"choosing To Forgive"

“Choosing to Forgive”

Matthew 18:21-35

Ever have one of those days, months or years when nothing seems to go right?

I mean, it’s like, no matter what you do somebody is mad at you.

And you really are trying as hard as you can, but it only seems to make things worse.

What do you do?

Usually, I’m my own worst enemy.

I really don’t want to be.

I want everything to run smoothly; I want to do God’s will and I want people to flock to Jesus.

I want this church to grow and this community to get turned on to Jesus, His love, transforming power and the joy of serving Him.

But then I feel like I get in the way—not on purpose—but I get in the way.

I maybe make people angry at me.

I don’t want this to happen, but it happens.

Have you ever felt like no matter how bad you don’t want to—you feel like you seem to get in the way of God’s message more than you do in being one through whom God’s message is made clear and attractive and convicting?

I have a hard time forgiving myself when I do this.

How about you?

I hold grudges against me!

And then, as others hold grudges against me as well I feel even more horrible.

Uggh!

When is it going to end?

When am I ever going to get it right?

Or better yet, am I ever going to get it right?

This ministry stuff is hard.

This loving stuff is hard.

Life is hard.

But, I know Jesus.

I know Him just enough to always be wanting more.

And so, as Paul writes in Philippians 3, “I press on…I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me…

…I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.

But one thing I do.

Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

I press on.

I think Peter was having kind of a bad day or a bad week or a bad month when he came to Jesus in our Gospel Lesson for this morning.

Maybe a whole bunch of people were getting mad at him.

Maybe he was trying his very best, but it wasn’t good enough for some.

And it’s hard to forgive people when they get mad at you and say all kinds of hurtful things about you.

It’s difficult when you are trying so very hard and people still think you are some kind of nincompoop.

I know how it feels to be a nincompoop in other people’s eyes, how about you?

It’s not fun.

It eats at your self-esteem.

It makes you want to quite—but you know you can’t.

Because Christ’s love compels you.

So, Peter comes up to Jesus and asks Him: “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me?

Up to seven times?”

And, again I think we all know this question from our own experience.

We’ve all asked this in one way or another.

I mean, being sinned against, being offended, being wounded, being wronged by someone still happens the same way it did some 2,000 years ago when Peter was asking this question.

We have the same vices, we open the same wounds with each other…

…with our harsh words…

…with our inconsiderate words…

…with our manipulating actions and our raging tempers and our disregard, neglect and abuse.

The damage that comes from these things is probably similar to the sting and the pain that we feel that makes us ask: “How much more of this do I have to take?”

This is a little bit of what I detect in Peter’s question, how about you?

“When is enough—enough?” is a question we probably all wonder when we are really hurt, when we are wronged.

“How many times do I have to forgive?

How long do I have to put up with this?”

(pause)

Talking about forgiveness is deeply personal, not just to some degree but to many different degrees.

When we say “forgive,” one person might be thinking of their significant other who left the lights on and now the electric bill is going up.

But then, someone else in this sanctuary might be thinking about someone who is angry at them.

And they have asked for forgiveness from this person, but the person just won’t let them off the hook.

And that hurts.

It leaves us baffled.

“I didn’t mean to make them mad at me.”

“If I’d a known that what I was doing was going to anger them and make them hate me or not want to be around me…I’d have moved heaven and earth to do things differently.”