Contributed by Sean Harder on Aug 5, 2011
based on 1 rating
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GIVE GOD THE BIG STUFF, TOO
I am mechanically inept and every once in a while I try to do some mechanical thing. Sometimes it's as simple as trying to put up a light fixture. Inevitably it fights back and doesn't go easily. I start getting frustrated and forcing the issue, usually making it worse.
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 3, 2001
based on 107 ratings
| 3,579 views
“…wickedness, when you examine it, turns out to be the pursuit of some good in the wrong way. You can be good for the mere sake of goodness: you cannot be bad for the mere sake of badness. You can do a kind action when you are not feeling kind and when it gives you no pleasure, simply because
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A vicar was retiring after 25 years in the parish. As he came to clear out his bedroom, he found a small bowl with 5 eggs and £1,000 in it. Baffled he called his wife, "Darling, what is this little basket under the bed with five eggs and £1,000 in it?"
"Oh," she said "I must confess that everytime
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Denomination:
Anglican
Contributed by Bryan Ness on Sep 4, 2002
based on 7 ratings
| 2,406 views
Variations on Murphy’s Law
The Murphy Philosophy
Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
Hartman’s Automotive Laws:
1. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on the weekend.
2. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on a trip.
3. Nothing minor ever happens to a car.
Cannon’s Cogent Comment:
The leak
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Denomination:
Adventist
Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 18, 2010
A man opened a new business and his best friend sent him a floral arrangement. When the friend popped in to see him a few days later, he was shocked to see that the shop had sent a card saying; "Rest in peace."
When he called the florist to complain, the florist said; “It could be worse.
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Denomination:
Brethren
Contributed by Paul Wallace on Dec 6, 2007
Snoopy took one look at the dog food and said, "This isn’t fair. The rest of the world today is eating turkey with all the trimmings and all I get is dog food. Because I’m a dog," he said, "all I get is dog food." He stood there and stared at
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Eric Ferguson on Jun 4, 2008
Illustration: Gumball
Show students an ordinary gumball, explaining that there’s an art to fitting into the world—especially a world with gum.
We can chew gum, blow bubbles with it, even use it as a sticky adhesive if we’re desperate.
But unwise people make a mess of gum, like the little girl
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Maddy and I moved to Frisby from New Romney at the end of 2007
As we were taking the bedroom apart, I was surprised to find a small basket underneath our bed with three eggs and £1000.
I was a bit puzzled and so I called Maddy and asked her what this was all about.
She said: “Well I have to be
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Denomination:
Anglican
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
Rosanna P. Smith said, After picking up our three-year-old on her first day of nursery school, my husband left the following message on my voice mail at work:
"Hi, honey. The good news is that Amanda got through her first day at school. The bad news is the teacher wants to meet with us.
"The good
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 3 ratings
| 1,838 views
"War is an ugly thing but not the ugliest of things; the decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feelings which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a
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Contributed by Bruce Howell on Nov 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
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A certain man told his friend that his brother was working to get his pilot’s license. His friend said, “O, that’s great!” “No, it wasn’t great because the engine caught fire.” “Oh, that’s terrible,” said his friend. “No, it wasn’t terrible because he had a parachute.” “Oh, that’s good,”
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 1,678 views
"Im convinced that if you level with the press, your coverage will be fair and balanced. Theres plenty of good and bad in every company. So just share the whole mishmash with them. Believe me, theyll find out the bad stuff anyway. Why not take them behind
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Contributed by Jerry Blaxton on Mar 5, 2010
I have a water filter attached to my kitchen sink at home. The water normally smells bad, tastes bad, because it has stuff in it. When the water comes into the filter, the filter holds on to all the bad stuff. It doesn’t allow the bad stuff to go on through.
I think our brains have a “filter” too.
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Karl Eckhoff on Oct 29, 2002
based on 1 rating
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I think the lead story for the Money section of the September 23rd issue of USA Today is a great example. The long piece chronicled some of the problems facing Japanese bankers. Bad debts for that country’s banks rose 29% in the last fiscal year to $350 billion, and that may be only a partial
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by Andrew Hoover on Aug 3, 2006
based on 5 ratings
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Well I thought that since we just celebrated Christmas that I would start out this morning by sharing some of the most overheard comments regarding bad Christmas gifts. So here they are, the top five most overheard comments regarding bad Christmas gifts…
5. Hey, now there’s a gift.
4. If
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Ed Wood on Feb 14, 2003
based on 98 ratings
| 2,137 views
Did you hear about the man who went to the doctor because he had a severe obesity problem? The doctor examined him very carefully, and said, “I have some good news and some bad news.” “The good news is that there is not anything wrong with your
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Paul Wallace on Sep 4, 2007
I got a picture in my mind from the Lord on the way back from preaching this at McLuney. As believers we have in our hands either healing salve or a bottle of rubbing alcohol. And as we interact with hurting people we either comfort them with salve, or we throw alcohol on their wounds. One makes
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
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