(Section 5) Enjoying, Enduring, Or Dissolving Series

RELATIONSHIPS AND MARRIAGE

V. ENJOYING, ENDURING, OR DISSOLVING

INTRODUCTION

Marriage can be the most happy, mediocre, or unhappy of life's experiences. God designed the opposite sexes to complement each other. He wanted a man and woman to be joined in marriage so that they might each give to the other what each one lacked. But these differences that can complement and blend two unique individuals into one can also be incompatibilities that divide and cause separation instead of oneness.

Tim Lahaye How to be Happy Though Married Intro

A. ENJOYING

Introduction: For every ten marriages occurring in America today, five will end in bitter conflict and divorce. That is tragic . . . but have you ever wondered what happens to the other five? Do they sail blissfully into the sunset? Hardly! According to clinical psychologist Neil Warren, who appeared on "Focus on the Family", all five will stay together for a lifetime, but in varying degrees, of disharmony. He quoted the research of Dr. John Cuber whose findings were published in a book entitled The Significant Americans. Cuber learned that some couples will remain married for the benefit of the children, while others will pass the years in relative apathy. Incredibly, only one or two out of ten will achieve what might be called "intimacy" in the relationship. By intimacy Dr. Warren is referring to the mystical bond of friendship, commitment, and understanding that almost defies explanation. It occurs when a man and woman, being separate and distinct individuals, are fused into a single unit which the Bible calls "one flesh." Love For A Lifetime Dr. James C. Dobson 1987 pg 14-15

1. To enjoy marriage, one must first enjoy the One who ordained marriage and

Made male and female.

Genesis 2:24

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave

unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

But this one flesh, must serve the one God. No marriage is complete

Without God in the center bonding the male and female in a special way

not understood by the world. --- "they shall be one flesh."

-- According to a survey of Christian marriages taken by Dr. Pitirim

Sorokin of Harvard University, where "the family practice of Bible study

and prayer is daily observed, there is only one divorce in every 1015

marriages." pg 49

Someone has said, "You can't quarrel with the woman you have prayed

with every day." pg 126

How to be Happy Though Married Tim LaHaye 1968 Living Books

No man can walk in the Spirit and be mad at his wife (Galatians 5:16). pg 121

How to be Happy Though Married Tim LaHaye 1968 Living Books

Many young marrieds get so involved in each other and the acquisition of things for their home that they neglect Christian service. pg 47

How to be Happy Though Married Tim LaHaye 1968 Living Books

2. MALES AND FEMALES DIFFER BIOLOGICALLY

To enjoy marriage, you must recognize that males and females differ biologically.

Biological differences between the sexes:

1. Men and women differ in every cell of their bodies. This difference in the chromosome combination is the basic cause of development into maleness or femaleness as the case may be.

2. Woman has greater constitutional vitality, perhaps because of this chromosome difference. Normally, she outlives man by three of four years, in the U.S.

3. The sexes differ in their basal metabolism--that of woman being normally lower than that

of a man.

4. They differ in skeletal structure, woman having a shorter head, broader face, chin less

protruding, shorter legs, and longer trunk. The first finger of a woman's hand is usually longer than the third; with men the reverse is true. Boys' teeth last longer than do those of girls.

5. Woman has a larger stomach, kidneys, liver, and appendix, and smaller lungs.

6. In functions, woman has several very important ones totally lacking in man--menstruation, pregnancy, lactation. All of these influence behavior and feeling. She has more different hormones than does man. The same gland behaves differently in the two sexes—thus

woman's thyroid is larger and more active; it enlarges during pregnancy but also during

menstruation; it makes her more prone to goiter, provides resistance to cold, is associated with the smooth skin, relatively hairless body, and thin layer of subcutaneous fat which are important elements in the concept of personal beauty. It also contributes to emotional instability---she laughs and cries more easily.

--Note on menstruation

In any large group of women of child-bearing age, 18% will be menstruating at any one

time. Against this percentage, autopsies of women suicides find that 40%, 50%, even 60% were menstruating at the time they took their own lives.

Love For A Lifetime Dr. James C. Dobson 1987 pg 41

Dr. Katherine Dalton, in The Premenstrual Syndrome summarizes many studies of