Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

Perfectly Accepted By Our God- Part B Series

Contributed by Thomas Swope on Oct 22, 2015

A study of the book of Hebrews 10: 19 – 39

Hebrews 10: 19 – 39 Perfectly Accepted By Our God- Part B 19Therefore, brethren, having boldness to enter the Holiest by the blood of Jesus, 20 by a new and living way which He consecrated for us, through the veil, that is, His flesh, 21 and having a High Priest over the house of God, 22 let ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 10:19-39

Denomination: Calvary Chapel

Left Behind--The Rapture

Contributed by Rick Gillespie- Mobley on Jan 28, 2001

This sermon deals with the rapture from a pre-tribulation viewpoint. Excellent background for the movie Left Behind.

Left Behind 1/28/2001 Genesis 7:11-24 Matthew 24:36-44 Let’s meet Curt. This was Curt’s first visit to the church. Dave had jokingly told Curt, come to my church because not only can you find Jesus, but some of the women are beautiful. Nicole had stood up to give a testimony. The moment ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 24:36-44, 2 Thessalonians 2:7-11

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Stairway To Heaven Series

Contributed by Joseph Smith on Mar 4, 2001

The beatitudes can be understood sequentially .. as stairsteps to "perfection" (Matt. 5:48). The first four lift us to fellowship with God; the other four bring us back down to the reality of ministry with needy people. This sermon was delivered using a ladder as a "prop".

When Stanley Kubrick made the movie “2001: A Space Odyssey”, he guessed that by this time we would be flitting back and forth in outer space, visiting other planets and seeing things never before seen by human beings. The movie suggested that those who would be alive in the year 2001 would go on ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 5:1-12

Denomination: Baptist

That Do We Mean When We Say That Jesus Is A Burden Bearer?

Contributed by Tommy Davis on Mar 26, 2001

This sermon deals with the age old saying that Jesus is a "burden bearer." And yet so many people do not really know and understand what it means for Jesus to be their burden bearer. This is the transcript of the sermon.

28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Subject: What Do We Mean When We Say ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 11:28-30, Matthew 11:28

Denomination: Baptist

Wrestling For A Change Series

Contributed by Wayde Wilson on Nov 13, 2000

Spiritual Growth

“Wrestling For A Change” Genesis 32:22-32 Change can be a painful process, particularly in the area of spiritual maturity. I look back 20 years or so ago to my high school and college days and I realize God was working with some pretty “raw” material. I think of some of the things I did and ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 32:22-32, Ephesians 6:12-13

Denomination: Pentecostal

Teary Eyes, Stumbling Feet, Hands Series

Contributed by Joseph Smith on Nov 19, 2000

Deepseated shame and objective guilt arise from a self-serving spirit, but the Cross delivers us from both and frees us to live out of gratitude.

Mark it down. Memorize this. Engrave it somewhere. It is an ironclad rule. This will always happen: when it is the least convenient for you to respond, someone will want you to respond. When it is nearly impossible for you to get up and do what someone wants you to do, that is the very moment ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 116:1-19

Denomination: Baptist

Soggy Sardine Sandwich

Contributed by Dan Dunn on Dec 1, 2000

Jesus wants what you have, and who you are: when you don’t take the place in the Body of Christ that God has designed for you, that place remains empty.

You have perhaps experienced as I have, that life can be humbling sometime. A five-year-old was sitting with her grandfather in her room one day, and she asked him, “Grandpa, did God make you?” “Yes, child,” came the reply. “God made me.” The child paused for a moment, and then asked, “And ...read more

Scripture: John 6:1-13

Denomination: Methodist

A Reluctant Prophet

Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Dec 27, 2000

The story of Jonah and how it parallels our reluctance to reach the lost.

I can still the scene from Titanic where the orchestra is brought out on deck to play music while the ship is sinking. Drinks and food are passed out in the dining room to maintain a sense of normalcy. People were eating, drinking and dancing as the ship was going down. It reminds me of what ...read more

Scripture: Jonah 1:1-17

Denomination: Methodist

Tell Us Pleasant Things

Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Dec 30, 2000

The rebellious want to believe a lie, escape responsibility and avoid God, but the people of God are called to model truth and love.

Very often, on my day off, I enjoy going to the state forest near Loudonville and hiking through the woods. I put something to eat and drink in my pack and head out. I am energized by being alone where there are no phones or other means of communication — except the best communication one can ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 30:8-15

Denomination: Methodist

Easter's Surprises

Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Jan 1, 2001

What God does is eternal -- We are surprised by significance. What God does is impossible -- We are surprised by power. What God does is unexpected -- We are surprised by joy.

I will never forget walking into the funeral home several years ago to meet with the family who had just lost a 40-year-old son and husband. He was not dressed in a typical suit, but a pair of bib overhauls and a dirty ball cap. He had died of a heart attack, but in the pocket of his ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 1:1-4

Denomination: Methodist

Labor Day - Taking Christ With You

Contributed by Melvin Newland on Jan 10, 2001

One of our problems in life is that we divide everything into secular & sacred categories - but we ought to see our everyday work as a service for God.

MELVIN M. NEWLAND, MINISTER CENTRAL CHRISTIAN, BROWNSVILLE, TX TEXT: Ephesians 6:5-6; Daniel 6:20; Jeremiah 29:5-7; 1 Corinthians 5:9-11 A. For most Americans tomorrow is a holiday, it’s Labor Day, & in the opinion of some, it is the most hypocritical of all of our ...read more

Scripture: Daniel 6:20, Ephesians 6:5-6, Jeremiah 29:5-7

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

We Exist To Worship

Contributed by Chris Talton on Jan 18, 2002

This was the 1st in a 5 part series explaining the purpose of our church. The first purpose is to worship God.

May 6, 2001 Isaiah 6 “We exist to Worship” 1. True worship is not an escape from reality. (vs. 1a) It is something that happens in the midst of life. Isaiah begins this passage with the phrase, “In the year that king Uzziah died…”. King Uzziah was one of the good kings of the province ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 6:1-13

Denomination: Baptist

The Pharisee And The Tax Collector Or The Pastor And Irs Agent Series

Contributed by Joey Nelson on Feb 7, 2002

Jesus told a story in Luke’s Gospel to teach us about the irony of God’s righteousness and man’s sinfulness.

INTRODUCTION Sermonic Theme Opening Statement: There are many literary forms used in the Bible. There is poetry, proverb, legal document, dramatic narrative, hymn, sermon, theological treatise, personal letter, and apocalyptic vision. And sprinkled into all of these genres are figures of speech ...read more

Scripture: Luke 18:9-14

Nuts Passion Series

Contributed by Rick Gillespie- Mobley on Feb 18, 2002

This sermon is the first in a series of 5 dealing with the theme Never Underestimating The Spirit. This one deals with giving our all for the cause of Christ by willing to be crazy people in a normal world. I am indebted to Leaonard Sweet’s message given

Nuts Passion 2/10/2002 Psalm 116 Mark 14:3-9 I want to thank Leonard Sweets for his message given at the Beyond All Limits Pastors Conference for the inspiration behind this message. I hope to expand and make five additional messages out of this one as we are adopting the theme of NUTS ...read more

Scripture: Mark 14:3-9

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

When We Wander Too Far Series

Contributed by Ryan Johnson on Mar 6, 2002

Message for Christians that are in sin

Series: Creating Contagious Compassion When We Wander Too Far? ( evanglelism, salvation) Luke 15:3-7 Survivor Eva Hart remembers the night, April 15, 1912, on which the Titanic plunged 12,000 feet to the Atlantic floor, some two hours and forty minutes after an iceberg tore a 300-foot gash in the ...read more

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ