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In Sermon Illustrations: "Funny Stories"

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  • The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe." Let Me ...

    Contributed by Steven Simala Grant on May 2, 2003
    based on 1 rating
     | 14,904 views

    “The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe.” Let me repeat just a portion here: “Oh Children,” said the Lion, “I feel my strength coming back to me. Oh, children, catch me if you can!” He stood still for a second, his eyes very bright, his limbs quivering, lashing himself with his tail. Then he ...read more

  • Many People Have Trouble With The Concept Of ...  PRO

    Contributed by Lou Nicholes on Nov 22, 2004
    based on 7 ratings
     | 3,531 views

    Many people have trouble with the concept of total depravity. While not denying they are sinners, many people feel that their sin isn’t bad enough to condemn them. What they don’t understand is that any sin is wholly unacceptable to God. Let’s suppose I invite you over to my house this Saturday ...read more

  • I Think As Christians We're Not Always Aware Of ...

    Contributed by Bradley Kellum on Sep 8, 2009
     | 1,982 views

    I think as Christians we’re not always aware of all that God has given to us. I think this is one reason why we struggle with feelings of discontent so much. We’re like the lady who saved and saved her money for years until she finally had enough to pay for an expensive cruise. All week, while ...read more

  • How Not To Get Out Of ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 11, 2009
     | 3,802 views

    How Not To Get Out of Problems When the preacher’s car broke down on a country road, he walked to a nearby roadhouse to use the phone. After calling for a tow truck, he spotted his old friend, Frank, drunk and shabbily dressed at the bar. "What happened to you, Frank?" asked the good reverend. "You ...read more

  • The Durability Test

    Contributed by Antonio Silveira on Jan 8, 2011
    based on 1 rating
     | 6,308 views

    THE DURABILITY TEST Endurance is a quality that God expects us to manifest. If you go to an IKEA store, you will find somewhere in the chair department a glass box with what is called the durability test. They have a mechanism that simulates someone sitting on the chair, and they say the chair was ...read more

  • Know Who You Are Fighting

    Contributed by Steve Kinnard on Feb 15, 2019
     | 3,779 views

    The Nature of Our Enemy One of the foremost rules of warfare is: know your enemy. The more you know about your enemy-how he thinks, what motivates him-the better you are able to devise a means of counteracting his moves and defeating him. To overcome the enemy of our eternal spirit, the devil, the ...read more

  • The Leo Burnett Advertising Agency ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,439 views

    Illustration: The Leo Burnett advertising agency did a nationwide telephone survey a few years ago on lying, cataloging when we lie, how we lie and why we lie. The results were interesting. Ninety-one percent of all Americans confessed that they regularly lied… One out of every five admitted that ...read more

  • This Past Week I Went Up To Visit Oscar Norris. ...

    Contributed by Brian Matherlee on Oct 2, 2007
     | 623 views

    This past week I went up to visit Oscar Norris. Oscar, who is blind, has been keeping really busy. He lives with his niece who loves to quilt and weave. Everything is made truly by hand. She makes her own dyes from nature. She takes wool from sheep and spins her own yarn. In years past Oscar ...read more

  • There Was A Little Fellow Who Was Returning Home ...

    Contributed by Scott Carroll on Mar 8, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,939 views

    There was a little fellow who was returning home from a store with a pail of honey in his hand. A gentleman who walked beside him saw him slip one finger down into the pail. Then, because his mother had told him never to wipe his sticky fingers on his blouse or trousers, it found its only logical ...read more

  • Six-Word Memoirs  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Sasnett on Jan 19, 2009
    based on 5 ratings
     | 2,574 views

    Six-Word Memoirs One of the surprising best-selling books of 2008 is "Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure." Notice that the main title is only six words: "Not Quite What I Was Planning." People were asked to succinctly sum up their life in six ...read more

  • Hey! Get Your Own!

    Contributed by Jonathan Spurlock on Nov 19, 2019
     | 2,917 views

    A few years ago, my wife and I were on vacation, traveling through a Midwestern state. Supper time was getting near, so we thought we’d get a drive-through meal. She wanted an ice cream cone so, I ordered one for her. The young lady working at the drive through window gave me the cone, and I handed ...read more

  • The Tithe Belongs To God!

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 13, 2022
     | 2,625 views

    You don’t give the tithe, you return it back to God. It belongs to Him! There is a cartoon that shows four frames! 1. In the first frame a man looks at a new car! The salesman says, "10% down and low, low payments for 48 months." The man asks, "Where do I sign?" 2. In the ...read more

  • The Golden Calf

    Contributed by John Bright on Apr 6, 2025
     | 269 views

    In Exodus 32, the people are complaining that Moses has been gone for too long. They go to Aaron and say, “Make us a god.” To this, Aaron replies, “NO WAY!” Not really, that’s what he should have told them. What really happened: Exodus 32:2 “ And Aaron said to them, “Break off the golden ...read more

  • Bob Shackleford Reworded I Love To The Tell The ...  PRO

    Contributed by Davon Huss on Oct 7, 2002
    based on 5 ratings
     | 1,804 views

    Bob Shackleford reworded I Love to the Tell the Story. I love to tell the story of unseen things below, of people and their problems, each detail do I know. I love to tell the story, someone has said it’s true, to pass it on inspires me, as nothing else could do. I love to tell the story, But if ...read more

  • I Received A Phone Call From A Local Newspaper ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 10, 2004
     | 2,319 views

    I received a phone call from a local newspaper reporter, asking for my opinion on Mel Gibson’s current film, THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST. As I began to share how deeply moved I was by the depictions of Christ’s sufferings in the movie, she turned to a personal question. She explained that she was ...read more

  • The Empty Chair  PRO

    Contributed by Danny Thomas on May 21, 2001
    based on 293 ratings
     | 4,867 views

    The Empty Chair A man’s daughter had asked the local pastor to come and pray with her father. When the pastor arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows and an empty chair beside his bed. The priest assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. ...read more

  • The Empty Chair

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Sep 20, 2006
     | 3,538 views

    Subject: The Empty Chair > > A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come > and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he > found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on > two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed.The minister > assumed that the old fellow had been ...read more

  • Daddy's Empty ...

    Contributed by Johnny Creasong on Aug 28, 2009
     | 3,771 views

    DADDY’S EMPTY CHAIR A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed. The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of ...read more

  • The Persuasion Of A Changed Life

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 18, 2011
     | 7,378 views

    THE PERSUASION OF A CHANGED LIFE The power of your changed life can be very persuasive even to those who refuse to be persuaded by the word itself. Just a few years ago, Decision magazine told the story of Rick and Shawna Pilat, a Winnipeg couple who had recently come to faith in Christ. For ...read more

  • A Man's Daughter Had Asked The Local Minister To ...

    Contributed by Gene Gregory on Jul 18, 2007
     | 1,059 views

    A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed. The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. "I guess you ...read more