Holy Habits: Love
Introduction
Peter’s list of Christian Graces has challenged us to grow in the qualities that make us more like Christ. Each one sounds simple, but they are not easy. They call on us to never be content with our current status. If we rest, we rust!
We have spoken of these qualities as habits - things we want to engage every day so that they become a natural part of our lives. James Clear helps us understand habits in his book Atomic Habits. “A habit is a behavior that has been repeated enough times to become automatic.” The Christian Graces in 2 Peter 1 can become, when repeated enough times, automatic - the behavior we seek.
2 Peter 1:5-7 NIV “For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7 and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love.”
Which of these habits has been challenging you the most?
Through these instructions, the Lord is always leading us to love.
-Goodness seeks to love others by seeing the best in them.
-Knowledge informs our ability to love others.
-Self-Control leads us away from selfish motives and self-focus.
-Perseverance teaches us to keep on loving in difficult days.
-Godliness reminds us - to be like God is to be a loving person.
-Brotherly kindness puts legs on our love - acting in loving ways in service and encouragement.
It all leads us to love. Robert Harvey wrote, “In each case, we are being called on to express in action the nature God has created in us.” To be in the holy habit of love is ultimately to be in the holy habit of growing into God’s character.
1. The Holy Habit of Love is Seeking the Best for Others.
Agape - capstone of all the virtues the Christian should pursue.
Michael Green: “This agape might be defined as a deliberate desire for the highest good of the one loved, which shows itself in sacrificial action for that person’s good.”
Copeland gives these qualities of Agape Love:
-Unearned. Does not depend on the one being loved as having earned such love. Example: Your children do not have to earn your love - it exists apart from them!
-Open. Not an exclusive love (brothers only), but an all-embracing benevolence. Jesus modeled love for strangers, rejects, outcasts.
-Purposeful. Not an uncontrolled reaction of the heart, but a concentrated exercise of will. It won’t always be easy, but it is our effort to express love for others.
-Compassionate. A caring love, one that becomes involved in the needs of others. The cross is the greatest act of compassion - meeting the greatest need of all.
No wonder agape love is such a powerful force.
2. The Holy Habit of Love is the Oxygen of the Christian Life
-It is the Atmosphere of the Christian life (“walk in love”) Eph 5:2
-It is the garment of the Christian (“put on love”) Col. 4:2
-Motive of Christian service (“done with love”) - 1 Cor 16:14
-It is the glue of Christian unity (“knit together in love”) - Col. 2:2
-Given first place in the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22)
-Love is the crowning virtue - exalted above even faith and hope in 1 Corinthians 13.
3. The Holy Habit of Love is a Daily Practice.
-Spend Time With God Daily.
Agape love flows from God. The more time you spend in prayer, worship, and the Word, the more your heart becomes like His. 1 John 4:7–8 says, "Let us love one another, for love is from God…"
-Serve Others Without Expectation. Look for ways to serve people and do it out of love, not to get anything back. Matthew 5:46-48 – Even sinners love those who love them…
-Practice Forgiveness Often
Agape love forgives quickly. Holding onto bitterness hardens your heart, but forgiving keeps it soft and open. Ephesians 4:32 – “Be kind and compassionate… forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
-Love the "Hard to Love"
Ask God to help you show love to people who frustrate or hurt you. This is where agape love really grows. Think of someone you avoid or dislike—start praying for them daily and look for one kind thing you could do for them this week. Luke 6:35 – “But love your enemies, do good to them…”
Renew Your Mind
Agape love comes from thinking differently—less about self, more about God and others. Romans 12:2 – “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind…”
Cortez: Here we see that love is not just a noun. It is more of a verb. It is not just an emotion. it calls for action.
Conclusion
The Holy Habit of Love - seeking the best for others, is a necessary component of the Christian life, and is a habit to be put into action.
James Clear writes about Hebb’s Law. Donald Hebb was a neuropsychologist who discovered a connection between our habits and our brain. The more you repeat an activity, the more the structure of your brain changes to become efficient at that activity. With each repetition cell-to-cell signaling improves and connections are made. Hebb’s Law: “Neurons that fire together wire together.” Learning a new language, to play an instrument, to any acquired skill - “Each time you repeat an action, you are activating a particular neural circuit associated with that habit. … habits form based on frequency, not time.”
Are you applying diligence to grow in Christ? Do you give it mental effort? Do you make time to grow spiritually? Do you wrestle with where you need to grow?
When we put these Christian graces into practice, we are creating pathways to habits that help us become more like Christ. Which of these holy habits needs your attention today? We can be assured that we have not wandered so far away from God that he will not have us back. Peter had experience with failing and falling in faith, yet coming back to receive the grace and mercy of God. His great love for us is the open door we all need to see. These holy habits are essential and powerful.
2 Peter 1:10-11 “Therefore, my brothers and sisters, make every effort to confirm your calling and election. For if you do these things, you will never stumble, and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”
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Discussion Questions
1. How is agape love different from other kinds of love we experience (friendship, romance, family)?
2. Why do you think agape love must be a choice rather than just a feeling?
3. Which of the Copeland qualities of agape (unearned, open, purposeful, compassionate) do you find most challenging—and why?
4. How does understanding God’s love for us help us love others more deeply?
5. According to Scripture, what happens to our good deeds if we lack love? (cf. 1 Corinthians 13:1–3)**
6. What are some ways we can serve others without expecting anything in return? Why is that so difficult at times?
7. What’s one way forgiveness demonstrates agape love? What helps you overcome the difficulty of forgiving?
8. Romans 12:2 talks about renewing our minds. How does that relate to growing in agape love? What thoughts need to be “renewed”?**
9. What does Hebb’s Law (“neurons that fire together wire together”) teach us about forming spiritual habits like love?
10. How can we be more intentional in building daily habits that lead us to love like Jesus?
11. Peter failed in love (denying Christ), yet was restored and became a leader. What does that teach us about second chances in our own spiritual growth?
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Resources for this Series Include...
Austin, Daniel. Be Certain, Sermon Series.
https://sermoncentral.com/sermon-series/be-certain-sermon-series-from-daniel-austin-5895
Barclay, William. The Daily Study Bible: The Letters of James and Peter. Westminster Press, 1960.
Clear, James. Atomic Habits. Avery Press, 2018.
Cole, Steven J. Growing in Godliness
http://bible.org/seriespage/lesson-3-growing-godliness-2-peter-15-7
Copeland, Mark. Growing in the Knowledge of Jesus Christ Sermons
https://executableoutlines.com/topical_series/growing-knowledge-jesus-christ/
Cortez, Enrich. Our Pursuit for Growth Sermon series.
https://sermoncentral.com/sermon-series/our-pursuit-for-our-growth-sermon-series-from-eyriche-cortez-999
Criswell, W. A. The Seven Christian Graces
https://wacriswell.com/sermons/1974/the-seven-christian-graces/
Deffinbaugh, Bob. The Pursuit of Christian Character
https://bible.org/seriespage/pursuit-christian-character-2-peter-15-7
Fox, Michael. Complete in Christ. Xulon Press, 2007.
Harmon, Matthew S. ESV Expository Commentary, Volume XII Hebrews - Revelation. Crossway, 2018.
Harvey, Robert and Philip H. Towner. The IVP New Testament Commentary Series: 2 Peter and Jude. InterVarsity Press, 2009.
Helm, David R. Preaching the Word Series: 1 & 2 Peter and Jude. Crossway, 2008.
Mathis, David. Habits of Grace: Enjoying Jesus through the Spiritual Disciplines. Crossway, 2016.
Shelly, Rubel. Something to Hold On To: Studies in First and Second Peter. 21st Century Christian, 1985.
Warden, Duane. 1 & 2 Peter and Jude. Truth for Today Commentary Series, Resource Publications, 2009.
