Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 2 ratings
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I want to close by sharing the Devil’s Beatitudes with you.
1. Blessed are those who are too tired, too busy, too distracted to spend even an hour once a week with their fellow Christians – they are my best workers.
2. Blessed are those Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked --
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Contributed by Bill Butsko on Jul 27, 2008
BOUGHT TO BE FREED
A young girl was being sold at auction one day. She was a beautiful girl, tall and slender. The bidding was keen, and quickly mounted higher and higher until at last only two men were left bidding for her ownership: the one a low, uncouth foul-mouthed fellow who raised his bid
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Christian Church
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on Mar 20, 2007
Bill Bright, founder and president, Campus Crusade for Christ - I know two law partners who used to hate each other. When one became a Christian, he asked me, "Now that I’m a Christian, what should I do?" I said, "Why not ask him to forgive you and tell him you love him?" "I could never do that!"
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Mark Hodges on Jun 14, 2001
based on 82 ratings
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A young boy was overheard asking his playmate, "Wouldn’t you hate to wear glasses all the time?" "No," came the answer, "not if I had some like my grandma’s. She always sees when people are tired or sad, and she knows just what to do to make them feel better. One day I asked her how she could see
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Baptist
Contributed by Richard Burkey on May 19, 2005
based on 21 ratings
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Some Things To Be Thankful For This Thanksgiving.
1. Be thankful for automatic dishwashers. They make it possible to get out of the kitchen before the family come in for their after-dinner snacks.
2. Be thankful for husbands who attack small repair jobs around the house. They usually make them big
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Lutheran
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 9, 2009
based on 1 rating
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THE GRAY AREA
I heard a story about a 90-year-old grandfather who was complaining to his grandson about getting old. He said, "The worst part is the diapers." He continued, "I don’t mind wearin’ them, it’s just the name I hate. Depends! If I have to wear a diaper, I don’t want there to be any
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There’s a story about two rabbis in the Talmud, Hillel and Shammai. Hillel was patient and understanding, and more conceptual than his counterpart, Shammai, who was an engineer, or mathematician, in his mindset. According to the story, a gentile went to Shammai and said he would convert to Judaism
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Episcopal/Anglican
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Sep 13, 2008
Maybe you heard about the wife that went down to the police station with her next door neighbor to report her husband was missing. The police officer asks for his description. So she told the officer, “Well, he’s 6 foot 2, blond, blue eyes, 35 years old, 185 pounds, great smile, wonderful with kids
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Baptist
The tax farmers in Israel, here called tax-collectors, were somewhat different from IRS agents. They were more like Mafia enforcers, employing thugs to shake down local citizens and merchants. The Romans specified how much each tax man was supposed to pay them, and the architelōē or
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Catholic
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The only kind of Jesus we have ever seen with our own eyes is a man playing the role. A few of our men have portrayed the suffering Jesus in our Easter presentation. They did a wonderful job, but they were only playing the part; the blood was stage makeup, and the nails were not really piercing
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United Methodist
Contributed by John Sears on Jul 22, 2011
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WISH THEY WERE ON OUR TEAM
I played a football when I was in Jr. High School. There was one week of practice that I hated. It was the week we practiced against the High school team. Folks, they were better. They were bigger, stronger, faster, and more experienced. They beat up on us all
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Christian Church
The two books the devil hates most are Genesis and Revelation. Why?
• In Genesis the devil's doom is pronounced.
• In Revelation it’s carried out. It is the Devil's Obituary.
Satan would tell us Genesis is myth and Revelation is mystery—don't pay attention to either one! Did you
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Alison Bucklin on Jun 24, 2023
If but some vengeful god would call to me
From up the sky, and laugh: “Thou suffering thing,
Know that thy sorrow is my ecstasy,
That thy love's loss is my hate's profiting!”
Then would I bear it, clench myself, and die,
Steeled by the sense of ire unmerited;
Half-eased in that a
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Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Derek Jones on Feb 13, 2004
based on 4 ratings
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When I was 17 years of age I broke my mother’s heart. She had always taken us to church but by the time I was 15 or so, I lost interest. During the next couple of years I wandered farther and farther from the God who so passionately loved and sought me.
Then one night, after an evening of
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Baptist
Contributed by David Johnston on Sep 24, 2006
based on 2 ratings
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On a cold winter evening a man suffered a heart attack and after being admitted to the hospital, asked the nurse to call his daughter. He explained, "You see, I live alone and she is the only family I have." The nurse went to phone the daughter. The daughter was quite upset and shouted, "You must
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
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