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In Sermon Illustrations: "Need For Christ"

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  • Super Stupid Easter Jokes  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 22, 2005
    based on 14 ratings
     | 8,544 views

    SUPER STUPID EASTER JOKES Boy 1: "How did you get that bruise on your arm?" Boy 2: "I ate some Easter candy." Boy 1: "Eating Easter candy won’t give you a bruise." 7 Boy 2: "It will if it’s your big brother’s candy!" Q: What would you get if you crossed the Easter Bunny with an overstressed ...read more

  • One Other Comment I Would Like To Make About ...  PRO

    Contributed by Peter Amerman on May 25, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 2,110 views

    One other comment I would like to make about Miriam’s leadership. I believe that we as a church need to affirm and draw out the gifts of leadership in more of the women in our church. God commended the leadership of Moses and Aaron together with the leadership of Miriam. In contrast with other ...read more

  • God Ain't Dead

    Contributed by Tim Zingale on Jun 26, 2006
    based on 2 ratings
     | 4,801 views

    A pastor wrote: "Some time ago I saw a picture of an old burned-out mountain shack. All that remained was the chimney...the charred debris of what had been that family’s sole possession. In front of this destroyed home stood an old grandfather-looking man dressed only in his underclothes with a ...read more

  • In The Glovebox Of Most Every Car In Our Parking ...

    Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Nov 13, 2006
     | 945 views

    In the glovebox of most every car in our parking lot this morning, besides your registration and proof of insurance, there’s a book – a small book maybe ¾” thick. If you go to change your oil, it tells you what kind and how much to put in. It tells you what pressure to have in your tires, and how ...read more

  • Comedian Carl Hurley Tells The Story About Trying ...

    Contributed by D. Greg Ebie on Nov 16, 2006
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,471 views

    Comedian Carl Hurley tells the story about trying to throw a trash can away. He said it’s the one thing you can’t get the garbage man to pick up. He said, I set an old rusty garbage can out at the street one morning thinking the garbage man would understand that it needed to be thrown away. He ...read more

  • These Are Actual Answering Machine Answers ...

    Contributed by Terry Blankenship on Apr 4, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,038 views

    These are actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the world-famous International Institute of Answering Machine Answers *Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They ...read more

  • Can You Be Kind When You Put Your Mind To It?  PRO

    Contributed by Scott Chambers on Jan 24, 2003
    based on 32 ratings
     | 2,267 views

    Can you be kind when you put your mind to it? December 26 is a legal holiday in both Canada and Great Britain. Come on America, join the crowd. Today is "Boxing Day" in some parts of the world. No, it’s not a day to honor George Foreman and his cronies. Rather, it’s a day to show kindness to those ...read more

  • The Church That Is Alive And Well Is A Growing ...  PRO

    Contributed by Karl Ingersoll on Mar 8, 2003
    based on 72 ratings
     | 3,974 views

    The church that is alive and well is a growing one. Where there is no growth there is a problem. Some churches have parking problems, some other churches don’t. Some churches have kids running around making a lot of noise some other churches tend to be very quiet. Some churches usually have ...read more

  • There Was A Tenant In An Apartment Building Who ...  PRO

    Contributed by David Yarbrough on Mar 24, 2003
    based on 120 ratings
     | 3,061 views

    There was a tenant in an apartment building who was a widow woman who loved God dearly. Her landlord on the other hand despised God and her faith. One day she ran out of food and money and with no one to help she turned to God in prayer. She prayed, “Oh dear God please help me in my time of ...read more

  • Moral Decision

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 31, 2003
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,335 views

    What would be your moral decision on this? Updated 6:33 AM ET May 29, 2003 - Sometimes crime can pay, even on death row, if you’re in need of a new kidney. Thanks to the state of Oregon, a law-abiding citizen in need of a kidney transplant may have to die so that death-row prisoner Horacio ...read more

  • Dick Alexander, Raw  PRO

    Contributed by Steve Malone on Apr 15, 2004
    based on 12 ratings
     | 1,790 views

    Dick Alexander, Raw It’s a word I never liked Raw carrots are too hard Raw oysters too slimy Raw humor is too dirty Raw skin is too painful In fact raw applied to anything human sounds painful But we live in a world of raw human need It’s all around us Do you ever wonder how many people struggle ...read more

  • A Man Went To The Doctor After Weeks Of Symptoms. ...  PRO

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Aug 31, 2004
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,597 views

    A man went to the doctor after weeks of symptoms. The doctor examined him carefully, then called the patient’s wife into his office. “Your husband is suffering from a rare form of anemia. Without treatment, he’ll be dead in a few weeks. The good news is, it can be treated with proper nutrition.” ...read more

  • When I Was 15, I Was Serious About Playing The ...

    Contributed by Mark Adams on Jan 1, 2005
     | 1,905 views

    When I was 15, I was serious about playing the guitar. I had my dad’s old one, but I wanted to get a better one. I had my eye on a yellow Gibson Explorer. I mowed grass all summer and saved and saved, and calculated that I only needed $30.11 to have enough to get that guitar. My dad had a best ...read more

  • Jim Cymbala Discusses The Importance Of Prayer In ...  PRO

    Contributed by Michael Mccartney on Jan 16, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 6,708 views

    Jim Cymbala discusses the importance of prayer in his new book Break Through Prayer: He states, "Everywhere I travel, I keep hearing the defensive teaching that fervent prayer, heartfelt prayer is really overrated and not necessary today. Since God is love, some people reason, we just have to ...read more

  • New Sick Leave Policy  PRO

    Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Jun 4, 2007
    based on 3 ratings
     | 1,699 views

    New Sick Leave Policy 1. SICKNESS: No excuse. We will no longer accept your doctor’s statement as proof, as we believe that if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work. 2. LEAVE OF ABSENCE (for an operation): We are no longer allowing this practice. We wish to discourage any ...read more

  • These Are Actual Answering Machine Answers ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,407 views

    These are actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the world-famous International Institute of Answering Machine Answers *Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They ...read more

  • Judge Robert Bork, Who Was Nominated For The ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 7 ratings
     | 1,902 views

    Judge Robert Bork, who was nominated for the Supreme by President Ronald Reagan in 1987 wrote a book a few years ago entitled: Slouching towards Gomorrah. In that book Bork says, that the forces of evil are so deeply entrenched that any cultural shifts will only be superficial unless they are ...read more

  • In Genesis 35, After Jacob's Daughter Dinah Was ...

    Contributed by Mel Shepherd on Jul 1, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,331 views

    In Genesis 35, after Jacob’s daughter Dinah was raped by a Hivite named Shechem and Jacob’s sons took matters into their own hands by killing the people that had done this, in chapter 35, God gave this advice to Jacob because he was bitter with his sons, Simeon and Levi for destroying his ...read more

  • A Want Is Something I Would Like To Have, ...

    Contributed by R. David Reynolds on Sep 16, 2007
     | 667 views

    A want is something I would like to have, something I may wish or long for, something that I find desirable, but it is not something that I must absolutely have. I can live without having all my wants supplied, but all my needs must be met. Some personal examples quickly come to my mind. I had ...read more

  • This Past Week I Went Up To Visit Oscar Norris. ...

    Contributed by Brian Matherlee on Oct 2, 2007
     | 641 views

    This past week I went up to visit Oscar Norris. Oscar, who is blind, has been keeping really busy. He lives with his niece who loves to quilt and weave. Everything is made truly by hand. She makes her own dyes from nature. She takes wool from sheep and spins her own yarn. In years past Oscar ...read more