¡§Jesus & Frank Sinatra¡¨
I Corinthians 13:5
February 2, 2003
Love of Another Kind ¡V I Corinthians 13
¡§¡¦Jesus¡¦ Way¡¦
or
¡¥My Way¡¦?¡¨
And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, I’ll say it clear,
I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain.
I’ve lived a life that’s full.
I’ve traveled each and ev’ry highway;
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
Can we call this the ¡§anthem of the ¡¥Me Generation¡¦¡¨? Proudly thumping our chests and holding our heads high, we revel in the wonder of¡Kourselves! Of the ¡§Me Generation¡¨, John Armstrong wrote, ¡§What is most remarkable about the American experiment in Me-ism is that we are the only society ever that has been able to invest vast material resources, and at all levels, in Me.¡¨ And it all seems so¡KAmerican!
We¡¦ve been looking at what love looks like as we practice it as believers toward one another. Stand with me as we read together this morning from I Corinthians 13:1-5! Eugene Peterson, in The Message, says that love ¡§isn¡¦t always ¡¥me first¡¦¡¨. Would you pray with me?
Root of fallen sinful nature is the desire to have one¡¦s own way. This is how we prove we naturally love ourselves, because in 1001 ways we prove each day that we want what we want (not that this is our only motive, but we function this way!).
And our American society pretty much inculcates this thinking in us.
Government acts as Momma instead of in its rightful role; we think we are entitled to all sorts of goodies. We¡¦ve got a Bill of Rights, and we¡¦re entitled to ¡§life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.¡¨ And my, do we insist on the ¡§pursue happiness¡¨ prerogative!
Burger King says ¡§have it your way¡¨, and the U.S. Army says you can be ¡§an army of one¡¨. I¡¦m sorry, I don¡¦t want to be an army of one!
How many websites offer customization; ¡§MY _________¡¨.
Designer religion is all the rage. Like her television show, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, actress Sarah Michelle Gellar’s personal spirituality borrows from a hodgepodge of religions. "I consider myself a spiritual person," she told Scotland’s Daily Record. "I believe in an idea of God, although it’s my own personal ideal. I find most religions interesting, and I’ve been to every kind of denomination: Catholic, Christian, Jewish, Buddhist. I’ve taken bits from everything and customized it."
I did a Google search for ¡§rights¡¨, and it produced, just in the first 40 headers, references to:
Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual/Transgender Rights
Children¡¦s Rights
Privacy Rights
Animal Rights
Disability Rights
Civil Rights
Native American Rights
Cyber-Rights
Abortion Rights
Medicare Rights
Minority Rights
Labor Rights
Women¡¦s Rights
Non-Smoker¡¦s Rights
If we Americans are one thing, it is concerned with our rights, is it not? Don¡¦t get me wrong; I appreciate the fact that our nation, unique among nations, has a ¡§Bill of Rights¡¨, and some of the rights mentioned above¡Xsome, I¡¦d suggest, but not all¡Xneed to be defended. But we certainly are eager to stand up for ourselves, aren¡¦t we?
The Corinthians, of course, were textbook cases for how not to be loving; at every turn, it seems, they looked out for their own best interests. They were rude to one another during the Lord¡¦s Table celebration. They were taking each other to court before unbelievers. They were competing with one another to demonstrate the most flashy of spiritual gifts. They were lining up behind various teachers and arguing for the superiority of their particular favorites. They were taking freedom in Christ to the point of license. Paul in chapter 10 has talked about the freedom in which the Corinthians ought to walk.
Now, some of my own background has been in churches that were afraid of true Christian freedom. There are some Christians who seem to think that it is their place in life to make all other Christians agree with them on everything. There have been some in churches past who would look down on me because every element of my lifestyle didn¡¦t conform to theirs. Paul strongly urges upon the Corinthians freedom in the Spirit as opposed to a legalistic orientation whereby rules govern life. At the same time, he comes back to balance that here, by talking about the fact that the issue isn¡¦t just doing what one good and well pleases, but that we have to consider others¡Xa point he has made already in 10:24 and 10:33.
All through Scripture, in fact, we come to understand that people are driven, innately, by a desire to put themselves first. All through Scripture, we see The FACE of Power and Pride:
It¡¦s Adam and Eve, who wanted their way; so it is with every sin. All sin involves choosing our own way, either in our deliberately choosing to sin or in being unwilling to do what God says. Those without knowledge of God still naturally follow selfish impulses, though they may not understand how doing so grieves a holy God. ¡§You shall be like God¡¨ was the lie told by the serpent, and it struck a note with Eve.
It¡¦s King Saul, chasing David across the countryside, intent on murder. King Saul was the king¡Xand had the power. But it wasn¡¦t enough; he wanted to control the sentiments and hearts of others, and the thought of David was enough to send him into an insane rage.
It¡¦s Samson, boasting that ¡§with the jawbone of a donkey, I have killed 1000 men¡¨¡Xand then being unable to curb his own lusts.
It¡¦s the disciples, tussling with one another over and over again, wrestling about the question of greatness in the kingdom, jockeying for position and seeking the prominence. It¡¦s the mother of two of them, James and John, asking Jesus to put her boys on special display.
Love isn¡¦t about power; it¡¦s about giving. Jesus¡¦ disciples were into power; Jesus was into self-giving. Love isn¡¦t looking out for what it can get, but rather what it can give. If this is the case, how then do we conquer a ¡§My Way¡¨ lifestyle?
Conquering a ¡§My Way¡¨ Lifestyle
I. Reject the Lies
We as Christians need to look our society in the face and call its bluff; real life doesn¡¦t consist of getting more for ourselves (Jesus said, ¡§A man¡¦s life does not consist of the abundance of the things he possesses.¡¨). Real life doesn¡¦t consist of getting power (Jesus said, ¡§Whoever would be great among you must be like a little child. Whoever seeks to save his life will lose it, and whoever will lose his life for my sake will find it.¡¨). Real life doesn¡¦t consist of pleasure-seeking (Jesus told the story of the man who went full-speed-ahead after eating, drinking, and being merry, taking no thought for his soul; Jesus¡¦ verdict was ¡§fool!¡¨).
Gordon Fee ¡V Christian love ¡§does not believe that ¡¥finding oneself¡¦ is the highest good; it is not enamored with self-gain, self-justification, self-worth. To the contrary, it seeks the good of one¡¦s neighbor¡Xor enemy.¡¨
Did you watch the Super Bowl? I did, the whole thing, not because it was a great game (although by definition, the Raiders losing is always a great thing); I watched all of it because of, yes, the commercials! My new hero? Terry Tate, Office Linebacker! At any rate, did you catch the promo for the new Jim Carrey movie? ¡§Bruce Almighty¡¨; the premise is ¡§what if you could be God for a week?¡¨ I¡¦m pretty sure that that film is going to contain some pretty godless fare, but the truth is that I wonder how many people would dream of having the power to be God¡Xin order that they might heap pleasure upon themselves!
To a world which suggests that ¡§self-fulfillment¡¨ and ¡§self-expression¡¨ and ¡§self-you-name-it¡¨ is at the top of the stack of priorities (and by the way: some people go to church more for self-fulfillment than to worship God!), the Christian says, ¡§no! We call your bluff! It¡¦s about a whole lot more than me!¡¨ Love does not seek its own.
II. Confess Your Sin
You seek your own. I naturally seek my own. This is part of the way sin warps me. It is what I do, and if I am always concerned with what others do (¡§I know somebody who¡¦s really into power!!!¡¨) and miss the fact that this is my orientation as well, then I miss the point. Self-justification is the opposite of humble understanding. It¡¦s me, it¡¦s me, o Lord, standing in the need of repentance.
Richard Foster wrote, ¡§The idolatry of today is the idolatry of power.¡¨ And this idolatry is not the domain of those who control wealth, or status, or leadership; the lust for power is seen in the lives of people from all across the spectrum.
„h It is seen in the life of the one who insists upon the right to live his own life his own way (¡§I don¡¦t care what you say anymore, this is my life; go ahead with your own life¡Xleave me alone!¡¨). ¡§It¡¦s my life¡¨ is the unquestioned mantra of 21st-century men and women; never mind that John Donne reminds us that ¡§No man is an island, entire unto himself¡¨.
„h It is seen in the life of the one who refuses accountability for his actions, whether that person is a United States Senator or a factory worker.
We cannot take a pass on this issue simply because we can think of others who have more power than we do. We too can be guilty of the sin of ¡§seeking our own¡¨ whenever we seek to have our own way, irrespective of the needs of others. Love does not seek its own.
III. Renounce Your Rights
Paul comes to a Corinthian church wherein people were taking one another to court when they felt slighted, and he asks the penetrating question, ¡§why not rather be wronged?¡¨ How unAmerican! We wouldn¡¦t need lawyers anymore! ¡§Christ is All I Need¡¨ was the old hymn; ¡§You are my All in All¡¨ is the new chorus. ¡§Take my Life and Let it Be Consecrated, Lord, to Thee¡¨ is the hymn, with progressive choruses of surrender; ¡§I Have Decided to Follow Jesus¡¨ includes the phrase, ¡§Take the whole world; just give me Jesus.¡¨ Are we in the position where we can honestly say we have nothing to lose? As Foster says, ¡§You cannot take something from someone who has nothing.¡¨
I don¡¦t have to be right, or pampered, or vindicated. I don¡¦t have to have my own way. I don¡¦t have to have the last word. I don¡¦t have to always be understood, or to make sure I get my point across. I don¡¦t have to always be satisfied with the choices others make, or argue every minor point so as to persuade others to always agree with me. I don¡¦t have to be successful, or in the majority, or on the winning team. Love does not seek its own.
IV. Get in Formation
Recognize the intrinsically communal nature of Christian living. A church is designed to be far more than a collection of individuals pursuing their own private relationships with God. We probably have much to learn in this regard from past generations. The monastics, in order to deal with the innate lust for power, would take vows of obedience, wherein they would place themselves in submission to spiritual leaders, vowing to do as they were told. That¡¦s a reprehensible concept in our society today, the idea that we would place ourselves willingly under the authority of another. And yet, the individualistic approach of many to Christianity is foreign to church history, and more importantly, foreign to the Bible. Authentic Christianity is to be lived out in the context of a community of care, instruction, and accountability. Whenever you hear anyone say, ¡§I can be a Christian without being involved in a church¡¨, the proper, Bible response is, ¡§sorry, you can¡¦t be a very good one!¡¨
Richard Foster tells the story of how, on one occasion, Francis of Assisi went to Sister Clare and Brother Masseo to ask them to seek the mind of the Lord regarding his ministry. Upon their return, Francis knelt and asked, ¡§what does my Lord Jesus Christ order me to do?¡¨ His request was not for their opinion, nor even for their counsel, but for his marching orders! He let go of his own way and, in the context of the community, sought God¡¦s will. Young people, open to future ministry, place yourself squarely in the context of a church community which can guide you, care for you, and hold you accountable.
V. Grab a Towel
This was Jesus¡¦ response, to wash the feet of sinful disciples who wouldn¡¦t themselves condescend to this menial task. My orientation toward others is ¡§how may I serve you?¡¨, but this is not the same as the waitress, who might ask that question but know that, the better she does, the bigger the tip will be. No, it is the orientation of one who gives in secret, expecting nothing in return.
Richard Foster again writes, ¡§Power¡¦s ability to destroy relationships is written across the face of humanity.¡¨ The basic orientation we have toward others is to try to exert power over them, but there is no way that healthy relationships can flower in the context of power struggles.
Sometimes we are called to choose between the benefit of others and the benefit of ourselves. Love chooses the benefit of others. This doesn¡¦t mean we are not attentive to the legitimate needs we have; Jesus withdrew to be by Himself with His Father on numerous occasions, and He needed rest and refreshment as well. As with so many other areas, balance is called for here. My basic disposition is to love and care for others; in order to do this most effectively, I must sometimes attend to the needs I have as well. But serving others is our calling. In Matthew 20:28, Jesus said that His mission in life was not to be served, but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many. Our mission, if we would be Christ¡¦s, is to serve as well. Love does not seek its own.
John MacArthur tells of a tombstone in England, the epitaph on which bespoke the sad legacy of a life lived to please self. Its words:
¡§Here lies a miser who lived for himself, and cared for nothing but gathering wealth. Now where he is or how he fares, nobody knows and nobody cares.¡¨
