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The Dilema Of Divorce
Contributed by Richard Harsell on Jun 26, 2004 (message contributor)
Summary: Divorce is not "The Second Unpardonable Sin."
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"The Dilema of Divorce" Mark 10: 1-12
Richard F. Harsell friendshippastor@yahoo.com
The issue of divorce among believers has been
a centuries-old problem within the Church
which remains a spiritual "hot potato" still
today. Here in America, statistics tell us
that 43% of first-time marriages end in
either separation or divorce.
50 years ago, divorces were a rarity among
Christians. Furthermore, when church members
got divorced, they seldom remarried, because
they were convinced that to remarry while
one’s former spouse was still alive was to
enter into an adulterous relationship.
Many of us present here today can remember
a time when most pastors of major
denominational churches would completely
refuse to perform marriages for previously-
divorced persons if either partner had a
living former spouse. And formerly-divorced
people who went ahead and remarried while
their former spouses were still living were
considered to be "living in sin" and in
many cases ran into difficulty if they
desired to become members of most
evangelical churches.
And most certainly, any minister who was
a victim of a broken marriage would never
be considered for a pastoral role in any
main-line church
For thousands of years, the church has not
really known what to do with people who
have been victims of divorce, and they; to
some degree; have been guilty many times of
treating such people as kind of "spiritual
lepers," and condemning divorce as if it
were the "second unpardonable sin" which
would plague those unfortunate enough to be
its victims for the rest of their lives
But times have changed, and divorce has
become common within the ranks of all
evangelical Christian churches,
especially in the past few decades.
I’d venture to say that nearly all of us
are acquainted with people who are
products of broken marriages, whether
they be among our friends, families, or
acquaintences, and the church has been
forced, although often with a great deal of reluctance, to adapt to the situation.
I, for one, feel that these adapations
are long overdue!
Today it is a rare thing for a church to
refuse membership to a couple because one
or even both parties have been previously
divorced. The former stigma that had been
attached to divorced people for centuries
has lessened greatly and it is common to
find previously-divorced and remarried
people serving both as officers and
teachers in many churches. In addition,
we even find a number of prominent
evangelists and pastors who are included
in this statistic as well.
But even though the attiudes of people and
even churches have become much more relaxed
on the subject of divorce, a number of
questions still remain for the evangelical
Christian who seeks to be Scripturally correct regarding divorce and remarriage. Is divorce a
sin which God holds against a person for the
rest of his or her life, and is that sin
compounded to even a greater degree, if that
person elects to remarry into what Scipture
terms an "adulterous" relationship?
Furthermore, if a person has been a victim
of divorce and has remarried, does he or she
live in a continual state of adultery?
And finally, is there forgiveness for the
sin of adultery?
This unfortunately, has remained one of those
"gray areas" of theology which the majority
of preachers have chosen not to address
through the years, for fear of causing
embarrassment, if not open rebellion in the
ranks of their congregations. Among Southern
Baptists, for the most part, pastors are
pretty-well left to decide the issue for
themselves based on their personal convictions,
in how to handle the questions which arise
concerning divorcees.
I find that my own personal conviction on the
subject was greatly influenced by a statement
made years ago by one of my college professors
who had been my former pastor as well: In a
class on pastoral practices one student
brought up the question about performing
marriages for people who had previously
lived together in an unwed state, and as we
discussed the subject it sort of "self-
enlarged" to include people who had been
previously divorced as well. How were we
to balance our "right-wing" interpretations of
Scripture with compassion and Christian love
to an ever-enlarging group of hurting people?
When questioned on the subject, our wizened
professor, who was normally an ultra-
conservative man in every way, made a remark
which took most of the class by surprise in saying, "if I am so self-righteous that I
feel a conviction against dispensing
the ordinance of marriage to sinners, which
will bring them OUT of a sinful situation,
then who am I to share the love of Jesus
with them and their need for Him in their
lives?
As we see in the Genesis account, which was
later affirmed by Jesus, God’s original plan concerning the maritial relationship was that