The Company We Keep

What is a friend?

What does it mean to be a friend?

When we are young we have lots of friends. My youngest believes that anyone that plays with him at any given time is his friend. Most times he doesn’t even know their name and will probably never see them again.

As we get older, we see our circle of friends get smaller. As adults, we can probably count on one hand who we consider to be true friends.

This is not always a bad thing. We grow up and start our own lives, get jobs, get married, have kids. Our time is now filled with new things.

As we get down to this handful of friends, the friends we choose is critical.

Proverbs 18:24

A man of too many friends comes to ruin, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Having friends that are trustworthy, dependable and will hold you accountable is not always the easiest thing to accomplish.

Friends that you grew up with may not be the best influence in our lives as an adult and as a Christian. Let’s face it, people change. And maybe it was you that changed. Maybe turning from the world and living for CHRIST is what changed you.

At some point, your relationship with non Christian friends is going to have to change and maybe even end.

2 Corinthians 6:14

14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

Now, this does not mean that as a Christian, we sever all ties with the outside world and our friends. One of the worst things we can do as a Christian is remove ourselves from society. We are called to be the light of the world.

Matthew 5:14-16

14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.

15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.

16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Jesus gave us the Great Commission in Matthew 28:19 “ Go and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Ghost.”

It does mean that what you do with the time you spend with your friends has to change. The trips to the bar, the drinking, the foul jokes, the cussing, all the things that are not glorifying to GOD have to stop.

But if you cut them off completely, how can you minister to them?

Finding ways to spend time with them that does not compromise Christian values isn’t that hard. And living a GOD filled life and sharing that joy with your friends is the greatest testimony. Nothing would make me happier to see my friends in heaven. I am sure you can say the same thing.

I will say though, if they are causing you to slip back into a worldly lifestyle, you have to end the relationship.

Never stop praying for them.

I had a friend that I thought would be a lifelong brother. We were very close at one point. Our families did a lot together, but when I was saved, I quickly found out that our friendship was not good for me. He was not the influence that I needed in my life. Even though he claimed to be a Christian, his actions and lifestyle showed that he wasn’t. I understand that we are all in different stages in our walk with CHRIST, but you can’t spend most of your time justifying your own sins, pointing out the sins of others and grow closer to GOD. Jesus tells us in Matthew 7 to remove the plank from our own eye first before we help our brother with the splinter in his.

I had to cut that friendship off completely, but I still pray for Nathan.

Losing friends in life can be very hard, but GOD always has a purpose for these moments in our life.

So. What type of friend should we have in our lives?

The Bible says a lot about what a friend should be.

Proverbs 17:17

17 A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Tells us that a friend will stick with us even in our toughest times.

Proverbs 27:6

6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.

This tells us that love that refuses to correct a friend has no value. A true friend will not be afraid to tell us hard truths or hold us accountable.