Reflection On The Journey Of Life: A Mysterious And Beautiful Christianity

The simple act of going for a walk can be such an engaging experience. I need it actually, after the long day. So many days are spent doing mindless tasks repetitively. It's like my mind unleashes during the long night walks. I wish I could do it more often. But winter is coming. And the nights will be cold.

It's beautiful out. Darkness is beautiful. The trees are beautiful. The moments are often quite beautiful. There is so much work to be done. And so few to do it.

Life is so mysterious. There are so many paradoxes. It's so easy to get sucked into the daily go, go, go. And there are so many screens. There are so many glowing screens that we all stare at. What I wonder is really going on here? How can I understand the world from my Christian worldview, through the Bible, which is in fact the truth about life?

What's really happening out there? Yes, out there, on the streets, in the world? What does everything really mean? I know what I've been told it all means. But I was brought up into a naturalistic view of the world. Now I realize and understand that materialism is a veil, it's not the truth about life. Christianity is the truth about everything, I've come to know. How does that impact literally everything? Because assuming it's true, it does affect everything fundamentally.

I can't put it in any box. I can't get close enough to God. We act like we can see God in his fullness now. But we can't. Christ is given freely, the Spirit is given, but the fullness of the presence and dominion of God is shrouded. So we live indirectly in the presence of God now, with the promise of the completeness of His presence later. And a remade universe, a remade Earth. One thing is certain: More will be revealed.

It's a fight to remain in the truth. The world has a lot of allurements. At times, especially when frustrated or depressed, I can feel the call of it. The call to do what feels good in the short term. It's so powerful at times. The temptations are real.

The temptation hangs out there. And it's like I'm starving in the desert, sun scorched skin, and a mouth as dry as the sierra desert. That temptation looks so sweet, like a jug of fine swedish spring water. Or a decadent cupcake. Or a beautiful woman in her prime. It's insanely alluring. And I'm exhausted, physically, mentally, frustrated, half-awake, pessimistic, and I just want something, anything to feel good for just a moment. But that temptation is a lie. It is not water in the desert, it's poison in the desert. It's a spiked waterhole, it's salt water to hasten my demise.

I may find myself in the desert like Jesus in ministry, in the Christian life. Let us not forget that it was the Spirit who led Jesus into the desert. It was a time of testing that would end with angels gathered around to tend to his wounds.

The temptation in the desert is offered as a permanent stay in the desert, disguised as a temporary escape.

Let's continue.

Rebuilding a broken empire (myself) is in fact quite difficult. But I have help. The struggles are very visceral and real. Life becomes very real on this journey. It's too real. The best way to describe it is that it's like the gnashing of teeth. It's like gritting my teeth, grinding them hard, when they shouldn't be grinding at all, just to get through everyday. Everyday... oi vey, full of awkward moments, difficult decisions, tense situations where I could just crawl out of my skin. It's very tough. Too many moments I feel filled with a sense of discouragement. Perhaps more so, a sense that things won't work out as I want them to. Which happens to be true, they won't work out how I want them to, they'll work out how God wants them to.

Yet a general sense of discomfort haunts me through life, a sense of unease. Discomfort with life I suppose is what it is, with how things go everyday, discomfort with society, media, and the crumbling culture around me.

Better strap on the armor of God, because it ain't gonna get any easier! The darkness descends. The dark rift. We live in a time in history when western man turns away from God. We live in a time of corruption, starvation, human trafficking, unborn child sacrifice, and utter confusion. Things seem to be falling apart don't they? But often in history, when things seem to be falling apart, they are actually coming together.

I sat in the home of a retired minister, asking her about her copy of the works of Josephus. She said that she doesn't envy the difficult times that are ahead for my generation. I thought for a few moments, and I said,"Well, maybe we're made for the times we're in."