Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 2, 2008
: Children’s message used "Horton Hears a Who" by Dr. Seuss
The children’s message this morning gave us one literary vision of being “neighborly”. Horton, the elephant heard a cry for help and did all in his power (even amid the teasing of his friends) to protect the small people, affirming his
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Did you hear about the lady that was bitten by a skunk with rabies? The doctor came into her room and informed her: "Yes, the skunk had a bad case of rabies, and rabies is a highly contagious disease. You are now infected with rabies."
The doctor told her that rabies was deadly, and there was no
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Denomination:
Assembly Of God
Did you hear about the story of the GREAT ARGUMENT...
FIVE FINGERS GOT TOGETHER AND IN A HEATED DISCUSSION
THE ARGUMENT AROSE: WHO IS THE GREATEST OF THE FIVE
FINGERS?
The THUMB laid his claim: I am the greatest, I am the only opposing digit. I am used to HITCHHIKE.
The INDEX FINGER... I am the
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Denomination:
Assembly Of God
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 2,558 views
"Babies do not want to hear about babies; they like to be told of giants and castles, and of somewhat which can
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 1,990 views
Aunt Lucy was losing her hearing and the doctor recommended surgery to correct it. She promptly vetoed the idea saying, “I’m 94 years old and I’ve already heard enough.”
Mike was watching the last part of the TV show when his Dad called down the basement steps, “Mike Come up for dinner”
Mike
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Contributed by Dave Mcfadden on Jun 16, 2008
Two feet to follow us,
Where ever our feet may trod;
Will they lead to folly’s door,
Or will they lead to God?
Two eyes to observe what we do,
To copy our ways and our tastes;
Will they help build a growing world,
Or will they add to the waste?
Two ear to hear what we say,
In pleasure, in
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Melvin Newland on May 15, 2001
based on 112 ratings
| 5,030 views
Did you hear about the college student who was taking the course in ornithology, which is a study of birds?
This class in ornithology had the reputation of being the most difficult class in the whole curriculum. And the professor was an extremely difficult professor. Everybody feared him.
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
based on 135 ratings
| 3,180 views
I remember hearing a story about a man who was visiting a certain school and made a promise to the tiny students that he would give a prize to the one whose desk was found in the best order when he returned. He gave no indication of when that
might be. Shortly after he left, a little girl, noted
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Andrew Chan on Jul 18, 2001
based on 196 ratings
| 1,820 views
Did you hear about the farmer that decided to buy a chain saw?
A logging foreman sold him one that he guaranteed would cut down 15 trees in a single day.
A week later, a very unhappy farmer came back to report that the power saw must be faulty - it averaged only 3 trees a day. The foreman grabbed
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Denomination:
Evangelical Free
Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Feb 22, 2002
based on 93 ratings
| 2,121 views
We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side.
Now you get to hear the guys’ point of view.
These are our rules!
Please note...these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
based on 5 ratings
| 3,976 views
TEN THINGS A MOM DOESN’T WANT TO HEAR
1. I swallowed a goldfish.
2. Your lipstick works better than crayons.
3. Does grape juice leave a stain???
4. The principal called...
5. But DAD says that word all the time.
6. What’s it cost to fix a window???
7. Has anyone seen my earthworms???
8. I
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Denomination:
Baptist
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