Sermons on Crude Joking:

The Rich Man And Lazarus

Contributed by Ivan Robinson on Dec 21, 2000

Sermon to address the fact that the rich man and Lazarus is a parable

THE RICH MAN AND LAZARUS LUKE 16:19 I) Introduction A man was walking on the beach one afternoon kicking up the sand, discussed with certain things. There on the beach was a bottle and as he walked he kicked the bottle into the surf. POP>>>> Out of the bottle came a mysterious being... a Jeannie. ...read more

Scripture: Luke 16:19-31

Denomination: Adventist

Guarding The Sabbath Doors Series

Contributed by Russell Brownworth on Feb 13, 2003

We live in a hurried, frustrating world. What can bring peace in such an environment? Answer: Sabbath

February 16, 2003 In those days saw I in Judah [some] treading wine presses on the Sabbath, and bringing in sheaves, and lading asses; as also wine, grapes, and figs, and all [manner of] burdens, which they brought into Jerusalem on the Sabbath day: and I testified [against them] in the day ...read more

Scripture: Nehemiah 13:15-22

Denomination: United Methodist

Star Trek: The Next Generation

Contributed by David Petticrew on Mar 4, 2003

Contrasting the Magi with Herod to show the acceptance of outsiders in the Kingdom of God and a warning to the insiders to be careful.

Introduction Ever since I first started preached I have longed to preach this sermon, or rather a sermon with this title. It just struck me as the perfect title for a sermon on the story on magi’s visit to Jesus, Star Trek, but then it is not only about the story of the magi but about how the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 2:1-12

Denomination: Holiness

Believing For The Impossilble Series

Contributed by Jason Pettibone on Apr 29, 2002

Trust God for everything

Believing God for the Impossible Hebrews 11: 29 Some of the most popular shows on TV are what we call ‘reality based’ programs including a series called World’s Most Amazing Videos. We like those shows because we are able to see people do things and survive incidents that look impossible. ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 11:29

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Introduction To The Book Of Romans

Contributed by John Stensrud on Sep 22, 2002

A 3-part introduction to the Book of Romans

INTRODUCTION TO THE BOOK OF ROMANS An independent woman started her own business. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in. Pretty soon she realized she needed an in-house counsel, and so she began interviewing young lawyers. "As I’m sure you can understand," she started off with ...read more

Denomination: Baptist

The World's Most Acceptable Sin Series

Contributed by John Hamby on Oct 24, 2002

Worry is the painful preoccupation with the consequences of what “might” happen. The Lord forces us to think about why we are not to worry in these verses.

A Study of the Book of Luke Sermon # 33 The World’s Most Acceptable Sin Luke 12:22-34 Worry is the number one mental disorder in America. “The Mayo Clinic claims 80-85% of total caseload is due directly to worry and anxiety. Many experts ...read more

Scripture: Luke 12:22-34

Denomination: Baptist

Faithful Fathers

Contributed by Eric Snyder on Oct 25, 2002

Abraham

Abraham, a picture of a Father, Genesis 22 Eric A. Snyder, Farwell Church of Christ, June 16, 2002 Three boys were bragging about their fathers. The first one said, "My father runs so fast he can fire an arrow, start running, and get there before the arrow!" The second one said, "That’s ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 22:1-22

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

The Horrors Of Hell

Contributed by Donnie Martin on Aug 17, 2003

Hell is a horrible place for a number of reasons, but I seek to reveal its horridness by dealing with (1)The Masses In Hell, (2)The Memories In Hell, and (3)The Miseries In Hell.

THE HORRORS OF HELL Text: Rev.20: 15 and Rev.21: 8 Intro: The term “hell” is used in a variety of ways these days; most of them negative. Often this word is thrown around casually like it was no big deal. Many people even joke about Hell. Some have been heard saying that they didn’t ...read more

Scripture: Revelation 20:15, Revelation 21:8

Denomination: Baptist

Two Builders - Two Foundations Series

Contributed by Joey Nelson on Feb 7, 2002

Jesus had just finished giving the infamous Sermon on the Mount. He so desperately wanted His audience to go and do what He had just taught them because He wanted to implement His kingdom of righteousness on earth. So he tells a story for his conclusion.

INTRODUCTION Sermonic Theme Opening Statement: Form is meaning in the Bible. The way something is written or said indicates its meaning. I need you to help me make this point. If I say, “Once upon a time…” you expect a story. If I say, “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today….” you expect a ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 7:24-27

David, Low, Tough, And Tender Series

Contributed by Edwin Amundson on Aug 9, 2002

Our Hero of the faith today, David, will teach us a lesson in humility, but also a lesson in strength and faith.

HEROES OF THE FAITH 7: ?DAVID---LOW, TOUGH AND TENDER! 1 SAMUEL 16:6-12 JOKE--- Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the ...read more

Scripture: 1 Samuel 16:6-12

Denomination: Baptist

The Holy Innocents

Contributed by Kristopher Morris on Dec 26, 2003

This soon after celebrating Christmas we read the account of Herod’s slaughter of Bethlehem’s baby boys. What does this tragic story mean for us today?

The Holy Innocents Matthew 2: 1-18 December 28, 2003 Two weeks ago on my drive to church, the radio broadcast some spectacular news. I had to double check the dial to make sure this wasn’t some early morning comedian telling a joke. Nope, it was NPR, and yes it seemed what they were ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 2:1-18

Denomination: Lutheran

The Bonds Of Bitterness

Contributed by Jerry Shirley on Oct 16, 2004

Bitterness will DEVASTATE you spiritually/DESTROY you physically/DISCOURAGE you emotionally/DIVIDE the fellowship/DEPRIVE you of blessings/DEFILE your relationships! Powerpoint at website.

The Bonds of Bitterness Eph. 4:31 Has someone ever said or done something to you for which you found it difficult to forgive them? Every time their very name is brought up, even if it was years ago, it still brings butterflies to your stomach. When you think of them, your heart rate increases. ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 4:31

Denomination: Baptist

When Your World Collapses

Contributed by Edwin Amundson on Sep 18, 2001

In response to the terrorist attacks on NY and WA, this sermon attempts to help people learn to lean on God in times of trouble.

WHEN YOUR WORLD COLLAPSES---PSALMS 34:15-19 JOKE---In memory of those who’s lives were stolen in a murderous act of war, at the WTC, the Pentagon, and in the hills of New Jersey, there will be no joke this week. Instead, I simply ask you to observe with me a moment of silence. INTRO--- There is ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 34:15-21, 2 Chronicles 16:9

Denomination: Baptist

If I've Got It - Why Can't I Flaunt It? Series

Contributed by Jeff Strite on Jul 12, 2004

God hates boastfulness. But what so wrong with a little bragging if you’ve got a special talent or ability?

OPEN: An older woman was cruising a busy parking lot in her new Mercedes-Benz looking in vain for a parking space. She finally saw someone loaded with packages heading for a car, so she followed him, put on her blinker and waited patiently until he pulled out. Just as he pulled out a young man ...read more

Scripture: Jeremiah 9:23-24

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Moments At The Cross

Contributed by Kent Lenard on Apr 13, 2003

This sermon deals with the need for Christians to take the things that create problems in their relationshhip with God the Cross and leave them there.

Moments at the Cross Rom 11:27, 1 John 1:9, 1 Cor 13:5, Col 3:13, Rom 8:32, John 14:1-3 April 8, 2003 I. In the last few weeks I have taken us to the Cross several times to look at the different articles that are have something to do with Jesus’ death. A. We have looked at the spit of ...read more

Scripture: Romans 11:27, 1 John 1:9

Denomination: Baptist