On July 4th, 1826 two of our nation’s Founding Fathers died (that same day) within hours of each other. John Adams & Thomas Jefferson (the 2nd and 3rd Presidents of the U. States) both died on July 4th.
What makes this interesting is that Adams and Jefferson were close friends. In 1775 they met at the Continental Congress and later collaborated on the Declaration of Independence. They were so close that, after Jefferson's wife died in 1782, John and Abigail Adams regularly had Jefferson to their home.
Though they differed politically, they remained close friends until Adams ran for a 2nd term as President… and Jefferson ran against him. Then things got nasty real quick.
Jefferson won (pause) but the campaign was so filled with insults and personal attacks that they both became angry with each other, and Adams was so bitter he left town before the inauguration ceremony. From that point on the two became bitter rivals who refused to speak to each other for the next 12 years. Both of them felt justified in their hatred of the other… (pause). But then, a few years later, one of Jefferson’s neighbors visited Adams in Massachusetts and reported that Adams’ said: “I always loved Jefferson, and still love him.” When Jefferson heard this, he wrote: “this is enough for me. I only needed this knolege to revive towards him all the affections of the most cordial moments of our lives.” And they began to write to each other. And when they died, they died as close friends again.
(https://www.monticello.org/site/research-and-collections/john-adams and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-aeo8Ml4R4 - at the 36 minute time mark)
Now anger destroys stuff. It destroys friendships, marriages, families, and even entire nations. And that’s what happened in the life of the 1ST of King Israel– King Saul.
Saul was a man whose ANGER destroyed his family and … ultimately his own life
In our text today we read that Saul nearly killed his own son in a fit of rage. He angrily told Jonathan that “as long as the son of Jesse (David) lives on the earth, neither you nor your kingdom shall be established. Therefore send and bring him to me, for he shall surely die." Then Jonathan answered his father, "Why should he be put to death? What has he done?" But Saul hurled his spear at (his son Jonathan) to strike him. I Samuel 20:30-33
He could have killed his own son because he was angry. And that’s NOT the only time that Saul lost his temper. Several times Saul tried to kill David, even chasing David across the wilderness to destroy him.
And because - the priests at the Tabernacle - had helped David as he fled, Saul destroyed the city where the priests lived.. “(He put) to the sword - Nob, the town of the priests, with its men and women, its children and infants, and its cattle, donkeys and sheep.” 1 Samuel 22:19
Saul was NOT a very nice guy, and it was his anger that made him what he was.
The thing was, Saul felt justified in his anger. He felt he had a right to his rage.And the focus of his anger was a young man named David. You see, David was a better man than Saul was… and Saul knew it. David was a skilled singer and musician; He was a great warrior; and David had faced and defeated a giant that King Saul was afraid to face.
We’re told that: When the men were returning home after David had killed (Goliath), the women came out from all the towns of Israel to meet King Saul with singing and dancing, with joyful songs and with tambourines and lutes.
As they danced, they sang: "Saul has slain his thousands, and David his tens of thousands." Saul was very angry; this refrain galled him. "They have credited David with tens of thousands," he thought, "but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?" And from that time on Saul kept a jealous eye on David. I Samuel 18:6-9
And so, King Saul hated David, and he became blinded by the belief that – he was justified in his anger. He considered his hatred to be NORMAL.
ILLUS: I once talked with a preacher who was counseling a man who had problems. The man was divorced, his children didn’t like being around him, and his life was falling apart. As the preacher talked with the man he realized what the problem was. He told the man: “The problem is - you’re an angry man.” The man responded: “No I’m not.” But because the preacher insisted that he was, the man went to two more counselors who told him the same thing: He WAS an angry man. His features were hardened, and he his voice was harsh. You could feel the anger in everything he did.
And yet, he was blind to his anger … and it was destroying him.
The Bible tells us:
Proverbs 25:28 Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.
Proverbs 16:32 Better … a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.
Proverbs 29:11 A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
James 1:20 (NKJV) The wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
Uncontrolled, life-dominating anger, will destroy us. It will destroy our friendships, marriages, and families. Everything we touch! So God says – don’t do that!!!
“Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:30-32
In other words: if we want to please God, we need to avoid being taken over by our anger. The question is, how do we do that? How do we keep anger from taking over? Well, first we need to recognize that allowing anger to control us… is dangerous.
Mark Twain once noted “It takes me a long time to lose my temper, but once I lose it, I couldn’t find it with a dog.”
Have you ever lost your temper? I have! I’ve lost my temper more often than I care to admit. One time I got so mad (at myself) that I slammed my hand against the wall and broke my wrist! That wasn’t too bright – was it? And yet, NOT controlling my temper was dangerous
Now that brings us to the 2nd way we can avoid letting anger take over - and that is to CONTROL our temper. We need to decide to control our anger. Proverbs 29:11 “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.”
Believe it or not… you CAN control your temper.
A few weeks ago we talked about the story of Cain and Abel. Cain became angry because God accepted Abel’s sacrifice but not his. And so he was furious. Apparently, he brooded about that “injustice” for a long time and we’re told that “Cain was very angry, and his face fell.”
So God paid Cain a visit and He said: “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you, but YOU MUST RULE OVER IT."
Cain was angry, and God said “you can control this.” You can MASTER your emotions.”
ILLUS: A friend of mine talked about going to a High School basketball game one time with his girlfriend. He got caught up in the emotion of the game and he shouted things that weren’t very nice at the players on the other team and at the referees that were on the floor. After the game was over, his girlfriend looked him in the eye and said: “If you ever behave like that again… we’re through.” And guess what? He NEVER behaved like that again. He controlled his behavior because he loved her more anything.
So you see, we CAN control our tempers - we’ve just got to decide that it’s NOT worth the cost of letting go. Letting our anger control us is just NOT worth the price.
There’s an interesting passage in Ephesians 4:26 “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger.” In other words – you can be mad about some things, but you can only allow yourself to be mad until the sun goes down. You’ve got that long to get your temper under control.
And it’s OK. You CAN be angry about some things, just don’t sin! Don’t throw things; Don’t curse; Don’t insult people; and (for pity’s sake) don’t hit anything and break your wrist.
You can be angry but don’t sin, and don’t let your anger last longer than a few hours. You’ve got until the sun goes down to get your act together.
So 1st – We need to RECOGNIZE that an uncontrolled temper is dangerous
2nd – We need to REALIZE that we CAN control our tempers
And 3rd – We need to REFUSE to accept the fallacy of a justified rage. We need to refuse to believe that we have the right, to be angry about whatever it is that’s got us angry.
You see, that’s what got King Saul into trouble. He felt justified in being angry at David. And that’s what got CAIN into trouble. He felt justified in being angry at his brother. Both men felt JUSTIFIED… and both paid a terrible price.
Now, one last thought – King Saul lost his temper because he had forgotten God. He didn’t trust God to take care of what was wrong in his life. He felt powerless and vulnerable… because he felt threatened by David. But NEVER ONCE did Saul ask God to help him. NEVER ONCE did he behave like someone who believed God would fix his problems.
Long ago, Saul had turned away from God and decided that he could fix his own problems, he didn’t really need God’s help! But without God, he ended up feeling trapped by conditions he couldn’t control - and he didn’t like that. As a result, he lashed out at David, and Jonathan, and the priests at Nob. I mean anyone who got in his way felt his wrath.
Now we may not be as nasty as Saul was when we get angry. But when we try to fix things OUR WAY, we end up being frustrated and angry, and we can end up feeling worse and worse. And we might end up saying things and doing things we’ll regret.
By contrast, the man Saul hated wasn’t like that. David (unlike Saul) looked to God for his help. When David was running from King Saul he wrote Psalm 31:1-5.
“In you, O LORD, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Incline your ear to me; rescue me speedily! Be a rock of refuge for me, a strong fortress to save me! For you are my rock and my fortress; and for your name’s sake you lead me and guide me; you take me out of the net they have hidden for me, for you are my refuge. Into your hand I commit my spirit; you have redeemed me, O LORD, faithful God.”
Because David trusted in God… he never hated Saul. He had a opportunities to embarrass and even kill Saul but he refused to do it because he trusted God to solve his problem. The difference for David was – he looked to God for his help and for his light.
Isaiah 59:9 (NKJV) tells us that when we don’t look to God for our help “We look for light, but there is darkness! For brightness, but we walk in blackness!”
Without God, everything appears dark, hopeless, and empty.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Jesus said “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness but will have the light of life." John 8:12
CLOSE: Here’s the deal – when life gets dark and hopeless and empty Jesus is OUR light to guide us out of that darkness. Because of Jesus, Romans 8:28 (NKJV) promises that “all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
So… do you believe that? Are you willing to trust God to guide and protect you? We live in a fallen world where there are many things that will upset us and even frighten us, but Jesus promises tells us that He has overcome the world, and He will be our light in a dark world to light our path and lead us where we need to go.
INVITATION
