The Real Small Group Leader
Pastor Jim Luthy
Last week, I mentioned the optimum group size was probably between 2-12 people. That being said, I’m sure any of you who have worked with a group of others would agree there are times when it seems the optimum group size is one. Working with others can often be very taxing.
I worked in an office environment for eight years. I have to admit, in the middle of those eight years, I spent two years running a one-person unit. Those just might have been the best years of my life. I can say that based on some of the experiences I had working with other people.
There was the female supervisor, who finally snapped when I pointed out the fact that she was not being rational about a decision she had made: "I’m having PMS, okay!" The scary thing was that she later received a commission at a local police department and they gave her a gun. The way I figure it, if she mistakes you for a criminal and draws down on you, you have a 1 in 6 chance she’s "having PMS, okay!"
There was also the time when the Office Manager, my supervisor’s boss, called me in to explain why I was telling everyone that women who don’t have babies are sinners. Whoever made that one up was especially creative, considering that the office manager and two of the three supervisors were women who never had children.
Then there was the time when I was given a written reprimand for "failing to use proper chain of communication" when I politely informed one of the clerical staff, as I was walking by her desk, that we had finished quite a number of documents to be processed and the "out" box was quite full. I was instructed that the proper way to handle such a situation would be to tell my supervisor, who would then tell a manager, who would then inform the clerical supervisor, who would then assign the necessary task to the person I approached in the first place. After all, who needs efficiency in government work?
Workplace relationships can be quite complex. In fact, any time you bring a group of people together—whether it be a work group, a family, a sports team, a civic committee, or even a small group in church—you create a complex system of relationships that are difficult to maintain, let alone turn them into productivity. Furthermore, the more people you bring into the group, the complexity of that group increases dramatically. If there are two people in a group, there is only one line of communication—A to B. If there are three people in a group, there are three lines of communication—A to B, A to C, and B to C. If you add a fourth person, there are 6 lines of communication—A to B, A to C, A to D, B to C, B to D, and C to D. So the complexity of the relationships within a group increases as the group grows in size.
It’s my intent to finish our series on "Living in Community" with two messages about relationships in the small group. Next week, I would like to talk with you about what I intended to talk with you about tonight—the relationships we have with one another in the context of a small group. But God surprised me this week, as he often does, and gave me an unexpected word to share about leadership of the group.
The wisdom of generations of group dynamics has brought us to see the value of leadership within a group system. The leader at the center of a group both collects and disseminates much of the information required for the group to function. As the need for members within the group to communicate is minimized, the group becomes more efficient. Of course, even with leadership in place, members of a group still must communicate with one another at some level, which is what we’ll talk about next week. If group members do not interact, information can be logjammed at the leader. When that happens, learning and growth and efficiency are stunted. Obviously, there is a delicate balance for efficiency and for healthy group relationships.
This is how most groups in our culture operate. In a work group, the role of leader is assumed by the boss, manager, or supervisor of the work group. In a family, Biblical or not, this role is most often assumed by the dominant parent. On a baseball team, the coach fills this role. In a civic committee, it would be the chairperson.
Is this model familiar to you? Do you recognize this in the different groups you are a part of?
Because this model is so familiar, it is likely how we view our TLC Groups. We have TLC Groups that meet in homes, and each of those groups has a leader. So when we gather, we tend to view the leader as the relational hub within that group. For example, in my group, everyone has a connection with me. I communicate in some way with everyone in that group outside of the gathering just about every week. While everyone in the group might draw some sense of connection with Tammie and me, they would probably not make the same assertion about their relationship with others in the group. We are the relational hub, and we’re happy to be so. But if any of us are to be great leaders, we must move beyond the group experience we are all familiar with.
Consider the ministry of John the Baptist in Luke 3. Luke’s narrative to this point has been about the birth and early childhood of Jesus. The last thing Luke has told us about Jesus was that he "grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men." (Luke 2:52)
In the fifteenth year of the reign of Tiberius Caesar…during the high priesthood of Annas and Caiaphas, the word of God came to John son of Zechariah in the desert. He went into all the country around the Jordan, preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. As it is written in the book of the words of Isaiah the prophet:
A voice of one calling in the desert,
"Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him.
Every valley shall be filled in, every mountain and hill made low
The crooked roads shall become straight, the rough ways smooth.
And all mankind will see God’s salvation." – Luke 3:1-6
Leadership is influence, and John influenced a lot of people with his message in the desert. Matthew’s account of John’s ministry declares, "People went out to him from Jerusalem and all Judea and the whole region of the Jordan. Confessing their sins, they were baptized by him in the Jordan River." (Matthew 3:5-6)
With great leadership, John taught the people who flocked to the desert to hear him to prepare the way for the Lord and make straight paths for him. He told the religious leaders to bear fruit in keeping with repentance. He told the crowd to share their clothing and their food for those who had none. He told the tax collectors to be honest in their dealings. He told the soldiers not to extort money or accuse people falsely. In summary, his message was, "Repent and change your ways."
The people were waiting expectantly and were all wondering in their hearts if John might possibly be the Christ. John answered them all, "I baptize you with water. But one more powerful than I will come, the thongs of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire. His winnowing fork is in his hand to clear his threshing floor and to gather the wheat into his barn, but he will burn up the chaff with unquenchable fire." And with many other words John exhorted the people and preached the good news to them. (Luke 3:15-18)
Turn with me now to the other John’s account of what happened next:
The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, "Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world! This is the one I meant when I said, ‘A man who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’ I myself did not know him, but the reason I came baptizing with water was that he might be revealed to Israel." Then John gave this testimony: "I saw the Spirit come down from heaven as a dove and remain on him. I would not have known him, except that the one who sent me to baptize with water told me, ‘The man on whom you see the Spirit come down and remain is he who will baptize with the Holy Spirit.’ I have seen and I testify that this is the Son of God." (John 1:29-34)
Jesus’ ministry began after John baptized him. After a while, Jesus was out in the Judean countryside with his disciples baptizing people in the same place as John the Baptist. Some of the people familiar with John’s ministry were really troubled by Jesus’ presence.
They came to John and said to him, ‘Rabbi, that man who was with you on the other side of the Jordan—the one you testified about—well, he is baptizing, and everyone is going to him."
To this John replied, "A man can receive only what is given him from heaven. You yourselves can testify that I said, ‘I am not the Christ but am sent ahead of him.’ The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. He must become greater; I must become less." (John 3:26-30)
With that, John’s ministry began to fade, and eventually he was beheaded. John prepared the way for Jesus, and then Jesus gathered the group of 12 men around him that had the greatest, most lasting impact on the world than any small group in the history of man. In many ways, this group looked much like the model we are all familiar with. Jesus was the center of the group. Throughout the gospels we are treated to a number of lessons and dialogues between Jesus and the twelve that showed he was the relational hub of this group. He was the teacher. He was the leader. He was the bond between them all.
Of course, in most ways, this is also what John’s ministry looked like and what our TLC Groups look like as well. It would be easy for us to pat ourselves on the back and say, "Well, looky there! We’re doin’ ministry just like John the Baptist and Jesus did ministry." But may I point out one very simple yet critical fact: The model small group was not the one John led, it was the one Jesus led. There was a difference between the two. We learn that from John’s confession: "He must become greater, I must become less."
As your pastor, it is not my intention to be the one who is relationally connected with Jesus who comes to the pulpit each weekend to tell you what God is making known to me. As a small group leader, it is not my intention to bring those in my group to a place where their spiritual life is lived vicariously through my relationship with Christ. First of all, I am far too imperfect to be anyone’s model. Second, and most important, that’s not at all what Jesus meant for you when he offered his life on a cross to restore you to the Father.
Make no mistake, Jesus is alive and he wants to have a personal, loving, living, and leading relationship with each and every one of us. He also longs to be present as the center of our gatherings, just as he promised, to be light and to give life. He wants to baptize us in the Holy Spirit and fire, so we can have a spirit of wisdom and revelation, living on a completely different level than we’ve ever lived before. When we gather, he wants to pour out spiritual gifts so we may edify one another, building one another up and making us holy. He wants to give us prophetic words about who he is, what he is doing, and what he is going to do next in our very lives. He wants us to share those words in our gathering. He wants to give us power to be his witnesses in this city and around the world. He wants us to live in intimacy with him. But he cannot give us these precious gifts until we look beyond the familiar model where some man or woman is at the center and we come together with an expectation that Jesus is the center of the group.
For it is at the center of our being that Jesus belongs. After all, we were bought with a price—the price of his own blood. Through him we have been bought back from slavery to our old ways and we have forgiveness for our sins. Now he also gives us the Spirit of sonship that causes us to cry out: "Abba!" "Father!" "Lord."
Leadership is critical in the church. We need leaders who will prepare the way for the Lord. We need leaders who will counsel us to repent and change our ways. We need leaders who will help us identify Christ when he comes in our midst. Ultimately, though, we need leaders who will say, "He must become greater, I must become less."
My prayer for you, just Paul prayed for the Ephesians, is this:
I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. (Ephesians 3:16-19)
Can anything in life be greater than this? Christ dwelling in your hearts, as together with those in your TLC Group you are able to grasp the love of Christ and be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
