Work It Out! Series

Technicolor JOY: Philippians 4:1-3

Pastor Jefferson M. Williams

Chenoa Baptist Church

09-03-2023

How Do You Do That?

In Mississippi, I met with two other guys to disciple and encourage them. Luke was very opinionated and we actually got into an intense disagreement and were at odds with each other for a couple of days.

I invited him to come early to our weekly meeting and we sat down and, within ten minutes, had made peace and were laughing about something when Stewart walked in.

Stewart was surprised to find us together and asked if we were still “at war.” We laughed and said that everything was fine.

He stared at us and then sat down in the chair and said, “I wish I knew how to do that!”

Let’s Get Ready to Rumble!

Conflict happens when we allow our sinful nature to rule. When we let selfishness, personal preferences, and our own opinions take priority, chaos and conflict are inevitable.

We want to do things our way and our motives are often suspiciously self-centered. We are quick to point out other's faults and ignore the “log in our own eye.” We quarrel and fight and often we enjoy it!

Chuck Swindoll pointedly states,

“If a disagreement should be resolved and could be resolved, but is not, then our stubbornness and selfishness are at the core of the failure.”

Maybe you are like my friend Stewart and making peace when conflict arises is a mysterious process. God’s word has something to say to us about this.

Three Ways to Handle Conflict

Ken Sande, who wrote the book “Peacemakers,” proposes three different ways that we handle conflict. Much of the material I will be presenting today comes from his book.

First, we can be “peace-fakers.” We can deny that there is conflict or actually run away to avoid dealing with the problem.

Second, we can be “peace-breakers.” These are people who are more interested in winning the argument than saving a friendship.

They can be rude, physically abusive, and even violent. These people seem to thrive on conflict and will create problems, even in the midst of peace.

We often learn our conflict resolution skills from our parents.

What happens when one parent is a peace-faker and another is a peace-breaker?

That’s the house I grew up in. I was frightened of my mother’s temper and frustrated by my dad’s passiveness. I was afraid of conflict and felt paralyzed in the face of problems.

May I ask a personal question? Are you in the same boat? Are you unsure of yourself when it comes to handling conflict?

There is another way, a middle ground in the continuum of conflict resolution.

Jesus calls us to be “peace-makers,” proactively seeking peace in order to preserve unity:

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God…” (Matthew 5:9)

There are consequences for such actions. Listen to James, the brother of Jesus:

“Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.” (James 3:18)

Peace is to personify God’s people. As disciples, we are to be known as peace-makers. It will permeate every interaction and ultimately lead to unity.

The United Way

Turn with me to our text for this morning Philippians 4:2-3.

Prayer.

Before we dive into our discussion, let’s look at some Scriptures that give us a glimpse of God’s heart on the subject of unity.

Paul wrote to the church of Corinth, which was racked by divisions and disagreement:

“I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought.” (I Corinthians 1:10)

There are times when divisions over the fundamental truths of Scripture will occur. But even during these debates and discussions, the unity of the church should be our highest concern:

“Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” (Ephesians 4:3)

Paul gives us an example in Philippians of how to handle conflict in a Biblical, Christ-honoring manner.

Stand Firm

“Therefore, my brothers and sisters, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, stand firm in the Lord in this way, dear friends!”

Paul ends this section with an outpouring of love for his dear Philippian friends - my brothers…whom I love and long for…my joy and my crown…dear friends.

He says something similar to his friends in Thessalonica:

“Who is our hope or joy or crown of exultation? Is it not even you, in the presence of our Lord Jesus at His coming? For you are our glory and joy? (I Thes 2:19) 

And what is his command to them?

Stand firm. This verb tense means to continue to persevere and remain firm in their faith. It can describe a soldier standing fast in the midst of a battle with the enemy closing in.