOP OR SLOW DOWN Pastor John Hagee told us a story of a driver that refused to stop at a STOP sign; he was then pulled over by a cop. The cop told him that the reason he pulled him over was because he refused to stop at a STOP sign. He replied that he slowed down, the cop then explain to him that ...read more

Scripture: Luke 6:38

Tags: Sin Bondage To

Denomination: Pentecostal

God Picks The Unlovable Ones

Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 15, 2011

GOD PICKS THE UNLOVABLE ONES Anne Lamott described a time when a fellow church member told about adopting her son through an organization called A.S.K. -- Adopt Special Kids. Part of the adoption process included filling out a questionnaire checking "yes" or "no" for one's willingness to adopt ...read more

Scripture: John 4:1-42

Tags: Adoption

Not If Jesus Is Like Dad  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 21, 2011

NOT IF JESUS IS LIKE DAD Some months ago I heard a touching story about a humble, consecrated pastor whose young son had become very ill. After the boy had undergone an exhaustive series of tests, the father was told the shocking news that his son had a terminal illness. The youngster had accepted ...read more

Scripture: John 14:1-3

Tags: Father's Day

Travelers Vs. Tourists

Contributed by Tim Hinrichs on Mar 29, 2012

TRAVELERS VS. TOURISTS Canadian Pastor Mark Buchanan in his book "Your Church is Too Safe" points out the radical difference between a traveler and a tourist. "A traveler literally means 'one who travails.' He labors, he suffers, endures. A traveler -- travailer - ...immerses himself in a culture, ...read more

Tags: Discipleship

Denomination: Lutheran

God, You're In My Way.  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on May 28, 2012

"GOD, YOU'RE IN MY WAY." A California pastor, Kyle Idleman, talks about his last move in his book, Not a Fan. In that move, he saved the heaviest piece of furniture for last -- the desk from his office. And as he was pushing and pulling the desk with all his might, his four-year-old son came over ...read more

Scripture: Philippians 4:6-8, Philippians 4:4-7

Tags: Anxiety

A Story To Tell

Contributed by Bobby Jenkins on Feb 2, 2013

A STORY TO TELL (A poem to honor our military veterans ) By Pastor Bobby W. Jenkins Jr. A story to tell, one we can’t fully understand One of sacrifice and bravery of so many men A story to tell of a perilous fight That cost so many their lives and gathered such might A story to tell of the ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 33:12

Tags: Military, America, Soldier, Veterans, Holidays Civic  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Assembly Of God

God Is Not An Assistant  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on May 23, 2013

ARE YOU LOOKING FOR AN ASSISTANT? Tim Keller, a pastor in Manhattan, New York, said that in 1970 a Sunday school teacher changed his life with a simple illustration. The teacher said, “Let’s assume the distance between the earth and the sun (92 million miles) was reduced to the thickness of this ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 1:1-3

Tags: God's Omnipotence

Trials

Contributed by Tim Smith on May 28, 2015

Sam Dixon was the General Secretary of the United Methodist Committee on Relief. He died under the rubble in the Montana Hotel of Haiti, serving God while meeting with other relief agencies to work together to better help the Haitian people. When one serves God so faithfully and suddenly is killed, ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 7:13-16

Tags: God's Sovereignty, Serving, Choices, The Price To Follow

Denomination: Methodist

What’s Pete Got To Do With Anything?

Contributed by James Snyder on Feb 20, 2021

If there's anybody that can be conned, it's Yours Truly. It's not so much that I'm stupid; I'm just naïve. I believe when somebody says something, they mean exactly what they say. So, if you can't swindle me, you might as well hang it up and get a real job. I must ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 3:12-13

Tags: Blame, Accusations

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

From Roast Turkey To Reindeer

Contributed by James Snyder on Dec 9, 2023

Nothing is more confusing than being in the middle of two holidays. I have just finished Thanksgiving, and now Christmas is before me. Each year, it gets more difficult to adjust to the next holiday. It’s hard for me to keep up. For months, the focus was on that roast turkey for Thanksgiving. And ...read more

Scripture: Amos 3:3

Tags: Turkey, Reindeer, Christmas, Thanksgiving

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Steve Lyons Will Be Remembered As The Player Who ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 10, 2006

Steve Lyons will be remembered as the player who dropped his pants. He could be remembered as an outstanding infielder ... as the player who played every position for the Chicago White Sox ... as the guy who always dove into first base ... as a favorite of the fans who high fived the guy who ...read more

Scripture: John 20:19-31

Tags: Sin General, Abandon

Moses, Aaron And Hur Went To The Top Of The Hill. ...  PRO

Contributed by Joel Pankow on Aug 14, 2003

Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. 11 As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. 12 When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his ...read more

Scripture: Exodus 5:11

Tags: Jesus Christ, Lordship Of Christ

Denomination: Lutheran

There Are Going To Be Things Happen To You In ...  PRO

Contributed by Timothy Smith on Jul 19, 2004

There are going to be things happen to you in this life that will make you cling to that eternal hope because there is no other. Wally and Barbara Rendel know that’s true. Wally is the minister at the Southern Acres Christian Church in Lexington and has been for over 20 years. But five years ago ...read more

Tags: Easter Resurrection

Denomination: Christian Church

Blessed Are Those Who Mourn  PRO

Contributed by Terry Laughlin on Aug 11, 2008

Blessed Are Those Who Mourn One of the greatest messages ever proclaimed was delivered by Jesus Christ and is referred to as the "Sermon on the Mount." His message is as relevant today as it was when it was first spoken. Our Lord opens this message not with a joke, but with the Beatitudes. The ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 5:4

Tags: Character

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

The Compassion Of Jesus Makes A Funeral A ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 10, 2010

The Compassion of Jesus Makes a Funeral a Celebration When I was in the 5th grade and we lived above the funeral home in Pawnee, there was no street celebration, no brass band or snare drum or festive umbrellas but the funeral for Rev Sonious’ wife was something to behold. Just months before she ...read more

Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

Tags: Funerals Christian

An Amusing Sight!

Contributed by Loyd C. Taylor on Sep 2, 2023

An Amusing Sight! Use as an Icebreaker. Ron, Billy, a Dodge Truck and a Red Lawnmower Humorous story, in which you can change the names to fit a couple of guys from your congregation. Make sure you get their permission to joke about them. We know how thin skinned some people are. Lead in... As you ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 17:22, Job 8:21, Psalm 65:12-13, Psalm 96:12, Proverbs 15:13, Proverbs 31:25  (view more)  (view less)

Tags: Laughter, Icebreaker, Funny Story, Trucks, Bikes, Lighten Up, Joy, Humor  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Baptist