Why Praying Is Difficult

This morning, I’d like to talk with you about a spiritual discipline which is at the core of the Christian life. This is something which everyone acknowledges is important, and valuable, and rewarding. We all agree that it’s a good thing. And yet, we may also hope that no one inquires too closely as to our own practice of this spiritual discipline. You’ve probably guessed that what I’m referring to is prayer; specifically, private prayer, sometimes called “secret prayer”. That is, prayer that is just between you and God. And lest there be any doubt, the Scriptures do confirm that this is something we should be doing, that this is a normal part of the Christian life.

In Matthew’s gospel, Our Lord says this:

“6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:6)

“When you pray”, not “if you pray”. There is no ambiguity here; we are to go into our room and close the door, so that we are alone with our Father. And we are then to pray, to direct our thoughts to him, either silently or aloud. And as an inducement to do so, we are given a promise, that God will see what we are doing and will reward us.

Good. So we have both an implied command and a promise. Then why don’t we do it? Why don’t we pray? Or, if we do pray, why do we often feel guilty that we aren’t praying as frequently, or as much, or as fervently as we should? What’s holding us back? And my answer is that there are several reasons why we struggle to consistently practice the spiritual discipline of prayer, despite the fact that we know it is commanded, and despite the fact that we know it will be rewarded. It’s not all your fault. What I’d like to us to do is to examine five of those hindrances, five of those impediments to prayer, so that we can overcome them instead of being defeated by them. And we’ll also look at some of the promises the Scriptures give us concerning prayer, to further strengthen our resolve.

Why is it difficult to pray? Reason one. Because we’ve been programmed to think that every minute of every day must be optimized. We’ve been told that we have to maximize our productivity; we must ensure that we are being as useful as we possibly can. The world tells us that’s how we measure our value, by our productive work. And so we measure and track everything, even our so-called “leisure” activities. Instead of just going for a walk, we count the number of steps we take in a day, and compare it to the number of steps we took last week, and the number of steps that other people take, and whether our number is increasing or decreasing. We have devices on our wrists that measure our REM sleep and our overnight resting hear rate, so that we are optimizing our health even when we are unconscious. We judge everything by the standard of efficiency: benefits gained and work output produced versus time and effort invested.

And against all that, we have prayer. By all appearances, one of the least productive things you could do. Literally just sitting or kneeling, and thinking. That’s all. And not even what you might consider productive thinking, like strategizing, or planning. No, just talking to God. Praising him for who he is and for what he has done. Confessing our sins. Giving thanks. Asking God for what we need and want. No goals achieved. No metrics tracked. By the world’s standard, it seems like an unproductive waste of time. And by the way, if you are tracking prayer metrics, like the number of requests prayed for, or average length of time in prayer, please stop, because it’s ridiculous. Prayer is a relationship, a conversation. It isn’t something to be optimized, or maximized, or made more efficient.

So. How do we convince our modern, productivity-obsessed selves that prayer is time well spent, even if we don’t have any metrics, or objective criteria, by which to measure its value? One way is to consider the example of Christ. This is a man who has only about three years to accomplish his purpose, which is by the way, the most important thing that anyone has ever done. It’s absolutely critical that he succeed. And while other great men of history had decades to complete their life’s work, he has only about 36 months. In that brief time, he has to recruit and train the men who will carry on his work after he is gone. He has to travel widely and preach to thousands of people, making sure that his teachings are clear and complete, because those teachings will serve as the basis for all of humanity, in every time and place and culture, to understand God’s plans and purposes for their lives. He has three years to communicate that entire theological system. In addition, he is carrying out an ongoing healing ministry. And this healing ministry, coupled with his preaching and teaching, results in huge throngs of people following him, seeking him out, at all times of the day and night, wherever he went. For example, Mark tells us that: