Understanding Women, Understanding Men (Part 2)
Ephesians 5:22-33
Sermon by: Rick Crandall
Preached at McClendon Baptist Church
West Monroe, LA
Nov. 13, 2005
*Tonight we continue our study on understanding women & understanding men.
-And yes we can do it.
*Think about trying to keep a car running right.
-I don’t know how to do even simple repairs on an engine, but I can get the right manual and find out what to do.
*I went to the library to check one out for tonight, but they wanted a $65 deposit for that book!
-That’s a valuable book, but here in our hands we’ve got a priceless book.
*It can help us understand the most important things in life.
-It can even help us understand men & women.
--So if we really want to understand men & women, we have to take a look at the Book & follow God’s plan
1. And the first thing we see is that God calls wives to submissive love.
-(This is in vs. 22-24.)
*These verses have been distorted by a lot of men, and discarded by a lot of women, but they are important to help us live together in love.
-And as I said last week, one main reason why is because God created men with a built in need to be respected.
--Men respond to respect.
*All things being equal, it motivates us, it charges us up, challenges us, and helps us to be the men we were created to be.
-It helps us be the husband you want us to be.
*So ladies, let’s go deeper.
-How are you going to show submissive love?
-The key is in the last part of verse 22: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”
*My wife Mary’s submission to me is a reflection of her submission to the Lord.
-She can submit to me, because she has already submitted her life to the Lord.
*Of course, it helps when I act like the Lord!
-And I don’t always do that.
--Men, we get it wrong sometimes don’t we?
*I really like the story Ed Boland tells about a wedding that his pastor performed.
-Unfortunately, he forgot the groom’s first name.
--He just could not remember if it was “James” or “John.”
*I’ve never done that, but I did ask one poor bride to take the groom to be her wedded wife.
-Fortunately, she had enough sense to not repeat after me, and eventually, I figured out what I was doing wrong.
*Well, this pastor forgot the groom’s first name.
-And the pastor said: -“I knew I would have to ask him.
*So I said, Is your name James or John?”
-“James,” the groom said.
*Then his bride nudged him gently & said, “Your name is John.” (1)
*We don’t always get it right, do we guys?
-Not by a long shot.
*But when our wives submit to our leadership in a Godly way.
-Then it brings glory to God & grace to our families.
2. So God calls wives to submissive love, and He calls men to the Savior’s love.
-(We see this in vs. 25-29.)
*Men: We can see clearly here that God gives the greatest responsibility to us.
-We are to love our wives the way Jesus Christ loves us.
1-That means we are to have a love that’s supreme.
*In John 15:13, Jesus said, “Greater love has no man than this, for a man to lay down his life for his friends.”
*Jesus Christ gave His life on the Cross for us.
-He made the ultimate sacrifice for us.
--And that is the kind of love He wants us to have for our wives.
2-Love her with a supreme love, but also love her with a serving love.
*In verse 26, we see Jesus washing the church with the water of His Word.
-And one of the most memorable things the Lord did on the night before He went to the Cross was this:
--He got up from supper, got a towel & a bowl of water, and began to wash the disciples’ feet.
*Jesus loves us with a serving love, and that’s the way He wants you to love your wife.
*I like Bob Dole, former Senator & hero from WW2.
-At age 21, Senator Dole was severely wounded on a hill in the Italian mountains just two weeks before the end of the war.
--He was trying to pull his radioman to safety.
*Over the next 3 years, he was not expected to survive.
-He lost a kidney, lost the use of his right arm, and most of the feeling in his left arm, but God blessed him to recover.
--And the best I can tell, he is a good man with a delightful sense of humor.
*When Bob was running for President in 1996, an article about Bob & his wife, Elizabeth appeared in a magazine.
-Along with the article, there was a picture of Bob & Elizabeth making the bed together.
*Well, a male reader of the magazine wrote to Bob Dole & expressed his great disappointment that Dole would allow himself to be photographed in such a "compromising" position!
-Making the bed with his wife.
*Senator Dole wrote back to the man & said: “You don’t know the half of it. The only reason Elizabeth was helping at all was because the photographer was in the room.” (2)
*Guys, the truth is that almost all of us need to do more around the house.
3-God wants us to love our wives with a serving love, but also with a supplying love.
*God has promised to supply all of our needs, and He wants us to supply our wife’s needs.
-So, in verses 26&27, we see the Lord doing great things for the church.
--Then in verses 28&29, the Lord asks us to take care of our wives, just as we would our own body, nourishing her, cherishing her, carefully protecting her.
*Jesus Christ takes care of His church!
-And He wants us to take care of our wives the same way.
*Men, Deut 24:5 says that we are to cheer up the wife that we have taken.
4-So God wants us to love our wives with a supplying love, but also with a sure & steady love: -Always there, always faithful.
*Can you imagine Jesus Christ being unfaithful to His church?
-Never! --And He wants us to always be true to our wives.
*Love your wife with a love that is sure, supplying, serving & supreme.
-Your wife wants you to love her like that, but much more important, God wants you to love her like that.
--He created her with a built in need to be loved like that.
3. So God calls men to the Savior’s love, but He also calls marriages to a sacred link.
-(We see this in vs. 28-32)
*They 2 shall be 1 flesh.
-There is a sacred link between husband & wife.
--There is a sacred link between marriage & the church.
1-God designed this link to be a living example.
*So when read these vs., we can see a link between our families & the Family of God, especially in verses 31&32.
*God definitely uses our human relationships to point us to Heavenly relationships, so He created marriage to be a picture of the relationship between Jesus & the church.
-Christ is the Bridegroom & the church is the bride of Christ.
*God is trying to give us an upward look, a heavenward look in the everyday things in life.
2-God designed the marriage link to be a living example, and that’s why it’s meant to be a life-long experience.
*I’m not trying to beat-up on divorced people tonight.
-No one has to tell you the problems that go along with divorce.
*Thank God there is mercy & grace, but it helps us all to look at marriage from a spiritual point of view, and see why God doesn’t want us to divorce.
-Can you imagine Jesus Christ divorcing the church?
--No.
*And He wants us to commit to a life-long marriage.
-The same attitude Ruth showed even after her husband had died, when she told Naomi, “Entreat me not to leave you, or to return from following after you. For where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people & your God my God.” (Ruth 1:16)
*It’s the attitude Jeff Strite found in the story of a young man & his fiancée.
-They went to the courthouse to apply for their marriage license, and after they filled out all the papers, the clerk said, “This license is good for 30 days.”
*The future groom was shocked & said: “No, you don’t understand! We want one that’s ‘till death do us part!” (3)
*God wants your marriage to be both a living example and a life-long experience.
4. That’s why He calls marriages to this sacred link.
*But He calls everyone to spiritual life.
-(And we can see that life in vs. 32)
*Christ & the church: the church that He loves, the church that He died for, the church that will spend all eternity with Him.
-God wants you to be part of His church.
*He wants that so much, that the Father was willing to send His only begotten Son to die on the Cross for us.
-And Jesus Christ was willing to come.
*He was willing to die on the Cross for us, because He loves His Father, and because He loves us.
-Nobody could possibly love you more than Jesus Christ already does!
--Think of that love.
*Pastor E.V. Hill & his wife, Jane gave us a picture of this love.
*After many years of marriage, Jane passed away from cancer in 1987.
-Dr. Hill described his wife as a partner that made him a better man.
--And he always cherished the night that she was also his protector.
*E.V. had received death threats due to his working with gangs in inner city L.A.
-One night he got word that he would be killed the next day.
*E.V. went to sleep & woke up thankful to be alive, but he noticed his wife was gone.
-Then he looked outside & saw the car was also gone.
--A short time later, his wife came driving up & he asked where she had been.
*Jane Edna said it occurred to her that the bad guys might put a bomb in his car, and if he got in it the next morning he’d be blown away, so she got up and drove the car all night.
*What a great example of love!
-And a tiny drop of the love that Jesus Christ has for us.
--He took our place, so that we could be delivered from eternal death.
*Jesus Christ loves you.
-Don’t miss out on His life-changing love.
Conclu:
*Give your life to Jesus Christ
-Trust Him, follow Him.
--And live every day with a growing love for Him.
*That is the greatest step to understanding you will ever take.
1. -- Edward C. Boland, Leadership, Vol. 1, no. 2. - Found on Bible Illustrator Topic: Marriage / Subtopic: / Index: 1620-1621 Date: 12/1997.2209 / Title: Humor: A Groom By Any Other Name
2. Dr. Richard Meyer, “Break a Vase” - Found on sermonillustrations.com
3. Adapted from Sermon Central Sermon: “Total Commitment” by Jeff Strite - Ruth 1:16-17
4. Adapted from Sermon Central Sermon: “There is Strength in Weakness” by Ray Ellis - Judges 6:11-7:25
