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In Sermon Illustrations: "Bad News"

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  • My Neice, Esther, Has Been A Good Cook From The ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 4, 2003
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,462 views

    My neice, Esther, has been a good cook from the time she was a little girl. She would have to stand on a chair just to get to the ingredients and mixing bowls. In the summer time she would make brownies and sell them at the local farmer’s market and had no problem sellling everything she made. ...read more

  • From "The Lion, The Witch And The ...

    Contributed by Randy Roberts on Nov 10, 2005
     | 1,659 views

    Illustration from “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe” First Reference: Tell the story from Chapter 4 about Edmund eating Turkish Delight for the first time. He becomes obsessed with the deceptive nourishment provided by the witch. Second Reference: When Edmund ate at the home of Mr. Beaver, ...read more

  • Tomorrow  PRO

    Contributed by David Parks on Sep 18, 2006
    based on 7 ratings
     | 3,558 views

    TOMORROW He was going to be all that a mortal should be Tomorrow No one would be better than he Tomorrow Each morning he stacked up the letters he would write Tomorrow It was too bad indeed he was too busy to see Bill, but he promised to do it Tomorrow The greatest of workers this man would ...read more

  • The Process Of Refining Silver Is A Long Process ...  PRO

    Contributed by Chad Garrison on Dec 23, 2006
    based on 2 ratings
     | 3,578 views

    The process of refining silver is a long process of heating the metal until all the imperfections have boiled out. Once the silver is cooled, it is then re-heated again to remove any other imperfections. This process is repeated until there are no signs of anything that isn’t the precious ...read more

  • I Was In Wal Mart The Other Day And I Saw This ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,602 views

    I was in Wal Mart the other day and I saw this girl that had a shirt on that said, "Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful-- Okay, just hate me." I sorta chuckled and my little brother looked at me and said, "What’s so funny about that?" ANd I said, "Well, She sure does not need to be wearing that ...read more

  • I Like The Old Story About The Guy Who Came To ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 3 ratings
     | 1,696 views

    I like the old story about the guy who came to church with his family. As they were driving home afterward he was complaining about everything. He said, “The music was too loud. The sermon was too long. The announcements were unclear. The building was hot. The people were unfriendly.” He went on & ...read more

  • The Bigger, The Better

    Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Jun 25, 2007
     | 1,334 views

    The Bigger the Better Joseph Stowell recounted a story: I was in West Africa—Timbuktu to be exact—and the missionaries were telling me that in that culture the larger the women were the more beautiful they were thought to be. In fact, a young missionary who had a small, trim wife said that the ...read more

  • Three Weeks After Her Wedding Day, Joanna Called ...  PRO

    Contributed by Kent Kessler on Aug 30, 2007
    based on 7 ratings
     | 2,441 views

    Three weeks after her wedding day, Joanna called her minister in hysterics. She was crying, “Pastor, John and I had our first fight together! It was awful. What am I going to do?" The pastor, leaning back in his chair and shaking his head said, "Calm down, Joanna, this isn’t nearly as bad as you ...read more

  • In Australia The Early Prison Authorities Knew ...

    Contributed by Richard Schwedes on Oct 14, 2007
     | 1,142 views

    In Australia the early prison authorities knew this To control and break the really bad prisoners They developed a solitary confinement gaol at Port Arthur, Where prisoners could have no contact with anyone else they were kept in a dark cell and even the prison guards wore cloth on their feet when ...read more

  • Someone Was Discussing With His Preacher The ...

    Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Jan 2, 2008
     | 1,618 views

    Someone was discussing with his preacher the advisability of writing down the names of the bride and groom in his notes. He had heard about a priest who was too proud to do that, and ended up calling a groom by the wrong name. The preacher said, "You think that’s bad? I began a ceremony and ...read more

  • Stupid With ...

    Contributed by Jesse Bennett on Nov 14, 2008
     | 1,664 views

    Stupid with money Will Smith Item: Dog shrink Cost: $2,500/month When the pressure of life get his dogs down, Smith’s four Rottweilers visit the Sigmund Freud of the canine world — renowned Hollywood hound analyst Cesar Millan, a.k.a. “The Dog Whisperer.” Apparently, it takes a special talent to ...read more

  • The Story Is Told About A Man Who Lay On His ...

    Contributed by Gene Gregory on Mar 16, 2009
     | 1,436 views

    The story is told about a man who lay on his death bed with his family and friends gathered around him. As he lay there he asked a friend to check and see if there was anything in his pockets. The friend checked and found the man had a dime in one pocket. The dying man asked him to place it in ...read more

  • So We Love Him In The Desert Place Of A Monday ...

    Contributed by Richard Francis on May 19, 2007
     | 1,105 views

    So we love him in the desert place of a Monday morning on a crowded train of sneezing sad looking people, we love him in the land of plenty as we gather in fellowship with our brothers and sisters, we love him in the doctors surgery when we are told the lump is bad, when the bills come, when the ...read more

  • C.s. Lewis On Judging Others

    Contributed by Rickey Bennett on Aug 18, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 7,455 views

    C.S. LEWIS ON JUDGING OTHERS C.S. Lewis wrote about this in Mere Christianity. He said, "One of the marks of a certain type of bad man is that he cannot give up a thing himself without wanting everyone else to give it up. That is not the Christian way. An individual Christian may see fit to give ...read more

  • When You Were Young, Did You Ever Tie A Towel ...

    Contributed by Greg Bond on Dec 28, 2009
     | 1,978 views

    When you were young, did you ever tie a towel around your neck, or have your mom make you a cape and then go running around the house screaming at the top of your lungs, jumping on and over furniture, throwing haymaker punches, and taking all sorts of imaginary bad guys into captivity? It was ...read more

  • Making Lemonade

    Contributed by Perry Greene on Jan 13, 2012
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,575 views

    MAKING LEMONADE Charles Goodyear went to jail for a contempt of court citation. Imprisoned, he went to work in the kitchen and worked on an idea in which he developed the method for vulcanizing rubber. Martin Luther was forced to stay in Wartburg Castle and his lemonade was his translation of the ...read more

  • C.s. Lewis' Screwtape Letters, Writing, Of ...  PRO

    Contributed by Gregg Strawbridge on Jul 8, 2002
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,802 views

    C.S. Lewis’ Screwtape Letters, writing, of course, as an elder devil to a younger devil, "One of our great allies at present is the Church itself. Do not misunderstand me. I do not mean the Church as we see her spread out through all time and space and rooted in eternity, terrible as an army with ...read more

  • And Starting Today, You Are Beginning To Turn ...  PRO

    Contributed by Peter Schmidt on Nov 13, 2003
    based on 2 ratings
     | 6,830 views

    And starting today, you are beginning to turn into adults. While your parents still are going to make a lot of choices for you, you are just beginning that Phase where you begin to make some life-changing decisions. You will learn that mom and dad won’t always be there to tell you what to do. I’m ...read more

  • If 99.9 Percent Is Good Enough, Then …

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 8, 2005
     | 2,590 views

    If 99.9 Percent Is Good Enough, Then … Two million documents will be lost by the IRS this year. 811,000 faulty rolls of 35mm film will be loaded this year. 22,000 checks will be deducted from the wrong bank accounts in the next 60 minutes. 1,314 phone calls will be misplaced by ...read more

  • If 99.9 Percent Is Good Enough, Then...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 10, 2006
    based on 2 ratings
     | 4,993 views

    If 99.9 percent is good enough, then... - Two million documents will be lost by the IRS this year. - 811,000 faulty rolls of 35mm film will be loaded this year. - 22,000 checks will be deducted from the wrong bank accounts in the next 60 minutes. - 1,314 phone calls will be misplaced by ...read more