In Sermon Illustrations: "funny" showing 321-338 of 338

A Switch In Time On My Behind

Contributed by James Snyder on Apr 2, 2022

Recently, I was reminded of my father’s passing 12 years ago. It’s funny how time quickly goes by, and then something happens to remind you of the past. When I was growing up, spankings were normal. And, for someone like me, those spankings were quite regular. Today my father would be arrested for ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 22:6

Tags: Humor, Discipline

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Doctors Are Always Right

Contributed by James Snyder on May 21, 2022

Last year I suffered what is referred to as a heart attack. I got to the hospital in time, so there was no any major damage. I had one artery known as the "Widow Maker" that was 90% blocked, which seemed to be a very serious thing. Who knew I even had a heart, but doctors are always ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 6:9

Tags: Doctors, Medical

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

To Ask Or Not Ask Is No Option

Contributed by James Snyder on Jul 23, 2022

You would think I would have learned all I needed to learn at my age. However, each day I learn something I did not know the day before. So much of my new learning is still connected to being married to The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. I know, for example, that she is not soliciting ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 5:14

Tags: Questions, Harmony

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Sir Forgets-A-Lot To The Rescue

Contributed by James Snyder on Sep 17, 2022

Contrary to the idea that the older you get, the more you forget, it has never been my experience. I have forgotten things for as long as I can remember. I even forget things that never actually happened. It runs in our family, though it came to me legitimately down through the generations. A nut ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 8:12

Tags: Blessing, Forgetting

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Oh, Memory, How I Miss Thee

Contributed by James Snyder on Sep 16, 2023

Dr. James L. Snyder Driving home from a luncheon with friends, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage asked me a stunning question. She is a specialist regarding questions I can’t answer. I am trying to evade her questions and have been very good up until now. “Did that story you told really ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 10:6-7, 1 Peter 3:10-11

Tags: Memory, Lying

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

So What If I’m Crazy?

Contributed by James Snyder on Aug 17, 2024

The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and her wonderful husband are celebrating 53 years of marital bliss this year. What an accomplishment! It doesn’t seem possible that we have been married 53 years. After all, we don’t look that old! At least she doesn’t. It’s amazing how time flies; if ...read more

Scripture: Amos 3:3

Tags: Unity, Relationships, Crazy

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Go With The Flow  PRO

Contributed by Hal Seed on Feb 12, 2008

6. YOU TRUST HIM WITH WHATEVER IS TROUBLING YOU. Anybody having anything trouble you these days? It’s probably part of God’s sense of humor that I went on a whale-watching trip this week, the week we start learning about Jonah. PICTURE OF WHALE TALE I’ve been on whale-watching tours only twice ...read more

Scripture: Luke 14:18-19

Tags: Authority

Denomination: Baptist

Go With The Flow

Contributed by Hal Seed on Feb 12, 2008

6. YOU TRUST HIM WITH WHATEVER IS TROUBLING YOU. Anybody having anything trouble you these days? It’s probably part of God’s sense of humor that I went on a whale-watching trip this week, the week we start learning about Jonah. PICTURE OF WHALE TALE I’ve been on whale-watching tours only twice ...read more

Tags: Gratitude

Denomination: Baptist

The Rich Fool

Contributed by Revd. Martin Dale on Nov 22, 2008

THE RICH FOOL Ortberg writes (and I have abridged it and translated it into proper English) Once upon a time in the Silicon Valley, there lived a very important man.He routinely logged in 12-14 hours a day work and sometimes at weekends. He went to the Harvard School of Management, where he got ...read more

Scripture: Luke 12:13-21

Tags: Fool

Denomination: Anglican

Great Quotes On Forgiveness

Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Apr 10, 2022

When everything in you wants to hold a grudge, point a finger and remember the pain. God wants you to lay it aside. Why? Because, when you release it, you will be set free. - R.T. Kendall Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free and realizing that you were the prisoner. - Max ...read more

Tags: Forgiving Others, Forgiveness

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

I’m So Poor I Can’t Pay Attention

Contributed by James Snyder on Mar 25, 2023

Occasionally I go to my computer and search for the wealthiest preachers in America. I am curious to know who came up with this idea, but I check it out occasionally to see who they are. As often as I have checked this information, I have never found my name on that list. I so much wanted to see ...read more

Scripture: 1 Timothy 6:9-10

Tags: Rich, Poor, Wealth

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

These Old Bones Of Mine

Contributed by James Snyder on May 20, 2023

I had a frightening experience the other day. I know I must be getting old because things that never frightened me before frighten me. I also see things I never saw before. Going into the bathroom one morning, I looked in the mirror, and my grandfather looked back at me. I almost passed out. With ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 51:8, Psalm 34:20

Tags: Joy, Humor, Age, Bones

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

From Roast Turkey To Reindeer

Contributed by James Snyder on Dec 9, 2023

Nothing is more confusing than being in the middle of two holidays. I have just finished Thanksgiving, and now Christmas is before me. Each year, it gets more difficult to adjust to the next holiday. It’s hard for me to keep up. For months, the focus was on that roast turkey for Thanksgiving. And ...read more

Scripture: Amos 3:3

Tags: Reindeer, Thanksgiving, Turkey, Christmas

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Making Decisions Is The Hardest Part Of My Life

Contributed by James Snyder on Feb 3, 2024

If it were not for decisions, my life would be perfect. After all these years, I still wrestle with decision-making. I admit that I often don’t make good decisions. I'm not sure, so don't repeat this, but I think The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage knows this and uses it to her ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 3:5-6

Tags: Decisions, Choices

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

As If I Didn’t Already Know

Contributed by James Snyder on Oct 12, 2024

I've been accused of many things throughout my life, but never having a great memory. It's not that I don't try to remember things; I can't remember things I'm supposed to remember. It has nothing to do with my age because it started as far back as I can remember. This ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 139:23-24

Tags: Memory, Relationship

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

We Get A New Family  PRO

Contributed by Brian La Croix on Feb 20, 2008

#3 – We Get a New Family Ephesians 2:19-22 November 4, 2007 NOTE: THE ME/WE/GOD/YOU/WE FORMAT USED IN MY MESSAGES IS BORROWED FROM ANDY STANLEY’S BOOK, "COMMUNICATING FOR A CHANGE." Introduction We’ve been looking at different benefits or blessings of following Christ – living for Him, and not ...read more

Tags: Faith, Thanksgiving, Blessing, Revival

Denomination: Wesleyan

Carta De Satánas (Translation Follows)

Contributed by Rolando Delgado on Sep 22, 2010

CARTA DE SATÁNAS (Translation follows) Te vi ayer cuando comenzabas tus tareas diarias. Te levantaste sin ni siquiera orar a tu "Dios". En todo el día no hiciste nada de oración; de hecho, ni recordaste bendecir tus alimentos. Eres muy desagradecido con tu Dios, y eso me gusta de ti. También me ...read more

Tags: Disciplines General

Denomination: Pentecostal

In God's Eyes," By Candace Carteen Of Portland, ...  PRO

Contributed by Brian Atwood on May 5, 2008

"In God's Eyes," by Candace Carteen of Portland, Oregon. By the time I was ten, I was totally ashamed of my father. All my friends called him names: Quasi-Moto, hunchback, monster, little Frankenstein, the crooked little man with the crooked little cane. At first it hurt when they called him ...read more

Tags: Faults

Denomination: Baptist