What Should I Do With This Anger

Help, What Should I Do With This Anger?

NLF 3/21/2004 2 Samuel 13: 7-33 Ephesians 4:25-32

Our bible study this week will deal with the stress of anger. When was the last time that you became very angry? An hour after it was over, how did you feel about the way you handled yourself during your period of anger? How did God feel about it?

Now do not think that anger means we no longer have the Holy Spirit living inside of us. Anger is a God given emotion that helps us to keep things in balance. Think what would happen to us and our children if you never got angry at some of the things they did. Our house and their lives would be totally out of control. It also would be a terrible thing to see someone be cruelly beaten and mistreated, and simply say “whatever” and go about your business. Anger is necessary part of our spiritual growth.

The bible uses the words, “in your anger” which means God expects us to be angry at times. But it goes on to say, “in your anger, do not sin.” It’s important for us to realize the distinction between anger and sin. The two are not the same, but the second will follow very quickly on the heels of the first if we do not do hold that anger in check. We have a choice of how to deal with our anger. Situations are going to arise in our lives, and what we do with our anger is going to determine the quality of our future.

One issue that is a reason for anger today is the rise of sexual abuse that takes place in the home. We do not like to think of older brothers or step brothers forcing younger sisters to have sex with them but it happens. We do not want to think that our boyfriends will have sex with our daughters or sons who are not yet teens but it happens. We do not want to think of fathers, grandfathers, and uncles having sex with their daughters, granddaughters, and nieces but it happens.

It happens not just among people who never attend church, but it happens in families that attend church every week. The sooner we have frank and open discussions with our children about sex, the safer environment we can create for them. They need to know before sexual abuse takes place what our reaction to them will be, otherwise they may have it happen and live in silence, shame, and anger.

The bible gives us a picture of what has happened, what is happening, and what will happen. It does not sugar coat the lives of the people that were used by God. King David was one of the great leaders in the bible, who loved the Lord. The bible called David, “a man after God’s own heart.” But one day, he used his position and influence to trick a married woman in to coming to the palace one night.

Before she left, he had sex with her, and sent her away as though nothing had happened. She got pregnant. To try to cover the whole thing up, the David ended up having her husband killed, and he took the woman as his own wife. God was very angry with what David had done, and told him there would be a great consequence for his action. We should never think we have the perfect plan to keep others from finding out what we have done.

David had a number of wives. His oldest son was Amnon. As the oldest, Amnon was next in line to be king. Amnon was not interested in the things of God, but he was interested in his half sister. He thought he was in love with her , but in reality he was in lust. Amnon fantasized a lot about Tamar, to the point he felt he just had to have her. His goal was to get her alone so that he could get in bed with her to have sex. Who do you think was his role model for this scheme? Yes, his father David.

Amnon pretended to be ill. He asked his father David, to send his half sister Tamar to his house so that he could eat some of her cakes. David sent Tamar to his house. Amnon had everybody leave his chambers, and asked Tamar to come feed him in the bedroom. When she went into the bedroom, he grabbed her and asked her to have sex with him. She said no. She reminded him of what it would cost them both in terms of their future and the disgrace it would bring upon them. She was a virgin and wanted to remain a virgin until her marriage.