We read in Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (ESV)
The word of God teaches us to set our minds on things that are beneficial to us, for we realize that our thoughts lead to decisions which result in actions. Hence, if we desire that our actions are appropriate, it is essential that our thoughts are also aligned in the proper way. The first aspect that we have been meditating in this series, is to think about those things that are true.
We live in a day and age where the values that we held on to in years gone by, have now become questionable. Also there is much confusion about what is true, and what is not. The world is pushing us to a place where many things that God calls evil, are now being attested as good and acceptable. Therefore, it is only the unchanging word of God that can help us stand firm, and be established on what is really true and good.
The power invested in Adam
The one unit that has come under much attack, which is also deteriorating more than ever before, is the family. It is God Himself who ordained, and established the family. When God created all the animals, birds and creatures of the sea, He created them all as male and female. However, in the creation of human beings, God first created Adam, and assigned a work for him.
We read in Genesis 2:19, “Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature that was its name.” (ESV)
The work that God assigned to Adam was to name every beast of the field, and all the birds of the heavens, and interestingly the name that Adam gave was what each of them went by. In the process, Adam I think was able to understand the difference between himself, and all other created beings. He must have also realized that he was far superior to all of God’s creation. This special responsibility to name other creatures was unique only to man, no other created being has or ever will be able to name another creature as Adam did.
By naming these creatures, Adam also must have understood the authority that God had entrusted to him. Have you noticed how we have the power to name someone or something only when we have authority over them? As the beasts and birds came to him, Adam must have also comprehended the truth that irrespective of how huge these creatures were, they were all subject to his rule and authority.
Further to this we realize that God who created everything, could have easily named all of His creation to. Nonetheless, God entrusted this to Adam to help him understand the creative skill and ability that God had kindly bestowed on him. It is only human beings who are the crown of God’s creation, as they alone are made in the image and likeness of God. The way God entrusted to Adam, and taught Him things, helps us appreciate how much of love and confidence God has placed on us as human beings.
No one to complement Adam
We read in Genesis 2:20, “The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him.” (ESV)
The important part of this naming ceremony was Adam’s awareness that none of these creatures whom he had named none of them would be a suitable companion to him. In the process Adam was also able to realize that he did need a person who would be a suitable companion to him.
These days we hear many parents complain that their son is quite irresponsible, and without discipline. They therefore assume that if they got him married, he would settle down and become a responsible young man. This is a wrong presumption, because marriage should be considered only when a young man and woman understand the need for such a relationship. It is only when there is this maturity in each of them as individuals will that the marriage work out to be a joyful union. Marriage is not a juvenile delinquent plan, to get someone who is off track back on track. When marriages are done this way, it ends up with numerous problems, and heaps miseries on both spouses, and their children as well.
Marriage is a big step, and marriage will bring many changes for both spouses, and this is a certainty. Many people enter marriage just out of compulsion, with no prior preparation or expectations, and once they are married they revert back to their previous way of life before they got married. They end up spending lots of time outside their home with their friends, and spend minimal time with their wife. The outcome of such a relationship is trouble for sure. It is only when a man understands that God has created him, he needs a suitable helper, recognizes his wife as that person, and chooses to live in harmony with her, will that marriage be blessed.
Marriage should be entered into with the understanding that this suitable helper God has given will enable one to be a better person, give them a blessed life, and one that will fulfill God’s will for their lives, for only then their family will be a happy one. If this is not the case the family life will become a huge burden. It is therefore vital that we understand what marriage truly is, and set right all those things that are not in order.
The way God made the suitable helper
We read in Genesis 2:21, “Then the LORD God made the man fall into a deep sleep, and while he was sleeping, he took out one of the man's ribs and closed up the flesh.” (GNB)
While Adam was fast asleep and resting, God created for Adam his suitable companion. If God tried to create Adam when he was awake, he might have given several instructions to God as to the kind of helper that would be suitable for him. God knew how to make the suitable person at the appropriate time for Adam. All that Adam had to do was rest totally trusting the Lord to do the very best.
Often people rush into marriage, and make big mistakes. For those who are awaiting to be married, it is important to realize the need for marriage, pray much about it, take the necessary efforts for the same, and then the Lord will bring the right person into your life. The crucial part is to be patient and await God’s timing. Especially when some are getting older, they tend to get a bit agitated, and worry a lot. Parents also worry much about their children who are getting on in years. When one hurries into marriage, there is a greater chance that one could make a wrong choice, and regret later. If you are one who is awaiting for marriage, wait on the Lord, and He will certainly bring the suitable person at the right time. Your marriage will only then be peaceful and happy.
Made to be equal
The way God made Eve was not the way He made Adam. God took a rib from Adam’s side, and closed up his flesh. God didn’t choose a bone from Adam’s head, lest the woman thought she is superior to him. God didn’t choose a bone from Adam’s leg either, lest man think that the woman is inferior to him, and thereby try to dominate her. God made Eve from the rib of man to help them realize that they are equal in every way, which is quite contrary to what many men think.
The thing that makes the rib bone special is the fact that if it were hurt or injured, it has the capacity to heal on its own. The rib that is broken has the ability to grow back and be healed. Also the rib cage as we all know protects most of the vital organs in our human body. The husband is supposed to be the protector for his wife, just as the rib cage is a protection to us. Also the Lord took the Adam’s rib, and created Eve to help his realize that she was now part of his own flesh.
When God made man he created him from the dust of the ground, but the woman God made out of the rib of man. Many consider women as those who are weak, to be pitied, but interestingly God entrusted the responsibility to conceive and bear children only to the woman. The substance from which man was created and woman was created are different in nature. While man was created from dust, woman was created from his rib. Therefore, there is no such thing that one is strong and the other weak or vice versa. On the other hand, it is when both the husband and wife function together, that there is tremendous strength, and the outcome a healthy and blessed family.
There are some things that the man is capable of, and some things woman is capable of, and it is the synergy of the two that can shake the portals of society at large. Husband should not treat the woman like she is his slave, neither should a woman decide to be insubordinate and rebellious to her husband. We should be cautious as we live in a time when people are even shunning God’s divine plan, and opting for same sex marriages.
We must be constantly reminded that marriage is not man’s plan, but God’s idea and design. This is why Satan is all out to destroy families, by bringing untold problems and issues. If we can understand God’s plan for marriage as spelt out in the word of God, we will understand the purpose for which God ordained marriage. Only when both husband and wife realize that they are brought together by God, will each one fulfill their roles as designed by God Himself.
God gifted Eve to Adam
We read in Genesis 2:22, “And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.” (ESV)
God Himself brought Eve and presented her to Adam. In a wedding ceremony they generally ask this question, ‘Who gives this woman to be married to this man?’ Usually it is the bride’s father or someone close to the bride who does this. Interestingly, in the first wedding that took place in the Garden of Eden, God Himself brought the bride, and presented her to Adam. We therefore understand that marriage is highly esteemed by God, as He is the author, and the one who initiated the very first marriage.
As we wait patiently and prayerfully the Lord will certainly bring the right person into our life without any delay. The family that is built this way will be a joyful and happy family.
Adam recognized who Eve was
We read in Genesis 2:23, Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” (ESV)
When Adam saw Eve he immediately recognized that she was taken from him. He realized that this woman whom God had created was his own flesh and bone, and that she was a helper suitable for him. It was almost as if Adam broke forth in exclamation at the sight of Eve, in awe and wonder. Adam recognized that this woman whom God created belonged to him. This is what marriage will look, and feel like if God initiates it.
Oftentimes many rush into marriage without seeking God’s will and plan. The outcome is that there are numerous issues, and conflict in their relationships. When God brings a couple together, there is no room for separation for God’s word clearly instructs in Mark 10:9, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” (ESV)
There are some women who will refer to their husbands in a derogatory way when you ask them about their whereabouts, and many husbands do the same regarding their wives too. It was Palm Sunday in a church, and it was a tradition for all the members to take a procession with palm leaves in their hands. Most of them had made crosses with their palm leaves, and were entering the church after the procession. The Pastor who noticed a lady member without a palm cross in her hand asked her where her cross was, to which she immediately replied, ‘my cross is following me’ referring to her husband was coming behind her. Sounds funny, but often many wives think of their husbands as the cross they have to bear, and vice versa.
We need to have a change of heart and mind to accept our spouse as the right companion whom God has entrusted to us. There are no perfect spouses, and each of us have our own strengths and weaknesses. It is our duty to love our spouse, and fulfill our responsibilities, for only then our families will become a haven of happiness and peace.
It is important that we accept our spouse, and at no point in our marriage, even in the midst of conflict should we express regret for marrying our spouse. When we do so, it will cause unnecessary rift in the relationship. Every husband should thank God for the wife God has given, and so also every wife should be grateful to God for her husband.
Many a time parents make the mistake of giving unnecessary advice to their married children, and frequently interfere in their daily affairs. A word of counsel to such parents to not do so, and to refrain from any such intrusion in their children’s family matters. Parents should be a support, and never a hindrance to the welfare of their children’s family. Some women also have the habit of sharing all the conflicts in their marriage with their mothers, and this too can be quite detrimental to the healthy functioning of their family life.
Many parents, especially mothers encourage their daughter’s to come back to them when they are faced with any sort of discord with their husband’s. This is not good counsel, and this will certainly ruin the marriage relationship. No one should separate the husband and wife whom God has united.
I like the advice that a father gave to his daughter who was getting married. He told her, ‘daughter you can come home any time after your marriage, but always only with your husband.’ As parents it is our duty to pray for our married children. Even when they come and share some of their woes, we should just be sounding boards, and not be in a hurry to interfere and sort things for them, nor share such information with others. This haste has oftentimes resulted in many broken marriages. If we commit our children to the Lord, He will help them iron out all their differences, and live together in harmony.
We have in this message learnt how God designed the family. God Himself created a helper suitable for Adam, and God presented Eve to Adam. Adam too recognized that Eve was God’s perfect match, and together they knew they could accomplish great things for God. The enemy is out to destroy this beautiful plan and design of God.
These days many young people are disinclined towards marriage, and thus go against God’s plan. One should be cautious to not make such decisions, for later in life it will be disadvantageous to the individual, and to others as well. God decided that it was not good for man to live alone, and my counsel to those who are not married yet, is that you seek the Lord fervently to bring the suitable person in your life at the right time. So also those who are married rejoice over your spouse, and be grateful to God for the blessing of your husband or wife. If we do so, our children, and the generations to come will be blessed by the Lord.
Rev. F. Andrew Dixon
www.goodnewsfriends.net
Transcribed by: Sis. Esther Collins
