The Virtue of Self-Control
Part 10
The Core Virtues of the Christian Life
Galatians 5:22-23
Jeff Armbrester
(I appreciate the sermon "Strawberry of Self-Control" by James Westervelt, which is on this site. His outline inspired me as I prepared this message. I encourage you read his sermon as well.)
22But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness, and self-control. Here there is no conflict with the law. (New Living Translation)
During his term as President of the U.S., Lyndon Johnson was somewhat overweight. One day his wife challenged him with this blunt assertion: "You can’t run the country if you can’t run yourself." Respecting Mrs. Johnson’s wise observation, the President lost 23 pounds.
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The virtue of self-control is one that we long for, yet few attain it. In fact, most people do not even try because they don’t want to say “no” to themselves. Self-control, while it is highly respected and greatly desired, is tough.
As tough as self-control is, we know that without it, we create many troubles for ourselves. Ask Admiral Phipps, commander of the British fleet in 1750. When the British and French were fighting in Canada, Admiral Phipps was commanded to anchor outside of Quebec. He was given orders to wait for the British land forces to arrive. Then he was to support them when they attacked the city. Phipps’ navy arrived early. As the admiral waited, he became annoyed by the statues of the saints that adorned the towers of a nearby cathedral. So, he commanded his men to shoot at them with the ships’ cannons. No one knows how many rounds were fired or how many statues were knocked out, but when the land forces arrived and the signal was given to attack, the admiral was of no help. He had used up all his ammunition shooting at the "saints."
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Have you been there? How many times have we gave in to the tyranny of the urgent to later find ourselves not being able to fulfill our responsibility or dream? Rather than wait until we can afford it, we pull out the credit card and buy it too soon. Rather than wait for further instructions, we move forward in our own wisdom thinking we’ll please the boss only to discover the plans had been changed. Rather than wait on God to fulfill his promise, we decide God needs a little help, so we take action and create a mess.
That’s what happened to Abraham. He and Sarah waited for the promised son, but each month nothing happened. Finally after a long wait, Sarah came up with a plan. She gave her maid, Hagar, to her husband and told him to have a son through Hagar. Abraham agreed. Ishmael was born. And God said, “No.” Ishmael will not be the promised son. Soon afterward, Sarah was pregnant with Isaac. Because Abraham and Sarah didn’t exercise self-control, havoc was created. The result of their inability to wait on God, created a sibling rivalry that escalated to hatred and war that continues to this day in the Middle East.
Granted, our times of not controlling ourselves will not create problems that big. However, the problems we do create do wreak havoc in our lives and the lives of those close to us. So, how do we allow the virtue of self-control to grow within us?
Let’s begin with the biblical understanding of what Paul was speaking of when he penned this letter.
The term Paul was ekrateia (eng-krat’-I-ah), which is translated self-control or temperance. The term means to be strong in a thing (masterful) (Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible). We would agree that people who have self-control are strong individuals.
There are two aspects to self-control.
1. Self-control requires great strength because the hardest person to say “no” to is your self.
M. Scott Peck writes in his book "The Road Less Traveled: "I spent much of my ninth summer on a bicycle. About a mile from our house the road went down a steep hill and turned sharply at the bottom. Coasting down the hill one morning, I felt my gathering speed to be ecstatic. To give up this ecstasy by applying brakes seemed an absurd self-punishment. So I resolved to simultaneously retain my speed and negotiate the corner. My ecstasy ended seconds later when I was propelled a dozen feet off the road into the woods. I was badly scratched and bleeding, and the front wheel of my new bike was twisted beyond use from its impact against a tree. I had been unwilling to suffer the pain of giving up my ecstatic speed in the interest of maintaining my balance around the corner. I learned, however, that the loss of balance is ultimately more painful than the giving up required to maintain balance.”
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We do not want to hinder our enjoyment of life. We do not want to reduce the pleasure we have in life. So, rather than tell ourselves to slow down, we head into life’s curves traveling too fast only to find ourselves scratched, bruised, and bleeding.
2. Self-control requires great strength because self-control also means doing what must be done.
Most people blame procrastination for why they put off doing the things that must be done. In reality, few people are procrastinators. The reasons we put things off is a problem of self-control. We put off taking action because we fear the results. We put off saying what needs to be said because we fear rejection and conflict. We put off making a decision because we have a compulsion toward perfectionism and fear failure. So, instead of exercising self-control, we give into fear. Instead of exercising self-control, we put off the inevitable. Self-control requires great strength because exercising self-control involves taking risks.
“The role of the coach is to make men do things they don’t want to do to achieve the results they want to achieve.”
Coach Tom Landry
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A biblical example of a person who exercised self-control is the Apostle Paul. In his first letter to the Corinthians, Paul tells us what he learned about living a life of self-control. Listen to what he wrote.
1 Corinthians 9:24-27 (NLT)
24Remember that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize. You also must run in such a way that you will win. 25All athletes practice strict self-control. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. 26So I run straight to the goal with purpose in every step. I am not like a boxer who misses his punches. 27I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.
Paul teaches us there are five qualities of the self-controlled life.
1. A self-controlled life has positive goals. (9:24)
Remember that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize. You also must run in such a way that you will win.
The goal for the athlete is to win the prize. The prize is the motivation the athlete needs to undergo the training and discipline.
The reason most of us do not exercise self-control is because we do not have a goal. There is no motivation to discipline ourselves. If we do have goals, they tend to be either too vague or so unrealistic that we know within ourselves that we can never achieve them.
· We know we want to have plenty of money to enjoy life, contribute to our church and other charitable organizations. But our financial goals are too vague or too unrealistic. We have no plan to help us reach our financial goals.
· We want to be healthy, but have no specific goals regarding our healthy. So, we fail to discipline ourselves.
· We want our marriage to grow from good to great, but have no specific goals to help us define what a great marriage is.
· We want to have a successful business, but without specific goals, it will never happen.
· We want to be Spirit led Christians, but without specific spiritual goals, it will never happen.
Goals are merely pie-in-the-sky dreams if we never exercise self-discipline to make them become a reality. For the athlete to win the prize, there will be times when he will have to say “no” to himself and other times when he will have to do what he doesn’t want to do.
What are your goals for your spiritual life, your marriage, your business, and your finances? Take the time to write them our. If you know where you’re heading, it’ll be easier to exercise self-control.
2. A self-controlled life involves discipline. (9:25)
All athletes practice strict self-control.
Once the athlete knows the prize he longs to win, he begins training and preparing himself for the day of competition.
Discipline means to train. Athletes train their bodies to compete. Persons who enter spelling b competitions train their minds to know the phonics rules and to memorize words. Discipline does not mean punishment, although discipline may incorporate punishment in the plan.
Everyone has financial goals. In order to reach those goals, we begin a plan of discipline. That discipline will include increasing our knowledge of money and how money works. The plan of discipline will also include making connections with people who can help us. These people may be financial planners, people we respect, and others who can give us wise advice. Our plan of discipline will also include decisions that require self-control. Every choice we make to spend or not to spend money determines how quickly we reach our financial goals.
So you see, discipline involves learning, networking, and self-control. The same is true with you spiritual goals, your marriage goals, and your business goals.
Do you have a plan of discipline to reach your goals? A self-controlled life involves discipline.
3. A self-controlled life demands focus. (9:25b-26)
25bThey do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. 26So I run straight to the goal with purpose in every step. I am not like a boxer who misses his punches.
Just as the athlete keeps focused on the prize for winning the competition, Paul kept focused on his heavenly goal of eternal life.
The advantage to having goals and living a life of self-control is that it becomes easy to make decisions. An athlete has little trouble saying “no” to things that will not help him move closer to his goal. So called opportunities come along all the time. Many of them are good. But few opportunities help us to move toward the fulfillment of our goals. Staying focused on the goal makes self-control easier.
The reason we have little self-control when it comes to eating is that we lose sight of the goal, which is to be healthy. Instead we focus on our gratification for the moment.
Remaining focused on a future goal requires a lot of self-control. It is very easy to get sidetracked.
Are you focused on your goals? Are you easily distracted? A self-controlled life demands focus.
4. A self-controlled life includes the whole person: mind, body, and emotions. (9:27)
I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should.
Self-control begins in the mind. Throughout our lives, the teachings of those we admire and life experiences create what we call mindsets. We determine in our minds to behave a certain way. We determine in our minds that something is true or false based upon a life experience. Our mindset determines our actions and our feelings.
There are days when the athlete’s body is tired and sore, but he continues training. There are days when he doesn’t feel like training, but he does so anyway. There are days when he begins to doubt his ability to outperform the other competitors, but he keeps on training.
In his letter to the Romans, Paul gave us this insight.
Romans 12:1-2 (NKJV)
1I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. 2And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
Victor Frankl, the Jewish psychologist who spent time in a Nazi concentration camp in Germany wrote, "They striped me naked. They took everything -- my wedding ring, watch. I stood there naked and all of a sudden realized at that moment that although they could take everything away from me -- my wife, my family, my possessions -- they could not take away my freedom to choose how I was going to respond."
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In the horrible conditions of a concentration camp with no hope for the future, Victor Frankl exercised self-controlled. He controlled his thinking, his body, and his emotions.
Are you training your whole body? Have you presented your bodies to the Lord as a living sacrifices? Is your mind being renewed daily? Most of our mindsets need to be transformed.
5. A self-controlled life means total submission to the coach and the coach’s training plan. (Galatians 5:22a)
But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us…
Every athlete who excels does so because he has completely submitted himself to a coach and the coach’s training plan.
The only way you and I can live a life of self-control is to totally surrender ourselves to the Holy Spirit and his control.
Let’s go back to the definition of self-control. Self-control is control of the self. We cannot control our “selves”. The Holy Spirit is our coach. He teaches, trains, corrects, and encourages us. When we yield to his coaching, we can live a life of self-control.
Invitation
These nine virtues are not the results of our work. They are the result of the Holy Spirit working in and through us.
Who is controlling your “self”? Self-control is not when I control my “self”. Self-control is when the Holy Spirit controls my “self”.
