based on 1 rating
| 583 views
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ‘I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.’
The driver says, ‘Oh my, officer I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.’
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says, ‘Now don’t be silly dear, you
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Be Fishers of Men … You catch ‘em, He’ll clean ‘em.
A family altar can alter a family.
A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.
Don’t put a question mark where God put a period.
Don’t wait for six strong men to take you to church.
Exercise daily. Walk with the Lord!
Forbidden fruits
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Anglican
Contributed by Brent Zastrow on Mar 16, 2001
based on 199 ratings
| 6,024 views
It is said that Cyrus, the founder of the Persian Empire, once had captured a prince
and his family. When they came before him, the monarch asked the prisoner, "What will
you give me if I release you?" "The half of my wealth," was his reply. "And if I release
your children?" "Everything I possess."
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sermon Central on May 20, 2001
based on 111 ratings
| 2,557 views
Two frogs fell into a deep cream bowl;
The one was wise, and a cheery soul.
The other one took a gloomy view
And bade his friend a sad adieu.
Said the other frog with a merry grin,
"I can’t get out, but I won’t give in;
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Contributed by Robert Travis on Jul 19, 2001
based on 217 ratings
| 3,364 views
IT COMES BACK TO YOU
Have you ever heard this expression, "It’s enough to make a preacher cuss." It reminds me of story about little boy trying to sell a lawn mower. The local pastor walked up and he was able to persuade him to buy the worn out lawn mower. The pastor pulled on the rope several
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Baptist
Contributed by Brian La Croix on Oct 3, 2001
based on 157 ratings
| 1,697 views
Not only does He forgive, He removes them from the equation. Think for just a minute about a globe. You are travelling north, up through Canada, and up to the Arctic Circle.
At what point do you begin going south? When you get to the North Pole.
Now think about going west through California,
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Wesleyan
Contributed by Philip Cairns on Feb 1, 2002
Nelson Mandela was recently interviewed on Oprah. It was a great interview. Oprah asked him the question - "What was the #1 reason for your success - keeping sane in prison, remaining humble as a leader?" Mandela’s answer was strong and unequivocal - the most important thing, much more important
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Holiness
Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 15, 2002
based on 22 ratings
| 2,352 views
Daniel Boone explored the great wilderness of Tennessee and Kentucky. It was Boone who marked the wilderness road that brought settlers into the new land. He often wandered over vast areas of forest, living off the land and dodging arrows. Once he was asked if he had ever bee lost. He replied,
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Contributed by Jerry Falwell on Mar 27, 2002
based on 2 ratings
| 1,913 views
The Los Angeles Times carried an article in 1995 with the title, “Things My Mother Told Me” that suggested:
1. Mind your manners and always write “thank you” notes.
2. Brush your hair.
3. Appearance matters.
4. Never marry a man in order to change him.
5. Stand up straight and clean your
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on May 30, 2002
based on 1 rating
| 3,174 views
WORKING HARD?
Workers around America frankly admit that they spend more than 20 percent of their time (seven hours a week) at work goofing off. That amounts to a four-day work week across the nation. Almost half of Americans admit to chronic malingering, calling in sick when not sick, and doing
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 10, 2002
based on 7 ratings
| 2,276 views
Common Lies
The check is in the mail. I'll start my diet tomorrow. We service what we sell. Give me your number and the doctor will call you right back. Money cheerfully refunded. One size fits all. This offer limited to the first 100 people who call in. Your luggage isn't lost, it's only
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 21, 2003
based on 4 ratings
| 1,112 views
(Story told by Shari Hanson) My mother was baby-sitting my son, Dirk, at her house one day. When I stopped to pick him up, Mom told me that Dirk had followed her into the bedroom as she put some things away in the closet. “Grandma,” he asked, “what room is this?” “This is a closet, Dirk,” she
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Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Oct 19, 2003
based on 8 ratings
| 2,393 views
In the novel Moby Dick Captain Ahab is frightened by what he sees in himself. He asks the question that many of us have asked: “What is it, what nameless, inscrutable, unearthly thing is it; what cozening, hidden lord and master, and cruel, remorseless emperor commands me; that against all natural
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Methodist
Contributed by Davon Huss on Oct 27, 2003
In 1925, Betty Stam said, “Lord, I give up my own purposes and plans, all my own desires, hopes, and ambitions, and accept Thy will for my life. I give myself, my life, my all utterly to Thee, to be Thine forever. I had over to Thy keeping all of my friendships; all the people whom I love are to
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Christian/Church Of Christ
based on 6 ratings
| 2,869 views
An American, British and Filipino pastor got talking about giving money to God. The American pastor says: "when God tells me so, I just empty my wallet in the collection plate." The British pastor is quite impressed with this impulsive but charitable attitude of his American colleague and is
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Baptist
based on 3 ratings
| 2,477 views
A church member went to his pastor, Phillips Brooks, to tell him he was going to the Holy Land. He said that it was his intention to visit Mount Sinai. "In fact," the man told the minister, "I plan to climb to the top of that mountain and when I get there read aloud the Ten Commandments."
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational