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In Sermon Illustrations: "funny christmas" showing 961-980 of 1,660

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  • On An Icy Winter's Night Two Weeks Before ...

    Contributed by Fred Sigle on Dec 20, 2007
     | 2,072 views

    On an ICY winter’s night two weeks before Christmas, 1987, a PREACHER was impatiently waiting at the O’Hare Airport in Chicago. All FLIGHTS has been CANCELED due to FOG and FREEZING RAIN. The TERMINAL was in BEDLAM. Thousands of people were CLUSTERED at the TICKET COUNTERS demanding projected ...read more

  • It Seems That Even The Obvious Things In Life ...  PRO

    Contributed by Travis Fitch on May 15, 2005
    based on 16 ratings
     | 2,648 views

    It seems that even the obvious things in life can¡¦t be taken for granted: After a woman sued McDonalds because she wasn’t warned her coffee was hot, companies are changing their instruction manuals and product warning labels to cover themselves from liability. Listen to a few of these: On a ...read more

  • Nobody Knew He Was Gone

    Contributed by Bret Toman on Jun 15, 2009
     | 1,954 views

    NOBODY KNEW HE WAS GONE The rent hadn’t been paid, so the landlord came knocking. For years, the rent was paid automatically from the tenant’s bank account. But suddenly, there were no funds available and no response from the tenant. When he didn’t come to the door, the landlord let himself in to ...read more

  • Top Ten Ways You Know You're In A Bad Church  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 13, 2004
    based on 8 ratings
     | 3,107 views

    TOP TEN WAYS YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN A BAD CHURCH 10. The church bus has gun racks. 9. The church staff consists of Senior Pastor, Associate Pastor and Socio-pastor. 8. The Bible they use is the "Dr. Seuss Version." 7. There’s an ATM in the lobby. 6. The choir wears leather robes. 5. Worship ...read more

  • A Priest And A Rabbi Are Discussing The Pros And ...  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Mar 30, 2005
    based on 17 ratings
     | 5,895 views

    “A priest and a rabbi are discussing the pros and cons of their various religions, and inevitably the discussion turns to repentance. The rabbi explains Yom Kippur, the solemn Day of Atonement, a day of fasting and penitence, while the priest tells him all about Lent, and its 40 days of ...read more

  • A Blessing Is God's Expression Of Favor On You. ...

    Contributed by Charles Whitmire on Jan 6, 2008
     | 3,826 views

    A blessing is God’s expression of favor on you. In the passage we look at this morning, God commanded his priests to give his people a blessing from him. When I started looking at this passage this week, one image came to mind. It’s sort of funny actually, but a scene from Rocky II came to mind. ...read more

  • Canadian Thanksgiving  PRO

    Contributed by Pat Cook on Oct 2, 2004
    based on 7 ratings
     | 4,248 views

    CANADIAN THANKSGIVING The first North American Thanksgiving is traced back to 1578 when the English navigator Martin Frobisher held a formal ceremony in what is now called Newfoundland. We don’t believe this is when the kissing-of-the-cod tradition began, but there was indeed a great party to give ...read more

  • Time Always Seems Long To The Child Who Is ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 11, 2007
     | 801 views

    "Time always seems long to the child who is waitingfor Christmas, for next summer, for becoming a grownup; long also when he surrenders ...read more

  • In His Book Dare To Believe, Dan Baumann ...

    Contributed by Rev. Roberto D. Abella on Nov 21, 2004
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,772 views

    In his book Dare to Believe, Dan Baumann illustrates the unique experience of knowing that something is ours, yet longing to enjoy it more fully. He explained that at Christmas time he would always do a lot of snooping, trying to find the gift --wrapped presents and figure out what was in them. ...read more

  • Millions Of People Upon This Planet This ...

    Contributed by Aubrey Vaughan on Oct 28, 2006
     | 972 views

    Millions of people upon this planet this Christmas will celebrate with big celebration’s, but they will completly miss the point of the celebrations. Could you imagine returning home to find your house decortated top to bottom with lights and party decorations and when you get to the door you ...read more

  • Children Have A Way Of Controlling Our Life Do ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,793 views

    Children have a way of controlling our life do they not – I heard about a young boy who received a harmonica for Christmas from his uncle. After the first of the year he saw his uncle for the first time since receiving the harmonica. With a large smile he said, “Thanks for the harmonica you gave me ...read more

  • A Flattered Pastor Becomes ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 14, 2009
     | 2,919 views

    A Flattered Pastor Becomes Proud A pastor received a Christmas card with a note in it, from a lady in his congregation. He said she was very complimentary about his preaching and compared him with Chuck Swindoll. She finished by writing, "I think you are one of the really great preachers of all ...read more

  • The World: A Temporary Container

    Contributed by Guy Mcgraw on Jan 3, 2012
     | 2,289 views

    THE WORLD: A TEMPORARY CONTAINER The first garbage day after Christmas must be the biggest garbage day of the year. You can tell what most people got for Christmas by just looking at the garbage pile in front of the house. We usually throw out all the boxes--unless you have children who like to ...read more

  • A Man In Phoenix Called His Son In New York On ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 26, 2007
     | 1,467 views

    A man in Phoenix called his son in New York on Christmas Eve and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; 45 years of misery is enough – I cannot take it any more!” The startled son replies, “Pop what are you talking about, you and mom are so in ...read more

  • Maybe I Can Illustrate This With Something A ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,129 views

    Maybe I can illustrate this with something a little whimsical. God knows we need whimsical in these bleak times I am remembering my grandmother and what a wonderful cook she was. We looked forward to holidays when we would be invited to her house for a delightful meal. But every Thanksgiving, every ...read more

  • The Story Of The Candy Cane

    Contributed by Darrin Fish on Dec 12, 2007
     | 2,642 views

    The story of the candy cane • A Candy maker in Indiana wanted to make a candy that could be used as a witnessing tool, so he made the Christmas Candy Cane. • He incorporated several symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus. • He began with stick of pure white, hard candy. • White to ...read more

  • A Roman Census And Taxing Forced The Town Of ...

    Contributed by Thomas Cash on Dec 10, 2009
     | 1,661 views

    A Roman census and taxing forced the town of Bethlehem to burst at its seams. Neither the locals nor the visitors would have been very happy about the decree. Tempers were short, words were spoken in anger, people were taken advantage of, and rooms were at a premium. Mary was obviously in labor ...read more

  • The Gospel According To… Charlie Brown. Charlie ...

    Contributed by Mark Eberly on Dec 22, 2008
     | 2,695 views

    The Gospel According to… Charlie Brown. Charlie Brown cannot catch a break. He is the stereotypical American loser. Whenever he tries to kick the football that Lucy is holding, every time she pulls it away at the last second and he misses it, flying through the air to land flat on his back. His ...read more

  • Dave Galloway Told Of A Soldier Who Had ...  PRO

    Contributed by Melvin Newland on Jan 3, 2001
    based on 17 ratings
     | 1,314 views

    ILL. Dave Galloway told of a soldier who had just returned from Viet Nam. His parents were socialites, very well-to-do. It was near Christmas, and they were getting ready to go out to the first of the round of parties of the Christmas season. Just then the phone rang, & it was their son on the ...read more

  • There Were Two Seven Year Old Girls That Could ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,737 views

    There were two seven year old girls that could not wait for Christmas. You remember that time in your life when you didn’t sleep much the week before Christmas because of the excitement. These girls felt that excitement, they couldn’t wait to open their presents from the mom and dad. The Christmas ...read more

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