Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

A Retreat With Jesus

Contributed by Michael R. Hodge on Apr 14, 2012

Sermon focuses on the need for personal spiritual retreats based upon the example of Christ as He withdrew from the crowds.

Sermon Title: “A Retreat with Jesus” Emphasis: The importance of personal spiritual retreats for growing believers Written by: Rev. Michael R. Hodge – www.michaelrhodge.com Introduction As we open up God’s Word together, I invite you to begin in the book of Philippians. ...read more

Scripture: Luke 5:16

Denomination: Baptist

What Happens When I Die? Series

Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Nov 16, 2011

we can face death with confidence and peace because of all the good things we have when we die in the Lord

Luke 16:19-31 Intro: In London, many years ago, there lived a man named Solomon Peas. Upon his death, by his request, his tombstone was inscribed with this rhyme: Beneath these clods and beneath these trees, Lies the body of Solomon Peas This is not Peas; it is only his pod; Peas has shelled out ...read more

Scripture: Luke 16:19-31

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Heaven’s Best Answer To Our Worst Enemy

Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Nov 17, 2011

An Easter Sermon Jesus’ resurrection assures us that death is no longer in a position to cause us fear

Intro – A man had a checkup and then went in to see his doctor to get the results. The doctor said he better sit down – that he had bad news and worse news for him. Which did he want to hear first? The man was a bit puzzled and said he'd rather hear the bad news first. The doctor ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 90:9-11

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

The Ministry Of Encouragement Series

Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Nov 20, 2011

A book sermon from 1 Thessalonians, introducing a series through the book. To show how the ministry of deliberate encouragement is necessary to the vitality of the Body

I Thessalonians Introduction: There’s a lot of discouragement out there. Not too long ago, Hayden Planetarium in New York City issued an invitation to anyone interested in applying to be a part of the crew on the first journey to another planet. 18,000 people applied. The applications ...read more

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Maintaining Your Encouragement Output Series

Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Nov 20, 2011

Last in a series through the book. This message is a call for every person to put encouragement as a deliberate act into practice.

I Thessalonians 5:12-28 Joke – Have you heard the story about the guy who wasn’t too bright who got a job painting the lines down the middle of the highway? His first day, he finished 5 miles. Then his output dropped way off. The next day, he only finished 2; the next day, only one. ...read more

Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:12-28

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

The Message Of The Angel - ’do Not Be Afraid’

Contributed by Gordon Curley on Dec 17, 2011

The Message of the Angel - ’Do Not Be Afraid’. (Powerpoint slides to accompany this talk are available on request – email: gcurley@gcurley.info).

SERMON OUTLINE: 1. The "Do not be afraid" of the impossible. (Luke 1:13). 2. The "Do not be afraid" of unanswered prayer: (Luke 1: 30). 3. The "Do not be afraid of salvation. (Luke 2:10-11). 4. The "Do not be afraid" of obedience. (Matthew 1:20). SERMON BODY: Quote: • Researchers at Johns ...read more

Scripture: Luke 1:13-38

Denomination: Brethren

The Near-Sighted Church

Contributed by David Owens on Oct 17, 2011

In this sermon we look at what causes evangelistic near-sightedness and how to overcome that condition. This sermon is based on an excellent sermon by Dan Williams.

Introduction: A. I like the story of the policeman who pulled a lady driver over and asked for her license. 1. After looking at her license, he said, “Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses.” 2. The woman answered, “Well, I have contacts.” 3. The policeman ...read more

Scripture: John 4:34-38

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

The Life God Values Series

Contributed by C. Philip Green on Jan 28, 2012

God wants us to be productive by getting to know Him. He wants us to be strong through His strength to persevere, and He wants us to be grateful for qualifying us for heaven, rescuing us from hell and redeeming us from sin.

Sandy Y. of Bowmansville, Pennsylvania, talks about a time when her family was doing a devotional that included the story of the Ten Commandments. Her husband asked, “How many commandments did God give to Moses?” Seth, their 5-year-old son, quickly replied, “Too many!” (Sandy Y., Bowmansville, ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 1:9-14

Denomination: Evangelical Free

The Cross Of Temptation Series

Contributed by Monty Newton on Feb 28, 2012

When we understand teh nature of temptation we can fully appreciate and share in the suffering of Christ.

Title: The Cross of Temptation Text: Mark 1:9-15 (Matthew 4:1-11 and Luke 4:1-14) Thesis: When we understand the nature of temptation we can fully appreciate and share in the suffering of Christ. Lenten Season: The Season of Lent begins on Ash Wednesday and culminates with the celebration of the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 4:1-11

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Return The Favor Series

Contributed by Joel Smith on Jul 8, 2009

If you’ve received the grace of God return the favor to everyone else.

Let’s begin this morning with a little check of your vocabulary. Can someone give me a defining of the word nag? If someone accuses you of nagging them, what are they trying to tell you? Nagging is when you tell someone something that they already know. And you tell them over … and over … and ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 4:25-32

Denomination: Baptist

Staying Focused Amid Challenges

Contributed by Tim Patrick on Jul 27, 2009

This sermon teaches us how to stay focused in the midst of challenges.

Do you have trouble staying focused when challenges raise their ugly head? This is true of individuals! This is true of churches! This is true of marriages! This is true of businesses! Joke: I heard about a bride who was nervous before her wedding. It was time for the wedding and she wasn’t sure ...read more

Scripture: Acts 16:9-31

Denomination: Baptist

Fruitless Religion Series

Contributed by C. Philip Green on Feb 27, 2010

If we want to bear fruit for the glory of God and lead people to Him on a regular basis, then we must let Christ clean out the fruitless religion, and we must pray with hearts full of faith and forgiveness

A clergyman dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket, and jeans. Saint Peter says to this guy, “Who are you, so that I may know whether to admit you into the Kingdom of Heaven?” The guy replies, “I’m Joe Cohen, ...read more

Scripture: Mark 11:12-25

Denomination: Evangelical Free

The Way To God

Contributed by Derrick Thompson, Sr. on May 26, 2012

The way to God is through Jesus Christ who is the way. Long before we were born, God was thinhking about us, we are important to God, and we are fearfully and wonderfully made by Him.

First Church of god in Harvey Sunday Morning April 22nd, 2012 Let us pray Welcome….….. This is the day which the Lord hath made, we will rejoice and be glad in it. Some people come to church to see their friends, but I came to praise the Lord. Some people come to church to jump and ...read more

Scripture: John 14:1-7

Denomination: Church Of God

God Was His Father, But Joseph Was His Dad

Contributed by Denn Guptill on Jun 17, 2012

We all know that Jesus was the son of God, but he was raised by Joseph.

Father’s Day 2012 (Video for Luke I am your father) “I am your father” probably one of the greatest scenes in movie history. For most of us we know who our dad is, or at least we assume we do. My father used to tell me that I belonged to the Milk man in Chatham NB, he said that ...read more

Scripture: Luke 2:41-52

Denomination: Wesleyan

What's Next? What Is Hell Like? Series

Contributed by Dennis Mcconnaughhay on Aug 31, 2009

What’s Next? What Happens after we die? Hell is an Awful Place! Part 3 of 7

INTRODUCTION 1. Heaven is an Awesome Place! Our study last week was Inspiring and Motivating… I was hoping that thought of Heaven would stay in our hearts… HOPE! • My desire in this study is to deepen our Hope for Heaven… that we’d understand that Heaven is far better than anything we’ve known, ...read more

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ