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Summary: Building Strong Families with lessons based on the 10 commandments

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The Ninth Commandment: Exodus 20:16 “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.

Of all the commandments this one seems to be the most ambiguous for everyone. We rationalize not speaking the truth. We don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings. You know those questions:

1. Does this dress make me look fat?

2. How do you like my new hair do?

3. What do you think of my new dress?

The man who created the lie detector tried it out on 25,000 people and determined that people are basically deceitful. He then wanted to know more about lying and polled the 25,000 people

66% - It is not wrong to tell the truth

Two ways to lie

Intentionally misled

Withholding the truth

31% said that honesty is not the best policy

86% lie to their parents

73% lie to their brothers and sisters

59% of the parents lie to their children

61% lie to their employees or employers

75% lie to their friends

69% of all married couples lie to each other

We don’t want someone to know who we really are. Many people think it is OK to lie if they are going to get into trouble for telling the truth.

What will a lie cost you?

1. You won’t have any friends

2. If I lie to my boss, my company or my customers, I will eventually be fired.

3. I will be emotionally trapped

One question I want you to consider and try to answer for yourself is “How much energy does a lie cost me?”

I) Why do people lie?

Matthew 12:34

You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.

Matthew 15:19

For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.

The truth about flim - flam

The spin: The motive:

• Power lie Insecurity and low self-esteem

• Tabloid lie Hurt people hurt people

• 7/11 lie Convenient – Gets you out of a jam

• 911 lie Liar escape – Get out of trouble

• Gumby man lie Stretch the truth

• X-treme lie Roller Coaster Lie – All or nothing

II) What are the benefits to telling the truth?

1. Growing healthy friendships

Genesis 3:7

Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.

1 John 1:7

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.

Fellowship:

Unity

Transparency

Honesty

Integrity

God is asking us to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Truth is the glue that holds a relationship together. Without truth there is no relationship.

What’s God going to think of me? He is right there with you when you do the wrong thing no matter what it is.

Proverbs 13:17

A wicked messenger falls into trouble, but a trustworthy envoy brings healing.

2. Promotion at work

Proverbs 16:13

Kings take pleasure in honest lips; they value a man who speaks the truth.

Top 10 business lies:

1. The check is in the mail

2. Your money is cheerfully refunded

3. One size fits all

4. This offer is limited to the first 100 customers

5. This car is in mint condition

6. We service what we sell

7. Open wide this won’t hurt a bit

8. At the beep leave you name and number and we will return your call immediately

9. I’m from the IRS and I’m here to help you

10. This sale ends on midnight Tuesday

J.P. Morgan was once asked what the best collateral someone could have is. He thought for a moment and he said “Character”. Character out ways cash, Real Estate, stocks and bonds.

3. Freedom in my heart

John 8:31-32

To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. [32] Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

What kind of freedom are we talking about? Freedom from being caught.

Credit Card Lie

Day Timer Lie

Church Lie

Psalm 34:12-13

Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days, [13] keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.

Ephes. 4:15

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ.

How do I tell the Truth?

Completely

Consistently

Compassionately

Tactfully

To Tell the Truth Quiz

1. Is there anything right now I need to stop lying about?

2. Is there a barrier in a relationship that I am not dealing with?

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