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In Sermon Illustrations: "Pastor Humor"

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  • Did You See The Move Shallow Hal? It Is A Movie ...  PRO

    Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Oct 19, 2003
    based on 11 ratings
     | 2,149 views

    Did you see the move Shallow Hal? It is a movie about an unattractive, really shallow middle-aged man named Hal Larsen who judges women on how “hot” they are. But then one day, Hal gets stuck on a stalled elevator with a motivational guru who helps him overcome his shallowness by hypnotizing him ...read more

  • No Matter What  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Oct 30, 2003
    based on 5 ratings
     | 3,577 views

    NO MATTER WHAT A number of years ago, there was a newspaper account of a speech given by the president of a well-known university to a group of influential businessmen and civic leaders. The president told of a recent experience which he, his audience, and the newspaper reporter found humorous. ...read more

  • Dick Alexander, Raw  PRO

    Contributed by Steve Malone on Apr 15, 2004
    based on 12 ratings
     | 1,750 views

    Dick Alexander, Raw It’s a word I never liked Raw carrots are too hard Raw oysters too slimy Raw humor is too dirty Raw skin is too painful In fact raw applied to anything human sounds painful But we live in a world of raw human need It’s all around us Do you ever wonder how many people struggle ...read more

  • Gen. Douglas Macarthur Wrote This Prayer For His ...  PRO

    Contributed by Melvin Newland on Feb 19, 2001
    based on 155 ratings
     | 5,342 views

    Gen. Douglas MacArthur wrote this prayer for his son. He prayed: "Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, & brave enough to face himself when he is afraid. One who will be proud & unbending in honest defeat, & humble & gentle in victory. "Build me a son ...read more

  • Last Lecture

    Contributed by Don Hawks on Aug 2, 2008
     | 2,739 views

    LAST LECTURE You may have heard about the death of 47 year old Carnegie Mellon University computer-science professor Randy Pausch last week from pancreatic cancer. Pausch was most famous for his "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams" speech made last fall just after he learned he had months to ...read more

  • Six-Word Memoirs  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Sasnett on Jan 19, 2009
    based on 5 ratings
     | 2,529 views

    Six-Word Memoirs One of the surprising best-selling books of 2008 is "Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure." Notice that the main title is only six words: "Not Quite What I Was Planning." People were asked to succinctly sum up their life in six ...read more

  • What's That Noise?

    Contributed by Dennis Davidson on Sep 3, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,187 views

    WHAT'S THAT NOISE? I read a humorous story about a man who strolled out of a hardware store with a smile on his face and a brand-new chainsaw in his hands. He was told it could cut down five big oak trees in an hour. Twenty-four hours later, however, his smile was gone. Frustrated, he was back at ...read more

  • Construction Worker Survives 110-Foot ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 4, 2010
     | 6,157 views

    Construction Worker Survives 110-Foot Fall This past week I was reading in “God’s Word for You Today” devotional about Randy Reid, a thirty-four-year old construction worker, who was welding on top of a nearly completed water tower outside Chicago. According to writer Melissa Ramsdell, Reid ...read more

  • The Bridal Suite

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 27, 2011
     | 4,540 views

    THE BRIDAL SUITE Cynthia Thomas tells a story about her "brother and his new wife who were escorted to their bridal suite in an elegant hotel in the wee hours of the morning. They were tired from the many hours at their wedding reception and from mingling with their guests. They took a look around ...read more

  • Churches In Competition Against Each Other

    Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Aug 5, 2023
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,822 views

    Three churches, located on different corners of the same intersection, didn't get along together. One Sunday each of them opened their meeting with a rousing song service. It was a warm day and all the doors and windows were wide open. One congregation began singing the old hymn, "Will ...read more

  • Let Me Put It To You Like This

    Contributed by Loyd C. Taylor on Aug 8, 2024
     | 493 views

    Humor: Let Me Put It To You Like This As a young boy, while in a country store on a chilly Fall morning, my dad and I stopped in for a few items. Looking straight ahead, I saw my first Potbelly stove, I was fascinated by it. Some older men were sitting around it chatting, a couple were playing ...read more

  • Memorizing & Studying Bible Low Priorities George ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 5, 2006
    based on 5 ratings
     | 3,001 views

    Memorizing & Studying Bible Low Priorities George Barna Research reports "Our most recent surveys indicate that about half of all adult Amerocans listen to preaching or Bible teaching in a typical week." Although 1 out of 3 read the Bible during the week, only 1 out of 10 claim to study the Bible ...read more

  • Troubling Moral Climate: Americans Are Troubled ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 27, 2006
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,750 views

    Troubling Moral Climate: Americans are troubled by our moral climate, according to the Gallup Poll’s “morality meter” 59% are somewhat (29%) or very (30%) dissatisfied with the U.S. moral and ethical climate — which includes a wide range of issues: sexual and violent content in television and ...read more

  • A Prerequisite To Forgiveness  PRO

    Contributed by Dana Chau on Jun 25, 2002
    based on 46 ratings
     | 7,760 views

    A PREREQUISITE TO FORGIVENESS A pastor finished his message early one Sunday, (and that pastor was not me) and he wanted to check his congregation’s understanding. So he asked, "Can anyone tell me what you must do before you can obtain forgiveness of sin?" There was a short pause and then, from ...read more

  • There Is Much Misunderstanding About What ...

    Contributed by David Scudder on Jul 19, 2007
     | 3,066 views

    There is much misunderstanding about what forgiveness really means. Like the story about a pastor who visited a man who had been active in the church, but, due to a dispute with a fellow member, he had stopped coming to church. He reasoned with him at length about the need for forgiveness and ...read more

  • Three Weeks After Her Wedding Day, Joanna Called ...  PRO

    Contributed by Kent Kessler on Aug 30, 2007
    based on 7 ratings
     | 2,320 views

    Three weeks after her wedding day, Joanna called her minister in hysterics. She was crying, “Pastor, John and I had our first fight together! It was awful. What am I going to do?" The pastor, leaning back in his chair and shaking his head said, "Calm down, Joanna, this isn’t nearly as bad as you ...read more

  • Depressed ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 16, 2009
     | 2,593 views

    DEPRESSED TEENS More than two million U.S. teens have suffered a serious bout of depression in the past year, including nearly 13% of girls, finds a Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration report. On average, 8.5% of youth 12-17 admit to having a major depressive episode in the ...read more

  • Dry Truth Or Dynamic Lies?

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Apr 26, 2010
     | 2,178 views

    DRY TRUTH OR DYNAMIC LIES? During my first year of ministry here, I asked a hypothetical question: If you had the choice of attending a church where the pastor believed and taught the Bible but was dry and not a very good speaker, or a church where the pastor believed that the Bible contained many ...read more

  • Oh, Hosanna  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 20, 2011
    based on 5 ratings
     | 6,907 views

    OH, HOSANNA On a Palm Sunday some time ago, 5-year-old Stephanie sat on her aunt’s lap while they listened to the pastor’s sermon together. He described Jesus’ approach to Jerusalem and how the crowds cried, "Hosanna, Hosanna!" At that, Stephanie perked up and began to sing, "Oh, Hosanna, now ...read more

  • God's Will And The Tablecloth

    Contributed by John Perry on Apr 8, 2010
     | 2,659 views

    GOD'S WILL AND THE TABLECLOTH It happened in 1948, just a few days before Christmas. A flash flood ravaged a small town, leaving a gaping hole in the wall of an old church building--right behind the pulpit. The young pastor knew there was no time to fix the damage and decided to make the best of ...read more