Stay Married Series

4. Now, this is a hard teaching, but as I implied before, we don’t change or jettison difficult sayings because they are difficult. Remember Jesus’ disciples were so taken back, they said it’s better not to get married. This is why we must teach this now, not in the midst of troubles. The church must be warned about divorcing too quickly. You may think twice if you know that you can’t just remarry. It’s a good motivation to try again to work thing out, if you know that you must marry your spouse again or stay single. Even in cases of adultery, where there is repentance on behalf of the erring spouse, divorce should be avoided if possible. Adultery does not require divorce, and Christians should not pursue it in the case of repentance. And this truth is really hard. The only way you can carry it out is to rely upon the Spirit of God. Just btw—separation as we know it, is not biblical, and usually not helpful. Note here that Paul didn’t say that they were “still married in God’s eyes.” That terminology is not helpful or biblical. He says that they are now unmarried (divorced, marriage covenant broken), even though that divorce was illegitimate. So I am not going to bombard you with statistics and studies about how practically divorce is a bad idea. I just want to simply say that if you want to do what the bible says because you love Jesus, don’t divorce. Just another btw, once Christian spouses involved in illegitimate divorces are to the point where there is no hope of reconciliation (death or remarriage of the other spouse) I would say, that they are free to marry again.

B. Married to an Unbeliever (v. 12-16)

1. Now to the unbeliever. The instructions are different because Christ is the authority in both spouses life, rather than just one. And so there is a greater chance they will not tell the world a lie about God. Explain. But here Paul still says, stay married. The lack of faith in a spouse’s life does not justify a divorce. If they will stay with you, don’t leave them. And he gives two reasons along with the alternative. Lots of language and truths here that are unclear, but we can understand easily the overall principle. First, the unbelieving spouse does not defile your home or children. God’s blessing is upon a home by virtue of having one believer there, whether it is a spouse or children there. Also he says that it is possible that your witness to your spouse might lead to their conversion. The alternative scenario that he deals with is that of an unbelieving spouse that wants a divorce. In their day, as in ours, if one partner wanted out, eventually they could get out. So Paul says if they leave, a believer is not bound by the marriage, let them leave. And looking at v. 39 at the end of the chapter, it seems that what is in view is the ability to be remarried. And it seems like he/she is free to do so.

2. Argumentation

3. Illustration: An employer has influence, but cannot force a worker not to quit,

4. Marriage to believers or unbelievers still demonstrates the bride/husband relationship between Christ as His church. It is sacred regardless of faith, because God made it all. Remember, there is a higher standard for the believer than the unbeliever. It may seem unfair, but you should take it up with the author. Many times the question in raised is whether or not a spouse that will act the way the do is really a Christian. But that question is a legitimate one, but can’t be answered with a blanket statement. But if an unbelieving spouse leaves, Christians are free to remarry, but let this be a lesson to you, and be very careful in selecting another mate. But God’s point and heart is that we all stay married. And that we do this because we are desirous to follow Him. Therefore let us not seek loopholes to get out, but covenant to stay in and get right and make the marriage wonderful before it’s too late. Know that marriage is something that honors God if we do it well, but has the potential to harm our testimony if we do it like the world does.