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The Funniest Funeral Sermon Ever!
Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Dec 4, 2022 (message contributor)
Two brothers had terrorized a small town in Alabama for decades. They lied, they cheated, they stole and they were two of the sorriest persons in the entire town. Then, unfortunately, one of the brothers died unexpectedly.
The surviving brother went to the pastor of the local Baptist church. He said to the pastor, "My brother has died and I want him to have a good church funeral even though he didn't really believe in church and all that stuff. And I want you to do his service."
The pastor was getting uncomfortable when the brother also said, "And there is something I need you to say during this funeral. I want you to tell everyone that my brother was a real saint!"
The minister interrupted, "But he was far from that! I can't stand in my pulpit and lie to everyone in town. They know what a sorry person he was."
The wealthy brother pulled out his checkbook and said, "Well, Preacher, I'm prepared to give your church $50,000 right now. All you have to do is agree to say that my brother was a saint."
After much thought, the pastor finally agreed. The whole town soon heard about the deal and they packed the church to hear what the pastor was going to say about this terrible man.
At the funeral service, the pastor began his sermon by saying, "Friends, here lies one of the sorriest persons who ever lived in this town. He cheated, he stole, he lied, he cussed, he got drunk and he was a womanizer. Folks, he truly was one of the sorriest persons who ever lived......but compared to his older brother, who is sitting right here in front of me today, he was a REAL SAINT!!
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