“What Wells are You Drinking From?”
John 4:4-18, 25-30, 39-42
She has a history.
Things done and some left undone, some good some not so good.
Guilts and regrets.
Fears.
Wounds and sorrows.
And secrets too.
Most commentaries and interpretations down through the ages take it for granted that this woman was promiscuous.
They take it for granted that she is shunned by her community due to her lifestyle and maybe that’s true and maybe that’s not true.
We don’t know.
What we do know is that women of her day had very little choice or control over their lives.
If she is divorced it is because the men divorced her.
She couldn’t divorce someone; that’s only something the man can do—she didn’t have the right.
And maybe she isn’t divorced at all.
Maybe she’s lived through the deaths of five husbands.
That’s five times of being left alone—five times of starting over.
Or, maybe some of the husbands divorced her and some died.
We really don’t know.
And the man she is living with now could be her uncle, her father…we are not told.
Either way, she has lived through tragedy.
Life has not been easy for her.
And I think we can all relate to that.
(pause)
Ten years-ago or so, a woman came to my office to talk, but by the time she sat down, she was in tears.
When she was finally able to speak a few words, this is what she said: “Nobody knows me. Nobody understands me.”
She talked for a long time that day.
For years she had been a drug addict and had turned to prostitution to make a living.
But she had overcome her drug habit and now had, what we might call, “a respectable job,” and lived in a “respectable neighborhood” with a “respectable husband.”
But, she was really, really ashamed of her past, and she had not told anyone about it—not even her husband.
She was afraid she would be rejected.
And you know, people like her aren’t unusual.
The situations might not be as extreme, but—in a very real way--the Woman at the Well is the story of most of us.
Most all of us have things we have done that we are ashamed of.
Most all of us have secrets we wouldn’t share with a soul.
Male or female, rich or poor, popular or unpopular—this situation affects us all.
People like her, people like us, people with a past, often live in fear of being found out.
It’s not just the fear that someone will know the truth, the facts about us, but that they will do so without ever really seeing us for who we are—without really knowing us, understanding our situation.
And so, we thirst to be seen and known at a deep intimate level—but it scares us at the same time because we don’t want to be judged—we want to be embraced, loved, and accepted.
We want to pour our lives out to someone who knows us, accepts and loves us unconditionally, to let them drink from the depths of our very being and offer us grace, mercy, forgiveness, salvation.
And I think that is what Jesus is offerning this woman when he says: “Will you give me a drink?”
It’s Jesus’ invitation to let herself be known.
And to be known and loved is freedom, is it not?
One awesome thing about family, if you come from a good, healthy and loving family is that they are always on your side—even if the rest of the world doesn’t seem to be.
When I was in the 6th Grade we moved to a brand-new city in a brand-new state.
And it was a very difficult transition for me.
One reason was because it was 6th grade.
Kids are often so insecure at that age.
And for the first month or so, not one other child in my class even acknowledged my existence.
It was miserable and dealt a major blow to my self-esteem.
Anyhow, in gym class one day we had a race, and I won.
Later that evening, I was telling my parents and my two sisters this news, and they all made a big deal about it.
They cheered.
They congratulated me.
And I don’t know why I remember such a mundane thing such as that, but I suppose it is because I was being shown love by people who were “rooting for me” and on “my side” at a time when it seemed like the rest of the world was against me.
To be known and to be loved is freedom.
“Please give me a drink,” Jesus asked, “Please let yourself be known. I’m on your side.”
To be found out, however, without being loved—to be known in a bad way-- negatively leaves us dry, desolate and injured.
It leaves us thirsting for something different, but always returning to the same old wells where the water is stagnant and our thirst is not quenched.
We all head to some well or another in search of drink, refreshment for our souls, love, hope, acceptance, meaning.
For some, perhaps like the Samaritan woman, it is the Marriage Well.
For others it might be the well of Perfectionism.
Others will drink from the well of power and control.
Many drink from the wells of addiction, and a lot of us might live at the well of busyness and denial.
Which well do you drink from day after day, month after month, year after year?
We go hoping our thirst will be quenched, but we leave just as thirsty as when we got there…only to return the next day.
For too long, too many folks, have drunk from the well that never satisfies, the well that CAN NEVER satisfy.
Husband after husband; this is the well to which the Samaritan woman returned.
There is another well, though.
It is the well of Jesus Christ.
And it is the only well that satisfies our thirsty souls.
In verse 15 the Samaritan Woman says to Jesus, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.”
And in the conversation that follows, Jesus peels back the layers of her life right before her eyes.
He tells her everything she ever did.
He “saw her,” He understood Her and He didn’t judge her—He loved Her despite it all.
And that’s how it works.
“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”
When God looks into our souls, sees our failures, our short comings, our secrets, knows our guilt, our motivations and loves us anyway—is this not the Living Water that saves us, renews us, remakes us—births us?
Family Therapist David Mace once said that strong relationships are not built on common interests or perspectives.
Rather, they are built on self-revelation.
Relationships that last grow when two people are able to reveal themselves to one another.
A few years ago, I met up with an old friend I hadn’t seen in a number of years.
We had a serious conversation about all the stuff that had happened to us during the years in-between, and he told me some things he had gone through that he felt bad about.
I said to him, “You know, I think I understand. I think I get you.”
And he replied, “I think you do. I think you do.”
That is the stuff that makes for lasting relationships.
And that is what happened 2,000 years ago at Jacob’s well.
Jesus knew this woman.
He understood.
He saw deep within her.
He got her.
And He loved her anyway.
Do you know that Jesus “gets you” too and loves you just the same?
He offered the woman living water—He offered her new life.
The woman said, “I know that the Messiah’ (called Christ) ‘is coming…
…Then Jesus declared, ‘I, the one speaking to you—I am he.’”
Then, she left her water jar; she didn’t need that anymore.
She didn’t need to return to the wells that never satisfy.
(Pause)
To be accepted, to be included, to be forgiven, to be seen, known, and loved no matter what we have done, no matter what we think of ourselves, that is what sets us free to live—really live.
And that is what coming into a relationship with Jesus Christ is like.
What wells are you drinking from?
Do you keep returning to the same old wells that leave you empty, thirsting for more?
Are your burdens and your sins too much to bear?
Are they keeping you from really living?
Are you carrying a heavy water jar?
Are you living a thirsty life?
Are you afraid that someone will find out about your past, your failures, your short-comings, and because of this—not love you; not accept you?
Think about this.
Jesus will never reject you no matter what you have done…no matter what!
And He will give you a new life that lasts.
A new joy and peace that lasts.
And a real love that doesn’t cause you to look somewhere else for something better, something more.
Come to the well that is Christ Himself and drink deeply…
…allow Christ to become in you a Spring of Water welling up to eternal life.
Leave your water jar behind.
You won’t need it anymore.
Allow yourself to never thirst again.
Amen.
