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In Sermon Illustrations: "Dad Jokes"

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  • Just Getting Out Of The Driveway Was A Major Feat ...  PRO

    Contributed by Guy Glass on Mar 26, 2004
    based on 4 ratings
     | 2,183 views

    Just getting out of the driveway was a major feat during last year’s snow and ice storms. One co-worker was relating how he used his seven-year-old son’s baseball bat to smash the slick coat of ice on his driveway. He got cold and went inside for a cup of coffee before attempting to clear the car. ...read more

  • Time, Speed, Dentists

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,368 views

    Illustration- Time, Speed, Dentists The little boy was afraid of the dentist, so his dad decided to set the example and have his teeth examined, too. The dentist looked inside the father’s mouth & said, "There’s a tooth there that has to be pulled." The father asked, "How much will it cost?" The ...read more

  • Be Rich Toward God  PRO

    Contributed by Mark Bauer on Aug 1, 2007
    based on 2 ratings
     | 3,027 views

    Be rich toward God. Grandparents are often accused of spoiling the grandchildren Why? The children see grandpa sitting on the floor playing with his toddler grandchildren. The son or daughter is shocked and jealous: "Dad, I’m surprised. You never got down on the floor and played with ...read more

  • Maybe You Have Been Hit With So Much Adversity ...

    Contributed by Darrin Fish on Dec 10, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,028 views

    • Maybe you have been hit with so much adversity you feel like the little girl who was riding along on her bike when she bumped her head on the low hanging branch of a tree. • She ran into the house hollering, "Mom, Joey hit me!" • Her Mom looked up from what she was doing and said, "Sissy, Joey ...read more

  • Yours, Mine And Ours: Crock-Pot Stepfamilies

    Contributed by Timothy Smith on May 3, 2008
     | 2,183 views

    YOURS, MINE AND OURS: CROCK-POT STEPFAMILIES Video Clip - Yours, Mine and Ours (2005 version) = 3:23 Clip shows husband and wife announcing they were married without telling the children beforehand and shows the children fighting and Dad reacting badly. But the hammer is no answer and no better a ...read more

  • Broken Steel Belts

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Feb 22, 2010
     | 2,758 views

    BROKEN STEEL BELTS It is impossible to be prepared for every error around. When I bought my dad's old car, it had been sitting idle for a year. He had hardly used it; even the tires were original -- nine years old. When I brought it in for a flat tire, the mechanic fixed it and all seemed well. ...read more

  • Going In Circles

    Contributed by Spencer Miller on May 19, 2013
     | 2,348 views

    GOING IN CIRCLES A family who moved into a new neighborhood had a late start one morning. As a result their six-year-old missed her school bus. Though it would make him late for work her father agreed to take her to school if she gave him directions. After 20 minutes of going in circles they ...read more

  • What Is A Mother?  PRO

    Contributed by Jan Spencer on Mar 19, 2002
    based on 71 ratings
     | 4,793 views

    WHAT IS A MOTHER? Somewhere between the youthful energy of a teenager and the golden years of a woman’s life, there lives a marvelous and loving person known as "Mother." A mother is a curious mixture of patience, kindness, understanding, discipline, industriousness, purity and love. A mother ...read more

  • There Is A Crew At Our House In Thomasville. ...

    Contributed by Russell Brownworth on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,247 views

    There is a crew at our house in Thomasville. They’ve been working for the past few months putting two new rooms on the back of our house for Mom and Dad to come live there. Next to the house is a dumpster…it is about 8’ x 25’ and full of scrap wood, shingles, discarded Pepsi bottles and sandwich ...read more

  • Lowell Ogden Tells The Story Of A Little Boy Who ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 34 ratings
     | 3,713 views

    Lowell Ogden tells the story of a little boy who lived out in the country around the turn of the century. He had never seen a traveling circus, and one was coming to his town on Saturday. The lad asked his father for permission to go and his dad said that he could, providing his chores were done ...read more

  • Who Are You?  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 9, 2002
    based on 11 ratings
     | 2,873 views

    WHO ARE YOU? When Don called home from the road one evening, he spoke briefly to his nine-year-old daughter: "Honey, could you get your mommy on the phone?" He then heard Tasha blurt out, as she set the receiver down on the counter: "Hey Mom, the invisible man is on the phone!" In that ...read more

  • Transformed By An Elevator, Citation: Owen ...  PRO

    Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Feb 27, 2003
    based on 65 ratings
     | 3,566 views

    [Transformed by an Elevator, Citation: Owen Bourgaize, Castel, Guernsey, United Kingdom] A family from a remote area was making their first visit to a big city. They checked in to a grand hotel and stood in amazement at the impressive sight. Leaving the reception desk they came to the elevator ...read more

  • A Son's Best Friend, Citation: Jeanette ...  PRO

    Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Aug 22, 2003
    based on 4 ratings
     | 1,813 views

    A Son’s Best Friend, Citation: Jeanette Naaktgeboren, Maple Lake, MN. Christian Reader, "Lite Fare." My three-year-old grandson obviously had food on his mind when he headed for the church kitchen, leading his father by the hand. However, neither his father nor the ladies he approached were ...read more

  • Make More  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 23, 2005
    based on 8 ratings
     | 3,563 views

    MAKE MORE One Saturday, as is the custom at the Erickson house in Peoria, IL, Ken Erickson’s wife cleaned out leftovers from the refrigerator. She gave the one remaining portion of tortellini to their 6-year-old son, Jeremy. Their 8-year-old son, Matthew, also wanted some, so bickering ensued. ...read more

  • Traditional Family Comeback A Myth: Headlines ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 10, 2006
     | 1,702 views

    Traditional Family Comeback A Myth: Headlines claiming women are leaving the workforce to become full-time moms have periodically appeared during recent years, but hard data just doesn’t back it up. The traditional family, with Mom at home full-time while Dad works shrank from 43% in ’80 to 27% in ...read more

  • Religious Families Stronger: A Survey By The ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 27, 2006
    based on 2 ratings
     | 1,797 views

    Religious Families Stronger: A survey by the National Study of Youth and Religion at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill found that youth ages 12 to 14 reared in religious households are more likely than their peers from nonreligious families to admire their mother and father, to not ...read more

  • One Sunday Evening, William Booth Was Walking In ...  PRO

    Contributed by David Ward on Aug 26, 2006
    based on 3 ratings
     | 1,269 views

    One Sunday evening, William Booth was walking in London with his son, Bramwell, who was then 12 or 13 years old. The father surprised the son by taking him to a tavern! The place was crowded with men and women. Some of them were drunk. Some of them were loud. And the air was filled with the smell ...read more

  • Us When We Were Down On Romney Marsh – And He ...

    Contributed by Revd. Martin Dale on Apr 19, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,110 views

    us when we were down on Romney Marsh – and he went for a drive with Maddy. When he came home, he said to me: “Dad, is Mum all right?” “Yes”, I replied “Why do you ask?” “Well”, Jez replied “When we were driving across the Marsh and we came to some black sheep – Mum called them “rainbow “sheep. I ...read more

  • My Older Sister Sue Is Panicked By Mice. She ...

    Contributed by Bruce Rzengota on Dec 26, 2009
     | 2,221 views

    My older sister Sue is panicked by mice. She lives in an old farm house, next door to the house we grew up in. One night she went into her kitchen and saw a mouse scury underneath the pantry door. Wanted it eradicated, she called Dad who went over the house to take care of the problem. He was ...read more

  • Charles Wesley Would Not Be Adopted  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 6, 2010
    based on 2 ratings
     | 4,624 views

    CHARLES WESLEY WOULD NOT BE ADOPTED In 1721, a wealthy Irishman offered to adopt Charles Wesley and make him his legal heir. The 13-year-old boy refused the offer, choosing to continue his way through school under very difficult circumstances. This turned out to be one of the most momentous ...read more