The Well, the Women, and the Wait
Genesis 29:1-30
16 Feb 2025
Last week, Scott spoke from Genesis 28 where Jacob was running from his brother Esau who was planning to kill him because he took the family blessing and inheritance that he was expecting to get. Jacob was on the run as a fugitive, spent the night in Bethel and was probably very discouraged, his mind racing, replaying the scenes that just unfolded. He’s alone and extremely exhausted, so much so that he falls asleep on a rock. It was that night that he dreamt about the ladder going from earth to heaven that the angels were ascending and descending where God speaks to him. God reaffirms to Jacob that he is in the patriarchal succession of the Abrahamic covenant, promises to be with him, to carefully watch over and guard him, and to bring him back to the promised land. This encounter with God definitely lightened the burden.
Today we are looking at Genesis 29:1-30:
Then Jacob went on his journey and came to the land of the people of the east. As he looked, he saw a well in the field, and behold, three flocks of sheep lying beside it, for out of that well the flocks were watered. The stone on the well’s mouth was large, and when all the flocks were gathered there, the shepherds would roll the stone from the mouth of the well and water the sheep, and put the stone back in its place over the mouth of the well.
Jacob said to them, “My brothers, where do you come from?” They said, “We are from Haran.” He said to them, “Do you know Laban the son of Nahor?” They said, “We know him.” He said to them, “Is it well with him?” They said, “It is well; and see, Rachel his daughter is coming with the sheep!” He said, “Behold, it is still high day; it is not time for the livestock to be gathered together. Water the sheep and go, pasture them.” But they said, “We cannot until all the flocks are gathered together and the stone is rolled from the mouth of the well; then we water the sheep.”
While he was still speaking with them, Rachel came with her father’s sheep, for she was a shepherdess. Now as soon as Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother’s brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother’s brother, Jacob came near and rolled the stone from the well’s mouth and watered the flock of Laban his mother’s brother. Then Jacob kissed Rachel and wept aloud. And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father’s kinsman, and that he was Rebekah’s son, and she ran and told her father.
As soon as Laban heard the news about Jacob, his sister’s son, he ran to meet him and embraced him and kissed him and brought him to his house. Jacob told Laban all these things, and Laban said to him, “Surely you are my bone and my flesh!” And he stayed with him a month.
Then Laban said to Jacob, “Because you are my kinsman, should you therefore serve me for nothing? Tell me, what shall your wages be?” Now Laban had two daughters. The name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. Leah’s eyes were weak, but Rachel was beautiful in form and appearance. Jacob loved Rachel. And he said, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than that I should give her to any other man; stay with me.” So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.
Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife that I may go in to her, for my time is completed.” So Laban gathered together all the people of the place and made a feast. But in the evening he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and he went in to her. (Laban gave his female servant Zilpah to his daughter Leah to be her servant.) And in the morning, behold, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?” Laban said, “It is not so done in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn. Complete the week of this one, and we will give you the other also in return for serving me another seven years.” Jacob did so, and completed her week. Then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. (Laban gave his female servant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel to be her servant.) So Jacob went into Rachel also, and he loved Rachel more than Leah, and served Laban for another seven years.
In verse 1 in this passage we see that Jacob went on his journey. After his encounter with God, the Hebrew brings out that he “lifted up his foot, walked with a lighter step.” In this moment Esau no longer concerned him; God promised He would protect and provide for him so now it’s onto the next mission to find a wife.
Jacob’s dad, Isaac, told him to travel to their relative’s hometown in this quest to find a God-fearing woman. Little did Jacob or his family realize that God would use the next years to work things in and out of his life. God would take him out of his comfort and security zones, so he could face unresolved issues with God and his family. So even though Jacob was running, God was at work.
We all have unsettled issues in our hearts. We don’t always recognize them until something or someone triggers them. Some want to put a lot of time and distance between these unresolved issues, even a change of scenery, which may be necessary to get some clarity. But what’s the most important thing to do in these situations? His Word instructs us when it comes to resolving issues on many different levels and running from our problems only prolongs the pain. You can’t run from your own heart. I believe God wants us to identify these issues and work through them with Him so we can be healthy and whole and fulfill our call.
God was preparing and equipping Jacob to become the father of 12 sons who would become the 12 tribes of Israel. Was it an easy path? There are a lot of promises God makes to us as His people. But I have found He will not fulfill them until He has prepared us, matured us, however long that may take, so that we’re able to and responsible enough to receive the blessing.
So what is the first thing Jacob sees when he arrives at the little village?
1. The Well
Jacob comes to the well but isn’t sure where he is and when he asks the shepherds they tell him he’s in Haran. What was the significance of Haran? It’s where Abraham settled before being called by God to Canaan and where Abraham’s servant found a wife for Isaac. In the biblical context, Haran is a place of beginnings, transitions, transformations, and progress. It’s where people saw the hand of God - and God brought Jacob to this place so that the next phase of His promise would be realized.
Shepherds normally come in the morning or evening to water their flocks, but here they are at noon. When Jacob asks whether they know Laban, they confirm that they did and lo and behold, Laban’s daughter Rachel shows up with her sheep.
Why they were waiting there in the hottest part of day no one knows but they had no interest in moving the big stone which obviously bothered Jacob. He said, “It’s not time for the livestock to be gathered together. Water the sheep and go, pasture them.” In other words, he was saying, “Take care of your responsibilities and get to work.” Some scholars speculate that Jacob was trying to get them to leave so he could spend some time with Rachel.
When Jacob saw her he went and rolled the stone from the well by himself and watered Laban’s flock. It was love at first sight, “Happy Valentine’s Day, Jacob.” Isn’t it amazing what a man will do when he is in love? Then he kissed Rachel (not a romantic kiss but as for a relative) and raised his voice and wept.
Rachel had no idea who this weeping man was. But Jacob is witnessing the sovereignty of God in the midst of the circumstances. Jacob sees what Abraham’s servant saw: the hand of God in the many events that have accompanied him on his journey. God guided him to the right well, to people who knew Laban, and at this precise time Rachel shows up with her sheep. Was this just a coincidence? Jacob is at the right place at the right time - just as God intended.
However, unlike Abraham’s servant, who arrived with an impressive arsenal of animals and riches (Gen 24:10, 22, 30, 53), Jacob arrives destitute and lacking everything his stolen blessing had supposedly conferred on him. Yet he comes with both the ancestral promise and with God’s presence. “All of Jacob’s issues, lying, deceit and scheming did not derail God’s plan for his life but it did affect how he would experience it.” Jacob had to learn the hard way that God’s ways are the best ways.
In v. 12, Jacob introduces himself to Rachel - “Do you know who I am? I am one of your relatives!” Rachel is very excited and brings him to her dad Laban and Jacob tells him the whole story of why he came to Padan Aram. We are beginning to see some positive changes in the character of Jacob. For one thing, now that he is on his own, he becomes quite bold as he confronts the shepherds, moves the stone, and introduces himself to Rachel. And he told Laban the story of what happened and why he was there - he was open and honest (29:13). Perhaps we are seeing maturity in Jacob’s character. Who do we read about next in this narrative?
2. The Women
Laban knew Jacob was looking for a wife and had come to marry one of his daughters (either Leah or Rachel). He knew that he was in line for the inheritance, but also knew he was coming empty-handed at this point and in a diminished position. Laban realized that Jacob was at his mercy and highly exploitable.
Who were the women in this story? Laban’s older daughter, Leah, who had weak eyes. She was more of the wall flower, sensitive, very shy, even though she was older, she had the look of someone younger. The other woman was his younger daughter, Rachel, who was more attractive, more mature, rugged, experienced with life and she’s the one that got Jacob’s attention.
Culturally speaking, marriages were often arranged by families, and women had limited agency in choosing their husbands. In this patriarchal, male-dominated society, a woman’s worth was tied to her role as a wife and mother rather than as an individual with her own identity and desire.
Since Jacob had no dowry he offered Laban a deal - to work for seven years for his daughter Rachel. Why seven years? Maybe Jacob was in no hurry to return home. He was okay for:
3. The Wait
Jacob worked hard as a shepherd for seven years and then asks Laban to give him his wife - this request indicates that Laban was holding out. So what happens on the night of the wedding? Laban throws a wedding feast and most likely gets Jacob drunk and then does the old bait-and-switch. He gives him Leah instead of Rachael.
There’s something called a bait-and-switch interview where a potential employee hires another person to be their stand-in during the job interview process. How do people get away with this? Have you ever experienced a bait-and-switch with an online purchase? We just ordered a carpet for our living room and based on the pictures and description - it was exactly what we wanted. When it arrived, it didn’t look anything like the picture and the description was completely inaccurate. Can you imagine this happening with your marriage partner?!
For the first time, Jacob becomes the object rather than the source of deception when Laban turns the tables on him. The similarity between what Laban does to Jacob and what Jacob did to Isaac (ch. 27) is clear. Jacob did the bait-and-switch with Isaac, masquerading as Esau his brother and now Laban is doing the bait-and-switch having Leah masquerade as Rachael. Does it make you wonder about Laban and Rebekah, brother and sister who put their kids up to these deceptions, and their kids who went along with it? Jacob is deceived as he deceived his father.
Warren Wiersbe said of the situation:
It’s an inescapable law of life that we eventually reap what we sow (Gal. 6:7–8). God in His grace forgives our sins when we confess them (1 John 1:9), but God in His government allows us to suffer the painful consequences of those sins. This disappointment was just the beginning of the harvest for Jacob.
Could you imagine Jacob’s shock when he woke up and saw Leah laying next to him? All that he worked for, all that he dreamed about was shattered in a moment - he got scammed! The betrayal, the hurt, the embarrassment and the rage. This whole scene is, as one author noted, “soap opera ugly.”
He asks Laban, “Why did you deceive me?” In verse 26, Laban informs Jacob that it’s not the custom in Paddan Aram to marry off a younger sister before the firstborn. Laban's stinging words are left without any editorial comment, Jacob is speechless - the event itself was God's rebuke and discipline on Jacob.
It is no different for God’s children. We know that God loves us and He is willing to patiently wait before disciplining us, but discipline He will, often using means similar to the offense to correct us. If we sow iniquity, we will reap sorrow (Prov. 22:8; 11:18); if we sow the wind, we will reap a whirlwind (Hos. 8:7; see also 10:12-13). The Bible tells us that whatever we sow, we will reap (Gal. 6:7). But on the other hand, if we sow or plant good things, we will reap good things from the Lord.
Jacob meekly accepted his lot and went back to work for another seven years. Little by little, Jacob was learning to submit to God’s loving hand of discipline, he learned to live with the consequences, and was growing in character. What do you think God was teaching Jacob about the reality of life? What virtues do you think God was working into his life? (empathy, humility, patience, honesty, repentance). Why didn’t God bail Jacob out of his trouble and allow Jacob to make his own mistakes?
There are many examples of billionaire parents who make their kids work minimum wage jobs as well as doing chores in the home. They let their kids learn the value of hard work, the value of making and spending their own money and how to develop social skills. Even the Kaisers in the Austro-Hungarian Empire had their sons learn a trade so they’d develop character and life skills. Doesn’t God do the same with us? He wants us to take responsibility for our lives and to develop godly character - allowing us to fail and even at times hit a brick wall.
As we look at this passage we can only imagine Laban congratulating himself on the success of his scheme, both daughters are married now and will inherit Isaac’s fortune and on top of that, he got 14 years of free labor. Did Laban get away with it? Later we will see that God reverses the fortune of Jacob and blesses him tremendously. As Proverbs says:
There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the Lord (Prov. 21:30).
Or as Jacob’s son Joseph would say years later in his own soap opera ugly, “You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good” (Gen 50:20). God’s plans and promises will always prevail.
Jacob had gotten himself into a mess and had to live with the fallout. Yet God was with Jacob throughout this journey. We might ask, “was that ladder from earth to heaven still open?” Was God still speaking? Was God there in Jacob’s misery? Yes, but did Jacob know it? Maybe not. Did Jacob run to God and seek His advice? Sadly no. But God would be with him and wait. Eventually Jacob would change, not overnight but over time. He would meet God, wrestle with Him and become Israel - a prince of God.
I believe this is what God wants to teach us - that life is far more than just having the promise and protection of God and then living the way we want. If we all lived with this mentality what are we reproducing in others? What type of church would we be? The theme this year in our church is multiply - and the question we are asking ourselves is what does the Lord want to produce in the lives of His children?
I’m going through a book about godly virtues with a couple of young men. If I teach these principles or teach God’s precepts to you on Sundays but don’t live by them, I have to ask myself what am I reproducing in others? Is God first in my life or is it just empty words? Or am I reproducing in others faith in and dependence on God? Am I exhibiting love for my spouse, love for the family of God? Sometimes I fail miserably at this. But is the communication still open with God? Is he still speaking? Can I come to him at any time? The answer is yes to all of these questions.
What about you as a parent, as a friend, as a teacher, or a mentor? What is your life communicating to others - what do you want to reproduce in the lives of others?
