I want to talk to you about turning to God prayer to destress your home for the next few minutes.
We launch a new series where we are looking at four attitudes that every home should have in the coming weeks.
I invite you to find Psalm 4 with me.
Children and parents are stressed! Parents face stress as they balance their needs at work with time with family. The Surgeon General reports that 4 in 10 parents face so much stress they cannot function most days.1 The Surgeon General reports found that 65 percent of parents and 77 percent of single parents report feeling lonely. Then, there is the “alarming” increase in the number of teens facing mental health issues.2 Children face stress from academic success, peer pressure, and dealing with divorced parents. People try Xanax, yoga, and meditation to destress.
Psalm 4 is a prayer for your family in times of distress. We know who wrote this psalm—David. And we also know it’s a prayer for times of stress. But we don’t know the exact reason for David’s distress. David shows us that prayer is a powerful antidote to the stress in our families and in our lives.
Today’s Scripture
To the choirmaster: with stringed instruments. A Psalm of David.
Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness!
You have given me relief when I was in distress.
Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!
O men, how long shall my honor be turned into shame?
How long will you love vain words and seek after lies? Selah
But know that the Lord has set apart the godly for himself;
the Lord hears when I call to him.
Be angry, and do not sin;
ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent. Selah
Offer right sacrifices,
and put your trust in the Lord.
There are many who say, “Who will show us some good?
Lift up the light of your face upon us, O Lord!”
You have put more joy in my heart
than they have when their grain and wine abound.
In peace I will both lie down and sleep;
for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety” (Psalm 4:1-8).
Notice the inscription above verse one: “To the choirmaster: with stringed instruments. A Psalm of David.” This was written so people would sing this psalm in worship. This is a public prayer or even a model prayer for when you are in times of trouble. Now, you’ll have to come back next week to hear me sing this ?. While I won’t sing today, I will preach it. And I will pray it with you.
1. Answer Me When I Call
“Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!” (Psalm 4:1).
1.1 Answer Me
David begins his prayer with a request, “Answer me when I call,” at the beginning of verse 1. David’s prayer begins with a command, “Answer me.” He follows this with a second command, “Be gracious to me,” toward the end of verse 1. Then, at the very end of verse 1, he follows this with yet another command: “Hear my prayer.” Answer me, be gracious to me, and hear my prayer. He says he’s in distress and he needs God’s help.
1.2 Short Prayers
This is a short prayer – it’s only one verse long. Don’t overlook the power of short prayers. In a busy day packed with a million things to do, don’t overlook the power of short prayers. A short prayer like, “God, help me,” right at the moment something challenging is coming your way. You don’t have to kneel, lift your hands in the air, or even pray out loud. You can pray a silent “911 prayer” in your time of distress. Don’t overlook the power of short prayers.
1.3 I’m in a Tight Spot
The word “distress” in verse 1 in the original language means someone who’s in a tight corner. The words “Be gracious” mean to give us space, and they are an antonym for distress. Today, we speak about being in a tight spot. Lord, be gracious to me and get me out of this tight spot, Lord!
Families can get in tight spots. There’s the prayer you pray when your child tells you he has a science project due the next day. There’s the prayer you pray when you are dealing with financial stress raising kids. Families can get in tight spots.
1.4 What’s Wrong?
We don’t know the exact nature of the problem, but we can tell it must be a doozy from verse 2, “O men, how long shall my honor be turned into shame? How long will you love vain words and seek after lies?” (Psalm 4:2).
1.4.1 Men
The word “men” at the beginning of verse 2 is not just ordinary men. The English versions don’t show this, but the Hebrew word for “men” here is for the powerful in society. These are men of prominent citizens – landowners and wealthy.3 Whatever the problem is, it is significant.
1.4.2 Seek After Lies
Notice these influential men “seek after lies” in verse 2. Picture someone who devotes all their energies and their life after lies and deception.4 Somehow, significant, influential people are lying about David, and he feels the brunt of their accusations. When David asks “how long” twice in the early part of verse 2 and in the later part, you get a picture of exasperation. Whatever the problem, it’s been going on for a while. Usually, when problems persist, they tire us and drain nearly our energy from us.
1.5 Brimming with Confidence
But David is brimming with confidence that God will answer him despite the length of the problem. Look at the end of verse 3, where David says, “The Lord hears when I call to him.” When you put “Answer me when I call” from verse 1 alongside “The Lord hears when I call to him” from verse 3… … you begin to sense David’s confidence. Imagine David is standing on a mountain facing a valley when he calls out in verse 1, “Answer me when I call,” only to hear himself echo, “The Lord hears when I call to him” in verse 3. Again, David is brimming with confidence. He just knows God will hear him when he calls.
1.5.1 God’s Record of Past Performance
Why is David so confident? David is strengthened by his faith when he remembers what God had done for him in the past: “You have given me relief when I was in distress.” (Psalm 4:1b). David could look back on those years when Saul had hunted him and closed in for the kill. Again and again, God came through when David’s life hung in the balance.5
Answered prayer is a major confidence booster.
1.5.2 David and Distress
David had God’s number on speed dial when distress came his way. David knows that God is good to him whenever he gets into tight spots.
“In my distress I called upon the LORD; to my God I cried for help. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry to him reached his ears” (Psalm 18:6).
He calls on God to “bring me out of my distresses.” when the troubles of his heart are large (Psalm 25:17). When the king stationed armed men to watch his house to kill him, David knew the Lord was “a refuge in the day of my distress” (Psalm 59:16). David’s stress got so bad that he asks, “Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eye is wasted from grief; my soul and my body also” (Psalm 31:9). Yes, David is confident that the Lord has “known the distress of my soul” (Psalm 31:7).
David loves to call on God when he’s in distress. David knows that God is the MVP of answered prayer. Again, answered prayer is a major confidence booster.
1.5.3 Go-To Moms
Some of the mothers will know excellent volunteers in their children’s schools, sports leagues, and robotic teams. You have that one “go-to” mom or dad for snacks. You are confident she will volunteer because she’s been so reliable in the past. When you pray to God, He is most reliable. Remember what you pray for, and remember how God answers your prayers. When you take careful note of how He’s answered prayer, then you have even greater confidence to pray. Answered prayer is a major confidence booster.
1.6 Shooting in Harrisburg
Again, David asks for God to be gracious to him when he was in a tight spot. Families get in tight spots.
Just this past week, delivery driver and dad Antoine Byers Sr. thought he knew his son. He raised Antoine Jr. as a single father since shortly after his boy was born.6 It wasn’t until after his 17-year-old son was killed this past Monday in a shooting in Harrisburg, PA, that the truth started to emerge. When the dad was going through his son’s phone and belongings revealed a “double life,” that the father said he never suspected. The grieving father said, “I spent way too much time at work and not enough time going through his life outside of home. I’m ashamed of how [his son] portrayed his home… on the internet.” In the midst of his tears, he said, “I’m in awe in what I’m finding out about what my son was into... I’m having an awaking moment going [through] my son’s stuff after his death. I think his death was needed for God to use me to open Pandora’s box. CHECK YOUR KIDS PHONES.”
Families are experiencing severe stress. Your family may be in the midst of financial problems – have you seen the price of groceries? Or you are struggling with a bully at school.
1.7 Prayer First
Pay careful attention to the order now: David speaks to God before he speaks to the people who are causing the problem.7 David speaks to God in verse 1 before he speaks to the people in verse 2. So many times, we reverse this. If we have a problem with someone, we talk to them first and only talk to God as a last resort. Prayer should be our first response rather than our last resort.
1.8 Pray with Your Children
Moms and Dads, make sure you pray with your children. Teach your family that prayer is a great place to turn to in times of distress. When parents pray with their children, you are giving them a lifelong tool to deal with stress in the lives. They will naturally turn to God in prayer as routine. God is eager to hear your prayer and to answer your prayer.
1. Answer Me When I Call
2. Trust in the Lord
“But know that the Lord has set apart the godly for himself; the Lord hears when I call to him” (Psalm 4:3).
In the middle of this prayer, David turns to speak to those who are falsely accusing him. It’s like the prayer in verse 1 is interrupted so he can talk to the people causing him problems.
2.1 7 Commands
Beginning at verse 3, you are given seven commands: “Know,” “Be angry,” “Do not sin,” “Ponder,” “Be silent,” “Offer,” and “Trust.” Each of the commands was given to David’s opponents.
2.1.1 Command #1: The Lord Looks After His Own
“But know that the Lord has set apart the godly for himself” (Psalm 4:3a).
David commands us to grasp the trust that God looks after His own. God is a protector of His own. “Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world” (1 John 4:4).
2.1.2 Command #2: You Can’t Help Being Afraid
What the English Standard Versions translates as “Be angry” (Psalm 4:4a), other translations such as the NET Translation translate the Hebrew there as, “Tremble with fear” (Psalm 4:4a).
2.1.3 Command #3: Don’t Let Fear/Anger Become a Sin
“Be angry, and do not sin” (Psalm 4:3a).
Or be fearful, and don’t sin. When the emergencies of life come, pause, even if for a microsecond. Know that right then and there, “The Lord has set apart the godly for himself” (Psalm 4:3a). He’s got you.
2.1.4 Command #4: Ponder
“Ponder in your own hearts on your beds” (Psalm 4:4b).
Think over this. Marinate and meditate on how the Lord has you in His grip. He’s got you.
2.1.5 Command #5: Be Silent
“Be silent” (Psalm 4:4c).
Another phrase for “be silent” is don’t talk. Take off the headphones.
2.1.6 Command #6: Offer Right Sacrifices
“Offer right sacrifices” (Psalm 4:5a).
Jesus is our sacrifice.
2.1.7 Command #7: Trust in the Lord
“Trust in the Lord” (Psalm 4:5c).
When fear and anger come your way, quiet yourself in order to remind yourself you are the Lord’s.
2.2 The Father Loves to Answer His Children
Jesus talked about prayer one time in terms of a father giving his children gifts: “If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (Luke 11:13). Jesus’ logic is simple: dads are sinful people, but even they don’t give scorpions when their children ask for eggs (Luke 11:12). Jesus’ logic is simple: dads are sinful people, but even they don’t give serpents when their children ask for fish (Luke 11:11). God is eager to hear your prayer and to answer your prayer.
2.3 God’s Response to Our Prayers
Prayer is not telling what to do and then expecting Him to immediately say “Yes” to your commands. Someone has said that God answers some prayers, “Yes,” others, “No,” and still others, “Wait.” God may answer a few prayers: “You gotta be kidding me.”8 As was recently shared with me, "The 'no' from God is always better than the 'yes' we thought was best."
I like what another person said when we ask for the wrong thing in prayer. God says, “No,” but if our timing is off, God says, “Slow.” If our request is way off, God says, “Grow!” But if our request is right and our timing is right, God says, “Go!”9
We know that God is a wise, loving heavenly Father who knows what is best for us and what is best for everyone else.
2.4 Denise at Wells Fargo
Did you hear about the incident at Wells Fargo in Tempe, AZ, a few weeks ago? Denise scanned into work at the Tempe, AZ, Wells Fargo on Friday, August 20. But it wasn’t until four days later that she was found dead in her cubicle. Yes, it took four whole days before anyone noticed that 60-year-old Denise had died.10 Unlike Wells Fargo, God knows what is happening with you immediately. God is eager to hear your prayer and to answer your prayer. He’s a good Father who gives His children what they need.
2. Trust in the Lord
3. Sleep Peacefully
“In peace, I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety” (Psalm 4:8). People are expected to spend $32 billion annually by 2027 on sleep-tracking devices.11 Americans spend over $400 million annually on OTC sleep medications and another $1.5 billion on prescription drugs for better sleep.12
3.1 The Inner Change
David experiences a radical inner change when he prays. He says, “I sleep good because the Lord makes me safe.” I have more inner happiness than a rich man who has a table full of wine and the finest foods (Psalm 4:7). King David tells us that despite all his worries as king, he sleeps better when he prays.
3.2 What’s Your Confidence Meter?
Is your confidence higher in your ability to handle your problems or in God’s ability to handle your problems? If your confidence were a temperature gauge, how high would your prayer temperature be? Do you remember the old temperature gauges your mom put in your mouth when you had a fever? How high would the mercury rise if your prayer confidence was a temperature gauge? Is your confidence in the winter 30s or closer to the Texas summer heat of 110? Are you confident God hears you when you pray? Dad, your family needs you to increase your confidence meter in prayer. Mom, your family needs you to increase your confidence meter in prayer.
3.3 Pagan Saxon King
A pagan Saxon king invaded Wales and was about to go to battle, but the Welsh were Christians. The pagan Saxon king observed the army of his opponents spread out before him. It was then he noticed a host of unarmed men. Why would anyone send out unarmed men to a battle? When he asked who they were, he was told that they were the Christian monks of Bangor, praying for the success of their army. The pagan king immediately realized the seriousness of the situation. He ordered his men to “attack them first.” Many non-Christians have more respect for the “sturdy reality” of prayer than we do. The power of prayer “is no fiction, whatever [we] may think of it.”13 People try Xanax, yoga, and meditation to destress. David says, “I pray.” Your home needs a steeple.
3.4 Why Are You Not Praying?
As one person had said, “When I pray, things happen, and when I don't pray, they don’t.” A prayerless Christian is like a bus driver trying alone to push his bus out of a rut because he doesn’t know Clark Kent is on board. A prayerless Christian is like having your room wallpapered with Saks Fifth Avenue gift certificates but always shopping at Goodwill simply because you can’t read.14 God’s answers to your prayer can come before you finish your prayer: “Before they call I will answer; while they are yet speaking I will hear.” (Isaiah 65:24). God is very much like a runner at a track and field event, waiting for the starting pistol to fire.
3.5 One Prayer God Loves to Answer
There’s one prayer that our God loves to answer. It’s the prayer when a sinner calls on God to forgive him/her. I invite you to pray with me to call on the Lord to wipe your slate clean by virtue of the cross of Christ.
EndNotes
1 https://www.politico.com/news/2024/08/28/parents-relief-harris-trump-murthy-00176460; accessed September 5, 2024.
2 https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-youth-mental-health-advisory.pdf; accessed September 5, 2024.
3 Peter C. Craigie, Psalms 1–50, Word Biblical Commentary, 2nd ed (Nashville, TN: Nelson Reference & Electronic, 2004), 80.
4 Alec Motyer, Psalms by the Day: A New Devotional Translation (Christian Focus, 2016), 16.
5 James A. Johnston, Preaching the Word: The Psalms: Rejoice, the Lord Is King—Psalms 1 to 41, ed. R. Kent Hughes, Preaching the Word (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2015), 55.
6 https://www.pennlive.com/news/2024/08/dad-of-17-year-old-killed-in-harrisburg-said-his-son-was-living-a-double-life.html; accessed September 4, 2024.
7 Johnston, 55.
8 Dave Early, The 21 Most Effective Prayers in the Bible (PrayerShop Publishing, 2023), xii.
9 Early, xii.
10 https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/officials-probe-death-wells-fargo-employee-found-dead-cubicle-4-days-l-rcna168756; accessed September 4, 2024.
11 https://www.gminsights.com/industry-analysis/sleep-tech-devices-market; accessed September 8, 2024.
12 https://www.statista.com/statistics/506604/otc-revenue-of-sleeping-aid-in-the-us/; accessed September 8, 2024.
13 Austin Phelps, The Still Hour: Or Communion with God (Carlisle, PA: Banner of Truth, 1974), 27–28; as quoted in Timothy Keller, Prayer: Experiencing Awe and Intimacy with God. (New York: Dutton, 2014), 224.
14 John Piper, Desiring God: Meditations of a Christian Hedonist (Sisters, Oregon: Multnomah Books, 1996), 139.
