Like you, I have made so many attempts at improving in areas of my life. I struggle with patience with certain people – someone put a hand over my family’s mouths at this point. If I know anything about anything, I imagine you have your struggles as well.
The Bible offers you some weapons of how to improve yourself. They are often overlooked; let’s discover the rich spiritual resources of Colossians 3:5-17.
1. Don’t Try to Be a Good Person
Your biggest failure in trying to be a good person is you’re JUST trying to be a good person. You think the shortest path to being a better person is JUST to try to be a better person. Nothing could be further from the truth. We were told in school that the quickest path between two points is a straight line. What may be true in geometry, isn’t true in right and wrong. The quickest way to repeated moral failure is to only try to do the right thing.
1.1 A Little Experiment
How good of a person are you really? I want you to really do something for me for one week: don’t gossip, don’t defend yourself, and don’t brag. In other words, say nothing bad about anybody else, never defend yourself, and don’t brag. You just try that for a week and just see how easy it is. Again, the quickest way to repeated moral failure is to only try to do the right thing.
Look at the link beginning in verse 3: “For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God” (Colossians 3:3). Compare this to verse 5: “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5).
Here’s how the Bible argues: Because you have experienced a death, now you must part of you to death. If you want to be a better person, you must experience a death. Some part of you must die. Why must a part of you die? Because you lack the power to be a better person.
Look back at Colossians 2:23 with me: “These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh” (Colossians 2:23).
Talking about the word, flesh, when the Bible says, “kill the flesh” or “war against the flesh,” it’s not talking about your body. Usually, when the Bible talks about the flesh versus the spirit, the flesh is Self. It’s the “old” man. The flesh is when your inside thermostat is set for selfishness and against God.
1.2 Tied to the Mast
Do you know the story of Odysseus of ancient Greek mythology? Odysseus wanted to hear the Siren’s song, the song of a dangerous creature that lured nearby sailors with enchanting music to their deaths. The Siren’s song was notorious in Greek mythology of bringing sailors into cliffs and rocks where they would capsize their ship. So Odysseus made a pact because he wanted to hear the beautiful Siren’s songs but he knew it would render him incapable of rational thought. So he had the men of the ship put wax in their ears so they couldn’t hear the enchanting music. Then he had the men to tie him to the mast – Odysseus was physically tied to the mast with his men surrounding him with drawn swords if he managed to break free. You cannot simply try to be a good person because you don’t know the power of the Siren’s Song.
Jesus described sin’s seductive power when He said, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who practices sin is a slave to sin” (John 8:34). Jesus says you’re controlled by your ambitions, your own lusts, your own ego, and your own pride. The Bible says all of us are sinners. Your sins, the Bible says, have a life of their own. They’ll come get you. Salves don’t free themselves. You must experience a death to be a better person. Like Odysseus, you have to realize you lack the power to be a better person.
Anyone who thinks that doing the right thing is as simple as JUST doing the right thing is naïve at best. Your path to be better has to take a detour. You have to go to by Calvary before you can truly be a good person. If you understand the gospel (that Jesus Christ has covered your sins and he actually is your Savior) that means God doesn’t accept you because of your efforts but because of what Jesus has done.
Let the Apostle Paul show us…
Back in verse 2, he told us to live with a specific focus: “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth” (Colossians 3:2). Compare this to verse 5: “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5).
Because you are a genuine believer and you will experience the resurrection, you should now, “seek the things that are above, where Christ is…” Keep your focus above. Keep your focus away from earthly. Why can’t you simply try to be a good person? Because you don’t have the power to continually do good sustained over a long time.
1.3 Put to Death
“Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5).
Again, conversion means death. If you don’t die with Christ, you won’t have the power to steer yourself to do right. Conversion to Christ means death to yourself. If you don’t die with Christ, you don’t believe on Christ. That is the meaning of becoming a Christian. It is a profound spiritual event that involves your death to sin.
Again, you are asking, “How Can I Be a Better Person?”
1.3 The Correct Sequence
So, you have to get the correct sequence – you got to pay attention to the order. Look at back at Colossians 1:13: “He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son…” (Colossians 1:13). You cannot simply attempt to live right without receiving the work Christ has done for you. No, Christ must deliver you from the domain of darkness and transfer you to His kingdom before you will be able to be a better person.
“having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead” (Colossians 2:12).
The new birth is where you place your faith in Christ. Again, you must have the sequence correct. Too many people get this out of order. Wouldn’t you play a few chords of “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” before you attempted Mozart? For the computer geeks listening, a good coders will learn “Hello World” before you attempt to build an iPhone. And you don’t put your shoes before you put on your socks. You have to experience a death to your old life if you’re going to experience a new life.
To live without God is like trying to pull a wagon without wheels. It kind of works, but it drags, and it scrapes along. Eventually, it disintegrates. Your life before Christ kind of works for a while, but eventually, as time goes on, your life disintegrates. Again, you need God’s power in order be a good person.
1.4 Wrap Up
You must go to the cross of Christ and embrace Christ by faith. In the spiritual reality, the believer “went to the cross” with Christ, was buried with Christ, and arose a new person.
1. Don’t Try to Be a Good Person
2. Try to Be a Good Person
2.1 Two Kinds of People
There are two kinds of people here.
The first group thinks all this is really simple. They believe it’s as simple as this: If you want to be a better person, then choose to be a better person. No need to bother with religion and a bloody cross. This group believes: If you want to be a better person, then choose to be a better person.
The second group here think something like this: now that I am a Christian, it doesn’t matter if I am good. Now that I have experienced the new birth, God’s grace will cover my sins – case closed. So many Christians become lazy and they quit trying.
2.2 A Third Way
But there’s a third way… … once you experience life-changing conversion, you put in the work to be a better person.
But see what the Bible says: “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5). Nothing can be further from the truth: “But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth” (Colossians 3:8).
So many Christians don’t try to be good people in one area of their lives. Too many church-going people are passive and give themselves a pass. There’s no “oomph” to your moral life. You think, it doesn’t really matter what you do since I am a Christian. You need to put it the effort at being godly. Don’t make excuses for yourself.
2.3 Your Two Battles
Before Christ, your inside thermostat was set for selfishness and against God. But when you experienced conversion and the love of God, now an alien force invades you. Your new self is fighting against your old self. You find yourself in a civil war. Now, you have inside you two natures pulling in opposite directions.
The Bible says you are in the midst of a deadly feud. The first fight (before your conversion) you had to lose. You were fighting God Himself. You were wise to lay down your arms because you were fighting a losing battle. The second fight you must win for God is NOW fighting on your behalf. Isn’t that good news?
So you’re caught in an inner war, a daily civil war. Your flesh can still operate even after you become a Christian. People who still have a need to dominate the discussion and bend everything back to themselves. You can dominate the conversation and do humble bragging in your Bible studies.
Have you ever meet a jerk for Jesus? They were insufferable to be around before they met the Lord and they are insufferable to be around after they meet the Lord?
Remember my little experiment? Try this for just one week: don’t gossip, don’t defend yourself, and don’t brag. In other words, say nothing bad about anybody else, never defend yourself, and don’t brag.
2.4 Old Clothes
The Bible describes how you can change into being a better person by using the metaphor of changing clothes.
Toward the end of college, I had a job fueling airplanes in small airport. Traci and I were dating in those days. So I would drive over to her house as soon as work was done. But her mother and her wouldn’t let me in the house because my clothes smelled of airplane fuel. So they told me to go to the garage and strip off my clothes before even coming in the door. I had to change into a clean set of clothes before coming in the house.
“Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator” (Colossians 3:9-10).
If only it were that easy as changing clothes! Paul is using a clothing metaphor throughout the passage. Before you can clothe yourself in the virtues, you must strip off your old clothes.
Are you awake to your problem? Are you awake or asleep to your problem?
The only way your flesh can completely dominate you is if you are not aware of it at all. In a battle, for example, if the enemy is completely unknown to you (you don’t know where the enemy is or what their movements are at all) you’re going to get annihilated. If on the other hand, you can spot the enemy’s movements then you’re going to have a big fight.
We are told the kind of habits to get rid of in verse 5: “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5). Four of these deadly sins have to do with sex in verse 6.
Christians treat sex differently.
Again, you need to be awake to the fight going on inside you. If you’re not engaged in the fight, then you’ve lost. Are you awake to know there’s a battle going on? Do you feel as if there is a fight inside you?
Let’s focus on one sin in particular: “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5).
The original Greek word for the words “sexual immorality” is where we get the word pornographic. Pornography is a big deal and it will kill you. Every 73 seconds, someone is sexually assaulted in the United States. We have a rape kit backlog in many cities where many a “rape kit” is collected and booked into evidence. It is estimated, however, that there are hundreds of thousands of untested kits in police and crime lab storage facilities throughout the country. That is terrible in so many ways. One way, we can reduce the number of rapes in America (not the only way but one way)… … is rid ourselves of pornography. Studies have shown a link between the awful crime of rape and the practice of pornography.
This means getting rid of magazine you have in garage. It mean unsubscribing from cable or satellite – blocking certain channels. This means placing filters on your internet. It means talking about the deadly impact of pornography for you sons and grandsons.
The truth is your old life will follow you around once you embrace Christ. Your old life will act like a zombie and you must kill it. My old life follows me around like a zombie.
Stop rationalizing your sins. Don’t give your sins nice names. If you say, “Well, my feelings get hurt pretty easily,” you mean you’re bitter. If you say, “I’m just very, very concerned,” you’re actually eaten up with anxiety.
2.5 New Clothes
Move your eyes down to verse 8: “But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth 9 Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices (Colossians 3:8-9).
If those are the clothes to remove, he quickly tells us the new kind of threads we are to put on: “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive” (Colossians 3:12-13).
2.6 Walk Not Talk
You must walk by faith and NOT talk by faith. You demonstrate faith not by what you say but by what you do. Faith shows up in your feet, not just in your feelings. That is why Paul instructed us to “walk by faith,” not to “talk by faith.” Faith is a powerful action. Jesus said that whoever has faith the size of a mustard seed can move a mountain into the sea. It’s not talk by faith; it’s walk by faith.
