The Love Language Of Physical Touch Series

The 5 Love languages

Physical Touch

May 15, 2022

He gives you flowers, which are really nice, but what you really want is a one on one, soul to soul, heart to heart conversation. She gives you a hug after a hard day’s work, but what you really need is a delicious home-cooked meal. He gives you great back rubs, but what you really want is someone to clean up the house. She asks you about your day and wants to know every detail, but all you want is someone to give you a hug and cuddle for a bit.

Maybe that describes you and your relationship right now. Maybe that’s part of the past. Sometimes we think we’re the problem. Sometimes we’re made to think that it’s us, and not somehow the fact that we’re miscommunicating love on a very basic level and that’s hurting our relationships.

The problem isn’t your love – it’s your love language! According to Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages, just as we speak different languages - - - there are also different love languages.

We’re now on week 4 of our 5 week series and I hope it’s been beneficial for you. Maybe you know your kids a little better, or you’re learning more about your spouse or significant other and the ways to show them love according to their needs, and not yours. Maybe you’ve learned more about you, and that’s great!

I’m going to say this and maybe step on a few toes. If so, then sorry, but not really! This series is meant to help us learn to love better. So, if you still don’t know you’re love language, it’s time to learn it. If you don’t know your spouse or kids love language, it’s time to find out. If you don’t have access to the internet to take the quiz, then let us know and we’ll set you up at church and you can take it.

We want you to learn to love and be loved better. God loves us through each of the 5 love languages and has uniquely designed us to receive and give love. It’s vital to know, so that you can love better. And spouses, don’t ask your mate to guess. Because if they’re wrong, that’s embarrassing. Just say, ‘hey, honey, I took the love language quiz and my love language is . . .’

Normally, we give love the way we receive love. If you’re into Acts of Service, then that’s what you try to do. If you’re all about receiving gifts, then you like to give gifts. So, sometimes we will be stretched to give love in a different way, especially if everyone in the house has different love languages. It can make life a little crazy, but it’s worth it.

So, if you have not learned your love language or the love language of your kids or those who are really close to you, take the love language quiz. It’s in your bulletin and on the screen.

www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes

So far, we’ve looked at - - -

Words of Affirmation – For some, they best receive love through what we say and how we say it. Finding love through kind and encouraging words.

Quality Time - love through presence. Being with another person, giving them your undivided attention. It can be doing something together or just being together with no distractions.

Receiving Gifts - Gifts are a tangible, symbolic expression of love. We remember the love of the other person when we look at or use the gift. They don’t have to be big and expensive, but are reminders we were thought of.

There are 2 more to go. Next week we will look at Acts of Service. Today, we’re going to look at PHYSICAL TOUCH.

This is one of the most fundamental ways that we show love. It’s one of the easiest. We don’t even have to say anything. Have you ever stood with someone who is grieving. There are no words to say other than “I’m sorry for your loss!” But it’s that hug, it’s the touch on the arm, it’s the firm handshake which communicates your presence and love.

A great deal of research has been conducted on physical touch for babies. They’ve learned that babies who are held, hugged, and kissed develop a healthier emotional life than those who have not.

They’ve gone to orphanages where babies were not held very much, but given proper nutrition, they found they didn’t grow as well, they had emotional issues and some actually died due to lack of physical contact.

Research indicates that holding hands reduces stress. So, next time you’re having a disagreement at home, go and hold hands. Actually, as crazy as that sounds, that may be a great idea.