Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
A schoolteacher was giving a lesson in fractions. "Johnny, suppose there were seven in your family -- five children and mother and father --a total of seven. And suppose there was pie for dessert. What fraction of the pie would you get?" Johnny answered, "One-sixth." "But you don’t understand,"
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
When my daughter, Shannon, was five years old, she came into the kitchen just a few minutes before supper asking, "May I have a Twinkie" please?" I replied, "No! Supper will be served in just a few minutes."
Shannon began to moan and dance around, now demanding a Twinkie since she was STARVING!
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
Rosanna P. Smith said, After picking up our three-year-old on her first day of nursery school, my husband left the following message on my voice mail at work:
"Hi, honey. The good news is that Amanda got through her first day at school. The bad news is the teacher wants to meet with us.
"The good
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Aug 25, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 2,944 views
Kids are say some of the greatest things. One child complained to his grandpa, "I don't get it. Every time mom says that she can't take anymore and is worn
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Church Of God
Contributed by Ferdinand Funk on Sep 26, 2008
Last Sunday as we were driving to church Our teenage son leaned over from the back seat gave his mother a kiss on the cheek and said, “Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!”
My wife objected, “But it’s not Mother’s Day today – that’s
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Mennonite
based on 1 rating
| 3,217 views
MOM IS AMAZING
When I was small, I always thought my mother was omniscient because she knew where everything was. I’d say, "Mom, where are my mitts?" And she’d say, "They’re under the bed" just like that. When I looked, there they were.
As I grew older, I realized she wasn't omniscient; she just
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 6 ratings
| 2,997 views
There is a story about four preachers discussing the merits of the various translations of the Bible. One liked the King James Version best because of its simple, beautiful English. Another liked the American Revised Version best because it was closer to the original Hebrew and Greek. Still another
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 2,346 views
The late Erma Bombeck tells of God in the act of creating mothers. She says that on the day God created mothers He had already worked long overtime. And an angel said to Him, “Lord, you sure are spending a lot of time on this one.”
The Lord turned and said, “Have you read the specs on this model?
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
When Robert Ingersoll, the notorious agnostic, was in his heyday, two college students went to hear him lecture. As they walked down the street after the lecture, one said to the other, "Well, I guess he knocked the props out from under Christianity, didn’t the?" The other said, "No, I don’t think
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 8 ratings
| 3,341 views
ODE TO MOM (from Pearl Sewell and Patti Cowell).
POSITION: Mother, Mom, Mama
JOB DESCRIPTION: Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable
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Contributed by Jim Blevins on May 14, 2009
Let me just say that when in my mother's house, you do not have to worry about ever moving if you don't want too. I grew up not doing anything around the house. Oh, I worked outside some but my mom was a perfectionist and still is, so we kids never had to do anything because we exploited her desire
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Jim Blevins on May 16, 2009
based on 1 rating
| 4,221 views
One Mother’s Day I was preaching in another state and during the Sunday School class I told about one of the two times that I sassed my mother. Now my mother is about 4 foot 11 inches tall and I was approaching 6 foot so I towered over her. She had told me to do something and I told her she wasn’t
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Independent/Bible
Dr. Benjamin Carson would agree listen to what he says about his mom:
Dr. Benjamin Carson, renowned surgeon at John Hopkins, has a story told about his mother by Kevin Lemam. Mrs. Carson insisted that Ben and His brother Curtis write a book report every couple of weeks. This wasn’t for school-this
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Rick White states:
Today is mother’s day and we have the joy of honoring our mom’s on this special day. For some it is a day filled with all kinds of emotions because of the special relationships that we have to our mothers.For some the word mother, conjures up images of June Cleaver, complete with
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
based on 9 ratings
| 2,892 views
TEN SIGNS OF A FRUSTRATED MOTHER
1. Your children know how to read HTML code but can’t operate a vacuum cleaner.
2. Your children tell you that you said "yes" and you don’t even remember the question.
3. You go to the grocery store and find yourself having a good time.
4. Your husband asks how
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Denomination:
Baptist