Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

The Dawning Of A New Day - Easter 2004

Contributed by Steven Dow on Apr 8, 2004

The day of Jesus resurrection dawned with a hope that conquers disbelief, a faith than conquers doubt, a life that conquers death and a purpose that conquers despair.

THE DAWNING OF A NEW DAY Easter Sunday Matthew 28:1-10 April 11, 2004 Introduction: A Sunday School teacher was attempting to teach her young students the true meaning of Easter. "Why do we celebrate Easter?" she asked. When the children replied ’because of the Easter bunny,’ Easter eggs, ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 28:1-10

How To Share Your Faith Without Being A Jerk Series

Contributed by Timothy Peck on Mar 8, 2001

Four important principles for sharing our faith in Jesus without being obnoxious about it in a postmodern context.

(Note: This sermon was introduced with a drama called "Nail The Pagan). The reason we laugh  at satire is because there’s an element of truth in it. Sometimes in our enthusiasm to share the good news of Jesus Christ with others we can tend to come across like outreach commandos. We can come off ...read more

Scripture: Romans 10:14-21, Romans 9:1-3

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Phonies In The Church

Contributed by Dr. Ronald Shultz on Mar 17, 2001

How to deal with false prophets.

Phonies In The Church People get too excited about nut cases, which claim to be prophets of God and various other lads/lassies that get into all sorts of scams and jams. Many people lose faith because their hero or favorite alma mater takes a nosedive. First, none of us are exempt from ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 4:1-5

Denomination: Baptist

Profile Of End Time Man

Contributed by Dr. Ronald Shultz on May 1, 2001

Of course, we live in perilous times.

Profile of End Time Man Evolutionists speak of Cro-Magnon man and Neanderthal man, so I decided to use the term of End Time man for this lesson. Some Baptists call each other Neanderthals and I thank God that I am a Neanderthal and not one of the other group. It also seemed fitting since the ...read more

Scripture: 2 Timothy 3:1-9

Denomination: Baptist

Run For Your Life

Contributed by Chuck Morley on Feb 4, 2001

Lot’s example for the believer to break from the bondage of Sodom and sin.

"And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city. And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon the hand of his wife, and upon the hand of his two daughters; the Lord ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 19:15-17

Denomination: Pentecostal

Christian Civics 101 Series

Contributed by Timothy Peck on Jun 11, 2001

The most important principle about our relationship to our government.

(Note: This sermon was introduced with the song "Fellow Prisoners" by Michael Card from the Soul Anchor CD and a slide show about persecution of Christians in the world). It’s sobering to realize that so many people who confess the name of Jesus in the world today are being persecuted for their ...read more

Scripture: Romans 13:1-7

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

How To Behave In Church Series

Contributed by Brian Bill on Mar 19, 2003

We’re to respect other believers and strive to live in peace with everyone. We’re also called to communicate what people need to hear, remembering to be patient with everyone.

How to Behave in Church I enjoy collecting bulletin bloopers. I’ve shared some in the past and have recently come across some brand new ones: Attend church and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch. [I hope that’s not a reference to our potluck that follows the second ...read more

Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:12-15

Denomination: Baptist

Praying For The Right Things Series

Contributed by Brian Bill on Mar 19, 2003

In the light of the Lord’s impending return, we’re to pray that our faith will grow and that our love will increase. Since those who don’t know God will be punished when Christ appears, we must avoid mediocre spirituality and apathetic prayers.

Praying for the Right Things One of my favorite commercials is for a cell phone company in which cellular static has caused some confusion between a married couple. The wife had just asked her husband to bring home “a movie, something old.” The husband however, thought she said, “Bring home a ...read more

Scripture: 2 Thessalonians 1:1-12

Denomination: Baptist

Can You Pass A Camel Through The Eye Of A Needle? Series

Contributed by David Dykes on Mar 31, 2003

Jesus didn’t ask everyone he met to follow him. He asked the original twelve disciples–and He invited the Rich Young Ruler to follow him. The young man refused. Like many people, he was fooling himself about what it takes to have eternal life.

Can You Pass a Camel Through the Eye of a Needle? Luke 18:18-30 By Dr. David O. Dykes INTRODUCTION During this Christmas season, there are plenty of Scrooges out there. I heard about one lady who was fumbling in her purse to get her credit card to pay for a purchase. The cashier noticed she had a ...read more

Scripture: Luke 18:18-30

Denomination: Baptist

P.u.s.h.--Pray Until Something Happens! Series

Contributed by David Dykes on Mar 31, 2003

In this parable, we learn the value of positive, persistent prayer and the need for prayer in our lives.

P.U.S.H. – Pray Until Something Happens! Luke 18:1-8 By Dr. David O. Dykes INTRODUCTION A young man went into a drugstore to buy 3 boxes of chocolate: small, medium, and large. When the pharmacist asked him about the three boxes, he said, “Well, I’m going over to a new girlfriend’s house for ...read more

Scripture: Luke 18:1-8, Luke 18:1-18, Romans 12:9-13

Denomination: Baptist

Lessons From A Leper Series

Contributed by David Dykes on Apr 3, 2003

We all have a deadly problem only Jesus can fix. When we admit our need and cry out for Jesus, stepping out in faith, we receive the power to accomplish the directions God gives us according to the Bible.

Lessons from a Leper Luke 17:11-19 by David O. Dykes INTRODUCTION Have you ever had a totally lousy day? I read about a man who was sitting in a bar, looking at his drink. He stayed like that for half-an-hour. Then, a big trouble-making truck driver stepped up next to him, grabbed the drink from ...read more

Scripture: Luke 17:11-19

Denomination: Baptist

Devastation To Resurrection

Contributed by Mike Hays on Apr 2, 2002

Jesus had promised that He would overcome the grave, but those who loved Him so could not understand how pain and sorrow could ever translate into joy and salvation.

Devastation To Resurrection John 20:1-16 It had been a week of emotion. There was the fever pitched frenzy of adoring crowds lining the streets, shouting, “Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!” as they welcomed Jesus on Palm Sunday. While the excitement lingered, the crowd ...read more

Scripture: John 20:1-16

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

What On Earth Am I Here For? Series

Contributed by D. Greg Ebie on Apr 26, 2005

40 Days of Purpose (Rick Warren) The question “What on earth am I here for” can be broken down into three questions. These are some of the ultimate questions people ask: [1] The question of existence: why am I alive? [2] The question of signi

What on Earth Am I Here For? 40 Days of Purpose Ecclesiastes 8:1, 15 INTRODUCTION: As we begin our 40 Days of Purpose we want to consider “What on Earth Am I Here For?” Video Clip: Everybody Loves Raymond So do you ever feel like your only purpose is to open a jar of pickles, or kill a spider? ...read more

Scripture: Ecclesiastes 8:1-15

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Dont Go Flying Off The Handle

Contributed by Val Black on Oct 29, 2005

(NOTE: This is not entirely my own sermon. Ive gleaned much from a book of sermons and have added my own thoughts.) Here is a brief description: Based on 2 Kings 6:1-7. A student of Elisha lost a borrowed axehead and was troubled by it. Every B

DONT GO FLYING OFF THE HANDLE! 2 Kings 6:1-7 And the sons of the prophets said unto Elisha, Behold now, the place where we dwell with thee is too strait for us.2 Let us go, we pray thee, unto Jordan, and take thence every man a beam, and let us make us a place there, where we may dwell. And he ...read more

Scripture: 2 Kings 6:1-7

Denomination: Charismatic

"The Business Of The Church"

Contributed by Clark Tanner on Jan 9, 2006

The Glory of the Father, Eternal life for men, Preservation and unity of the saints.

John 17:3 (NASB95) 3 “This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent. It is impossible that any simply human heart would begin to comprehend what passed between God the Father and God the Son with the words, “Father, the hour has come”. ...read more

Scripture: John 17:3

Denomination: Orthodox