This Marriage Thing!

This Marriage Thing! Holy Ghost

Ephesians 5:22-33

Someone once told me that if you're single you're incomplete but when you get married you're finished! If you happen to get married to the wrong woman you're completely finished! Lol.. Funny as it sounds there's an element of truth in this statement. Several times I've been told that I cannot claim to be on fire for Jesus until I'm married. Men and women alike who were on fire for God have suddenly slowed down or outrightly gone cold after getting married.

As I prepare to take this big step in my life my desire and prayers is that I'd not be part of the statistics. I have been carefully studying what the bible says about the institution of marriage. I know there are so many books out on marriage and marriage seminars but I want a first hand revelation from the Master's manual itself (the bible). I've read and listen to different interpretations and ideas from different marriage experts but I want to know what Ultimate Expert expects of me exactly. After saying "I do" and the excitement of wedding ceremonies and honeymoon what next? When the honey comes back from the moon how am I to conduct myself? Oh, I'm going for marriage counselling but that's supposed to be an addition to what I've learnt myself.

A careful study of the passage above has really blown my mind. I personally believe the brothers get the hard end of the deal in this passage. Lol.. This passage relates the marriage between the man and his wife with the marriage between Christ and His church! The man should be like Christ whilst the woman should be like the church.. Hellooo! How? I can't even be like Peter well enough not to talk of Christ!

The passage began with a popular instruction to the wives.. Wives, submit.. Every married man must know this scripture by heart I'm sure.. Lol.. Who is a wife? A wife is a WOMAN joined in marriage or matrimony to a man and considered as his spouse. Wives! Not every woman is a wife you know, but every wife MUST be a woman! Some women don't know how to be women because of their background. They've been 'acting' the man all their life that even when they get married they confuse their roles. No need you trying to be the man, be the best woman God has created you to be. Wives!

The next word is submit- to submit means to yield or surrender (oneself) to the will and authority of another! Now this is reallyyyy difficult! This means willingly relinquishing your will to another. Submission is a word that has lost relevance in our generation. An example of submission is found in the book of Genesis 12:1-5- God told a 75year old man to leave his home and family to a place that he knew nothing about and he didn't argue, question or rationalise he just obeyed. Sarai was more interesting to me because she wasn't the one God spoke with so she had every right to say no but she never questioned the instruction. I know this wouldn't go down well with women in our generation at all. Imagine your husband wakes up one morning and says "honey we are travelling out of our country, we would resign our jobs and go somewhere" so the woman would ask "where exactly are we going cause you're not making sense at all". Man: "hmmm (scratching his head) I will tell you when we get there" Woman: "are you having a laugh or you've just lost your mind! You mean I should leave my job that pays the bills and follow you to a place you don't even know! Shameless, irresponsible man!" Most men who would have responded to the call of God to leave where they are to go somewhere God is taking them are still busy trying to convince their wives whilst God has moved on to find an alternative. Submit! Submission like someone pointed out is a fusion of 2 root words, Sub- Mission. Though you have your own plans and mission it should be surrendered to your husband's authority and can the church say amen! I honestly don't think most women understand the advantage of this instruction. If you're submitted to someone's authority they're automatically responsible for whatever happens to you! Which means that every time you submit to your husband God holds him responsible for your welfare!

Wives, submit yourselves unto YOUR OWN husbands.. Your own husbands! The bible is very specific in it's instructions to us as believers. Wonder why the bible would say your own? Why is it necessary to specify? There are women who are very respectful and submissive to other women's husbands but never submit to their own husband. There are Christian wives who would never submit to their husband because he's not as 'spiritual' as they are. There are wives who would not submit to their own husbands because they pay the bills. You submit to your boss at work like he's your God but disrespect your husband- you're a good staff not a good wife! You submit to your pastor, deacons and HOD but only submit to your husband when convenient you're a good church member not a good wife and certainly not a good Christian! Proverbs 31:10-31 describes a model wife and mother but the first quality mentioned in her relationship is to her husband. Verse 11 says the heart of her husband safely trust in her.. Has confidence in her! Verse 23 further explains what his confidence in her does to him outside! Maybe you're the reason why your husband is still on the level he is! If you emasculate your man at home he would never rise up outside!