What Does It Mean To Honor Our Parents?

What does it mean to honor our parents?

Luke 2:41-52

Rev. Dr. Michael H. Koplitz

Luke 2:41 Now His parents went to Jerusalem every year at the Feast of the Passover. 42 And when He became twelve, they went up there according to the custom of the Feast; 43 and as they were returning, after spending the full number of days, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem. But His parents were unaware of it, 44 but supposed Him to be in the caravan, and went a day’s journey; and they began looking for Him among their relatives and acquaintances. 45 When they did not find Him, they returned to Jerusalem looking for Him. 46 Then, after three days they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both listening to them and asking them questions. 47 And all who heard Him were amazed at His understanding and His answers. 48 When they saw Him, they were astonished; and His mother said to Him, “1Son, why have You treated us this way? Behold, Your father and I have been anxiously looking for You.” 49 And He said to them, “Why is it that you were looking for Me? Did you not know that I had to be in My Father’s house?” 50 But they did not understand the statement which He had made to them. 51 And He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and He continued in subjection to them; and His mother treasured all these things in her heart. 52 And Jesus kept increasing in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.

According to the Ten Commandments, we are supposed to honor our mother and father. I was wondering what exactly that means. Well, we can interpret it and since it was written in ancient times, we should examine the ancient culture to discern the intended meaning of the Scripture. In Jesus' day, the culture said that a young person would accept the counsel and direction of their parents in the decisions that concern their lives.

If a young boy wanted to become a carpenter, he would talk to his father about such an occupation. If his father was not a carpenter, he might steer him in another direction because his father would know very little about that trade. Or his father could simply say, “let’s go talk to the local carpenter and see if we get you an apprenticeship.” When it came to following religious rituals, it would be a question that would be answered by one’s mother. Religious education was the responsibility of the father. Executing religious education, that means following the customs of the festivals, was left to the mother to explain and teach.

It is understandable to seek counsel from your parents because they’ve already lived through some things you’re about to live through. In today’s environment, it does not mean that you have to do exactly what they say. However, it is usually a good idea to listen to their thoughts on subjects because they have experience.

In this way, you're showing respect to your parents for their experience. Honoring our parents means to show them respect. However, at the same time, parents are expected to show respect to their children. Children are considered a blessing from God and should be treated that way. I hate to tell you this, but my parents saw their children as a burden and not a blessing. I honestly wonder why my parents ever had children.

Back in the 1990s, there was a show titled “Dinosaurs.” Some of you might remember this show. The dinosaurs were Muppet type characters created by Jim Henson and each episode addressed different social issues of the time. One episode that I find most interesting was that parents were required to get a license in order to have children. They would have to take training on how to raise children and would have to take a test. Naturally, during this episode, Earl, the father of the household, failed his licensing renewal exam. Eventually, he passed the test and got his renewal for his license. I remember watching this episode thinking how great it would’ve been for my parents to take such an exam and training. Needless to say you can gather from what I just said that my parents weren’t great at it.

I will say that I honor my parents because I learned from them how not to parent. There were several things that they did, which I will not discuss here, that I ensure I did not do. Warren Bennis, who was a professor and an author in leadership skills, wrote in one of his books that the best leadership lessons that we can get are by watching those who are doing it wrong. I can attest to you that many of my leadership skills came from watching bosses do it wrong.